Hip-hip-hooray . . . for laundry day!
Joshua: What did the washer say to the dryer?
Samuel: “Let’s go for a spin!”
“I wash everything on the gentle cycle. It’s much more humane.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Kindnesses And Good Deeds Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Hugh: Is the washing machine still running?
Bert: The washer can’t run. It doesn’t have legs.
Clothes dryer (klōz drī•yer), noun: An appliance that seems to eat socks, but which may actually be a portal that sends socks into another space-time dimension or a parallel universe from which they never return.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Daffynitions And Definitions Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Clothesline: A sun-and-wind-powered clothes dryer.
“You might think that your clothes are happiest when you are wearing them. But your clothes’ best memories might be of having gone for a spin in the washing machine and then the clothes dryer, enjoying some leisurely time relaxing in your dresser drawers, or just hanging around with the other clothes in your closet.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Beaumont’s Quotations By David Hugh Beaumont.
Jenny: What happened when the leopard went to the laundromat?
Jimmy: He came out spotless.
Linus: What is big, gray, and hard to spot?
Lynette: A stain-resistant elephant.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Elephants Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Joshua: What did the washer say to the dryer?
Samuel: “Let’s go for a spin!”
“I wash everything on the gentle cycle. It’s much more humane.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Kindnesses And Good Deeds Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Hugh: Is the washing machine still running?
Bert: The washer can’t run. It doesn’t have legs.
Clothes dryer (klōz drī•yer), noun: An appliance that seems to eat socks, but which may actually be a portal that sends socks into another space-time dimension or a parallel universe from which they never return.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Daffynitions And Definitions Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Clothesline: A sun-and-wind-powered clothes dryer.
“You might think that your clothes are happiest when you are wearing them. But your clothes’ best memories might be of having gone for a spin in the washing machine and then the clothes dryer, enjoying some leisurely time relaxing in your dresser drawers, or just hanging around with the other clothes in your closet.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Beaumont’s Quotations By David Hugh Beaumont.
Jenny: What happened when the leopard went to the laundromat?
Jimmy: He came out spotless.
Linus: What is big, gray, and hard to spot?
Lynette: A stain-resistant elephant.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Elephants Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Always Read the Label . . . One day, a teenager decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to his mother, “What setting do I use on the washing machine?” “It depends,” she replied. “What does it say on your shirt?” He yelled back, “Greendale High School.”
The most common invention of the 19th century was the washing machine. Between 1804 and 1873, at least 1,676 patents were issued by the United States Patent Office for various forms of the appliance.
They That Wash
They that wash on Monday
Have all the week to dry;
They that wash on Tuesday
Are not so much awry;
They that wash on Wednesday
Are not so much to blame;
They that wash on Thursday
Wash for shame;
They that wash on Friday
Wash in need;
They that wash on Saturday
Have lots of clothes indeed.
By Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Poems And Poetry Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Laddie: What did one sock say to the other sock in the clothes dryer?
Lassie: I’ll see you the next time around!
A historic moment in laundry: In 1949, the first unattended, 24-hour self-service laundromat ever in the United States of America was opened by Nelson Puett on North Loop in Austin, Texas.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read History Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
I·ro·ny (ꞌī-rǝ-nē), adjective: the opposite of wrinkly.
Missy: What happened when the wolf went to the laundromat?
Misty: He became a wash and werewolf.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Monsters Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
The most common invention of the 19th century was the washing machine. Between 1804 and 1873, at least 1,676 patents were issued by the United States Patent Office for various forms of the appliance.
They That Wash
They that wash on Monday
Have all the week to dry;
They that wash on Tuesday
Are not so much awry;
They that wash on Wednesday
Are not so much to blame;
They that wash on Thursday
Wash for shame;
They that wash on Friday
Wash in need;
They that wash on Saturday
Have lots of clothes indeed.
By Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Poems And Poetry Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Laddie: What did one sock say to the other sock in the clothes dryer?
Lassie: I’ll see you the next time around!
A historic moment in laundry: In 1949, the first unattended, 24-hour self-service laundromat ever in the United States of America was opened by Nelson Puett on North Loop in Austin, Texas.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read History Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
I·ro·ny (ꞌī-rǝ-nē), adjective: the opposite of wrinkly.
Missy: What happened when the wolf went to the laundromat?
Misty: He became a wash and werewolf.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Monsters Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
“Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes and come out wrinkle-free and two sizes smaller?” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Anatomy And Physiology Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
The Basic Rules For Clotheslines
- Wash the clotheslines before hanging any clothes - walk the entire length of each line while pulling a damp cloth wrapped around the lines.
- Hang the clothes in the right order, following the instinctual method implanted in your head.
- Never hang a shirt by the shoulders, always by the tail. Otherwise, what would the neighbors think?
- Wash day is Monday. Never hang clothes on the Weekend, or Sunday!
