“I was brought up in a very poor and very violent household. I spent much of my childhood being afraid.” -Patrick Stewart (born 1940)
“Children have a certain amount of natural resiliency, which is the ability to withstand and recover from small emotional and physical injuries that have been inflicted upon them. Abused children have often lost that resiliency because what happened to them was extremely severe, and usually repeated daily over a period of years. They have been psychologically broken by their abusers. Typically, this loss of resiliency is carried into adulthood. The question is, how can abused children and adult survivors of child abuse regain their resiliency so that they can live without every small injury causing them to reel back and withdraw from life?” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” -Frederick Douglass (pseudonym of Frederick Augustus Washington Bailey (1817 - 1895))
“Child abuse casts a shadow the length of a lifetime.” -Herbert Ward
“Wounded children have a rage, a sense of failed justice, that burns in their souls. What do they do with that rage? Since they would never harm another, they turn that rage inward. They become the target of their own rage. They repeat in their thoughts the same harmful words that were spoken to them. They must lash out, but the only ones weak enough to attack are themselves.” -Woody Haiken
“There’s no excuse for child abuse.” -Author Unknown
“Childhood should be carefree, playing in the sun, not living a nightmare in the darkness of the soul.” -Dave Pelzer: “A Child Called It” (1995); type of work: autobiography; author’s website www.davepelzer.com.
“Abuse of any one generally shows that he has marked traits of character. The stupid and indifferent are passed by in silence.” -Tryon Edwards (1809 - 1894): as quoted in Tryon Edwards, editor: “A Dictionary of Thoughts: Being a Cyclopedia of Laconic Quotations from the Best Authors of the World, Both Ancient and Modern” (1891), page 2
“The scars you can’t see are the hardest to heal.” -Astrid Alauda (pseudonym of Terri Guillemets (born 1973))
“Treat yourself with care, compassion, acceptance, and respect, like you would a best friend, and celebrate the precious person that you are!” -Author Unknown
“Life can be wonderful at times. Life can also be extremely harsh, and to stand up against its harshness requires that we have substantial outer and inner defenses. Throughout your lifetime, you will encounter people who are abusive, overly critical, hostile, and even a threat to your physical well-being. Every one of us without exception will experience these things. Ours is a world of giving and taking offense, as individuals and groups with differing ideas meet. So, given this reality, how do we make life wonderful? How do we become stronger?” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“Parentage is a very important profession, but no test of fitness for it is ever imposed in the interest of the children.” -George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)
“Children need role models more than they need critics.” -Joseph Joubert (1754 - 1824): “Collected Thoughts of Mr. Joubert” (published posthumously in 1838)
“If there are things you don’t like in the world you grew up in, make your own life different.” -Dave Thomas (Rex David ‘Dave’ Thomas (1932 - 2002))
“The hearts of small children are delicate organs. A cruel beginning in this world can twist them into curious shapes. The heart of a hurt child can shrink so that forever afterward it is hard and pitted as the seed of a peach. Or, again, the heart of such a child may fester and swell until it is misery to carry within the body, easily chafed and hurt by the most ordinary things.” -Carson Smith McCullers (1917 - 1967): “The Ballad of the Sad Café” (1951)
“Once I got over my anger and rage from childhood, once I stopped feeling like a victim, I was able to open myself to great resources of learning.” -Georges Saint-Pierre
“Whether to forgive or to not forgive is something for you alone to decide, and not for someone else to command you to do. However, when it comes to whether to forget or to not forget, the choice to not forget means that you remember what happened and you will not allow abuse to be part of your life ever again - not against you or against anyone else, you will not allow yourself or anyone else to be an abuser or a victim, ever.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“What we remember from childhood we remember forever - permanent ghosts, stamped, inked, imprinted, eternally seen.” -Cynthia Ozick
Sticks and stones may beak my bones
but words can also hurt me.
Stones and sticks break only skin,
while words are ghosts that haunt me.
Slant and curved the word-swords fall
to pierce and stick inside me.
Bats and bricks may ache through bones
but words can mortify me.
Pain from words has left its scar
on mind and heart that’s tender.