- Hang the sheets and towels on the outside lines so that you can hide your faded, raggedy work clothes in the middle, out of sight of everybody.
- Remember, even in subzero weather, clothes will ‘freeze-dry.’
- Always gather the clothes pins when taking down dry clothes! Pins left on the lines are ‘tacky.’
- If you are efficient, line up the clothes so that each item does not need two clothes pins, but shares one of the clothes pins with the next article on the clothesline.
- Clothes must be off of the line before dinner time, neatly folded in the clothes basket, and ready to be ironed.
- Ironed?! Well, that’s an entirely different topic!
Hamper: A container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothes.
Mount Wash More: What to name that pile of dirty laundry.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Mountains And Hills Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Here’s a tip for cheapskates or folks who live in the great outdoors. You may not want to hang your wet clothes to dry on tree branches or rocks, because they could be dirty or covered with debris. Carry a long piece of string with you. Double it, or fold it in half lengthwise, and then give it a few twists lengthwise. Tie each end to something, such as a tree branch. After your clothes are soaked by rain or after hand washing your clothes in the river or a container, simply insert your clothes anywhere in your string ‘clothes line’ between the twists, which will hold your garments securely in place against breezes and gravity. Clothes pins will be completely unnecessary.
Overheard: It’s laundry day, so I’m taking all my dirty garments down by the river to beat them on a rock.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Anatomy And Physiology Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
The Basic Rules For Clotheslines
- Wash the clotheslines before hanging any clothes - walk the entire length of each line while pulling a damp cloth wrapped around the lines.
- Hang the clothes in the right order, following the instinctual method implanted in your head.
- Never hang a shirt by the shoulders, always by the tail. Otherwise, what would the neighbors think?
- Wash day is Monday. Never hang clothes on the Weekend, or Sunday!
- Hang the sheets and towels on the outside lines so that you can hide your faded, raggedy work clothes in the middle, out of sight of everybody.
- Remember, even in subzero weather, clothes will ‘freeze-dry.’
- Always gather the clothes pins when taking down dry clothes! Pins left on the lines are ‘tacky.’
- If you are efficient, line up the clothes so that each item does not need two clothes pins, but shares one of the clothes pins with the next article on the clothesline.
- Clothes must be off of the line before dinner time, neatly folded in the clothes basket, and ready to be ironed.
- Ironed?! Well, that’s an entirely different topic!
Hamper: A container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothes.
Mount Wash More: What to name that pile of dirty laundry.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Mountains And Hills Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Here’s a tip for cheapskates or folks who live in the great outdoors. You may not want to hang your wet clothes to dry on tree branches or rocks, because they could be dirty or covered with debris. Carry a long piece of string with you. Double it, or fold it in half lengthwise, and then give it a few twists lengthwise. Tie each end to something, such as a tree branch. After your clothes are soaked by rain or after hand washing your clothes in the river or a container, simply insert your clothes anywhere in your string ‘clothes line’ between the twists, which will hold your garments securely in place against breezes and gravity. Clothes pins will be completely unnecessary.
Overheard: It’s laundry day, so I’m taking all my dirty garments down by the river to beat them on a rock.
Clothes dried outside on clotheslines smell better because of a process called ‘photolysis’ in which sunlight breaks down compounds that cause odor.
“They earned a precarious living by taking in one another’s washing.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Employment And Work Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
“Our laundry has just sent back some buttons with no shirt on them.” -Author Unknown
Paul: Which American state has the most laundry to do?
Harvey: Washington.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Geography Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Maude: What should never be aired in public?
Blanche: Dirty laundry.
Considering all the lint in the dryer, if we keep drying our clothes, could they eventually just disappear?
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Questions And Queries Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Never Judge Your Neighbor’s Laundry Skills . . . A young couple moved into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbor hanging laundry outside. “That laundry is not very clean,” she said. “She doesn’t know how to wash. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap.” Her husband looked on but remained silent. Every time her neighbor would hang her laundry to dry, the young woman would make the same comments. About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, “Look, she has learned how to wash. I wonder how that happened?” The husband said, “I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.”
“Give me a laundry list and I’ll set it to music.” -Giocchino Rossini (Gioacchini Antonio Rossini (1792 - 1868))
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Music Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
“They earned a precarious living by taking in one another’s washing.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Employment And Work Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
“Our laundry has just sent back some buttons with no shirt on them.” -Author Unknown
Paul: Which American state has the most laundry to do?
Harvey: Washington.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Geography Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Maude: What should never be aired in public?
Blanche: Dirty laundry.
Considering all the lint in the dryer, if we keep drying our clothes, could they eventually just disappear?
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Questions And Queries Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Never Judge Your Neighbor’s Laundry Skills . . . A young couple moved into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they were eating breakfast, the young woman saw her neighbor hanging laundry outside. “That laundry is not very clean,” she said. “She doesn’t know how to wash. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap.” Her husband looked on but remained silent. Every time her neighbor would hang her laundry to dry, the young woman would make the same comments. About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, “Look, she has learned how to wash. I wonder how that happened?” The husband said, “I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.”
“Give me a laundry list and I’ll set it to music.” -Giocchino Rossini (Gioacchini Antonio Rossini (1792 - 1868))
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Music Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
This Is The Way We Wash Our Clothes
This is the way we wash our clothes,
Rub-a-dub-dub, rub-a-dub-dub;
See them getting clean and white,
Rub-a-dub-dub, rub-a-dub-dub;
This is the way we hang them out,
Flippity-flap, flippity-flap;
See them blowing in the wind,
Flippity-flap, flippity-flap;
This is the way we iron them flat,
Smooth as can be, smooth as can be;
Soon our wash day will be done,
And nice clean clothes for you and me.
By Author Unknown: can be sung to the same tune as that of the song, “Here We Go ’Round the Mulberry Bush”
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of this article, or click or tap on these words to visit the Silly Songs Page.
This is the way we wash our clothes,
Rub-a-dub-dub, rub-a-dub-dub;
See them getting clean and white,
Rub-a-dub-dub, rub-a-dub-dub;
This is the way we hang them out,
Flippity-flap, flippity-flap;
See them blowing in the wind,
Flippity-flap, flippity-flap;
This is the way we iron them flat,
Smooth as can be, smooth as can be;
Soon our wash day will be done,
And nice clean clothes for you and me.
By Author Unknown: can be sung to the same tune as that of the song, “Here We Go ’Round the Mulberry Bush”
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of this article, or click or tap on these words to visit the Silly Songs Page.
Diane: What is loads and loads of fun?
Mandy: Laundry!
Jeb: Do you know any laundry jokes?
Ben: I have loads of them!
“Every laundry pile is conquered one load at a time.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Inspiration And Motivation Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Laundry, noun: 1. Clothes and linens in need of washing or that have been newly washed. 2. A room in a house, hotel, or other building in which clothes and linens can be washed, dried, ironed, folded, and so forth.
George: What do you call doing 6,000 pounds of laundry?
Martha: Washing tons!
A large-mouthed plastic bottle can be a washing machine. Simply fill it with water, detergent or soap, and an article of clothing. Put the lid on tight, and shake and shake the bottle. Pour out the sudsy water, pour in some new water, recap the bottle, and shake some more. Repeat as necessary to remove suds, then remove the article of clothing, squeeze or ring out the water if desired, and hang it on a clothesline to dry.
Mandy: Laundry!
Jeb: Do you know any laundry jokes?
Ben: I have loads of them!
“Every laundry pile is conquered one load at a time.” -Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Inspiration And Motivation Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
Laundry, noun: 1. Clothes and linens in need of washing or that have been newly washed. 2. A room in a house, hotel, or other building in which clothes and linens can be washed, dried, ironed, folded, and so forth.
George: What do you call doing 6,000 pounds of laundry?
Martha: Washing tons!
A large-mouthed plastic bottle can be a washing machine. Simply fill it with water, detergent or soap, and an article of clothing. Put the lid on tight, and shake and shake the bottle. Pour out the sudsy water, pour in some new water, recap the bottle, and shake some more. Repeat as necessary to remove suds, then remove the article of clothing, squeeze or ring out the water if desired, and hang it on a clothesline to dry.
National Laundry Day is observed on 15 April in the United States of America, to remind each one of us of the importance of laundry in our lives. Best regards to all on this day, and may you enjoy peace, happiness, and clean laundry.
“The consciousness of clean linen is in and of itself a source of moral strength, second only to that of a clean conscience. A well-ironed collar or a fresh glove has carried many a man through an emergency in which a wrinkle or a rip would have defeated him.” -Elizabeth Stuart Phelps: as quoted in Orison Swett Marden: “Pushing to the Front” (1894), chapter XV: ‘What a Good Appearance Will Do’
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Clothes.
Clothes, who?
Clothes the lid or the washing machine won’t start!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Knock-Knock Jokes Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
We are MFOL! . . . and lately we have become picky about lint . . .
“The consciousness of clean linen is in and of itself a source of moral strength, second only to that of a clean conscience. A well-ironed collar or a fresh glove has carried many a man through an emergency in which a wrinkle or a rip would have defeated him.” -Elizabeth Stuart Phelps: as quoted in Orison Swett Marden: “Pushing to the Front” (1894), chapter XV: ‘What a Good Appearance Will Do’
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Clothes.
Clothes, who?
Clothes the lid or the washing machine won’t start!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read Knock-Knock Jokes Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
We are MFOL! . . . and lately we have become picky about lint . . .
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