Cuts and bruises now have healed
it’s words that I remember.
by Author Unknown
“The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.” -Max Lerner (1902 - 1992): “The Unfinished Country” (1959)
“There are no illegitimate children, only illegitimate parents.” -Léon R. Yankwich (1888 - 1975): as quoted in the “Los Angeles Times” (9 August 1928) newspaper
Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865) was a survivor of child abuse. Yet despite getting off to a rough start in life, he went on to achieve greatness, freeing those held as slaves, and bringing the United States of America back together again as one nation that had been divided by the American Civil War.
“Spare the rod and spoil the child.” -Author Unknown: “The Bible,” ‘Book of Proverbs,’ chapter 13, verse 24
“Explanation: The scripture does not mean to beat a child with a rod as some folks might wildly imagine, but to guide a child with a rod, as a shepherd guides sheep down the right path by blocking a wrong path with a rod (also called a staff; a long heavy stick). Spoil means ‘to harm the character of someone by over-indulgence.’ A modern interpretation of the scripture might be, “If you do not use proper guidance and loving discipline, you ruin a child’s development.” Remember, it is a harsh shepherd who beats sheep with a rod, and an irresponsible one who lets sheep wander away from the flock in all directions to where the wolves will prey upon them.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well.” -Martin Luther (1483 - 1546)
April of each year is Child Abuse Prevention Month.
“You can find the happiness you never knew as a child. First, though, you may have to go through a long period of trying to find out what happiness is, because you may not yet know, possibly having not really experienced it for sure. Take many looks around you until you solve the mystery of what it is.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“Most American children suffer from too much mother and too little father.” -Gloria Steinem (born 1934): as quoted in the “New York Times” (26 August 1971)
“The popular idea that a child forgets easily is not an accurate one. Many people go right through life in the grip of an idea which has been impressed on them in very tender years.” -Agatha Christie (Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie (1890 - 1976))
Types of Child Abuse
- Emotional abuse.
- Mental abuse.
- Munchausen’s by Proxy
- Neglectful abuse.
- Physical abuse.
- Can you think of other types of child abuse?
“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.” -John Trainer
“People who belittle and demean you, criticize and insult you, pick you apart and judge you, are the most negative and toxic people alive. Then when you stand up for yourself, they try to tell others that you are the ‘toxic’ one. They say this because they cannot stand it when you no longer allow them to run all over you and treat you like trash. They cannot admit their own horrible behavior, so they try to make it look like it is all your fault.” -Author Unknown
“Children exposed to violence in their family show the same pattern of activity in their brains as soldiers exposed to combat.” -Author Unknown
I Do Not Know Who I Am
I try to look inside but who do I see,
I see a shell that is supposed to have been Me,
I was not able to Grow,
I was not able to See,
I was not able to be Free,
A prison of Pain and a Wall of Hurt,
I feel like I should Be Living in Dirt,
But I am not going to let You Stop Me,
You will not see the Pain You brought Me,
One Day, I will truly be Me.
by Author Unknown
“Let’s raise children who won’t have to recover from their childhoods.” -Pam Lee
“Many survivors blame themselves for the abuse and continue to feel responsible and guilty for anything bad that happens to them or to other people they know. Survivors often feel bad about themselves and different from other people. They therefore isolate themselves from other people and avoid making close friendships.” -Carolyn Ainscough and Kay Toon: “Breaking Free” (2000)
“You can spend a lifetime trying to forget a few minutes of your childhood.” -Author Unknown
“The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice.” -Peggy O’Mara
“Unhappiness in a child accumulates because he sees no end to the dark tunnel.” -Graham Greene (Henry Graham ‘Graham’ Greene (1904 - 1991))
“Words are more powerful than perhaps anyone suspects, and once deeply engraved in a child’s mind, they are not easily eradicated.” -May Sarton (pseudonym of Eleanore Marie Sarton (1912 - 1995))
“Don’t judge yourself by what others did to you.” -C. Kennedy
“There is hope for all survivors of child abuse to heal and to lead well-rounded, fulfilling lives. We can know true joy, happiness, and satisfaction in our lives, and come to know anger, sadness, and other emotions to a more balanced degree. We can hold jobs, develop careers, marry, raise healthy children, and participate in society. We can laugh, sing, dance, love, like, and be what we were always meant to be . . . full-fledged human beings . . . we are, after all, members of the most amazing species in the known Universe, with unlimited potential, in a world of endless possibilities.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
“Children should be seen and heard and believed.” -Author Unknown
This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . imagine a much nicer world . . .