Imagine being so severely abused as a child that it effects your interactions with people for the rest of your life. You are fearful, shy, anxious, and so forth, with every person you encounter. People may think that you are weird and a bad person because you respond to them with distrust, defensiveness, nervousness, and more. You may have difficulty making eye contact and you may sweat heavily during encounters with other people, or you may have other uncomfortable responses. Even after repeated interactions with an individual, your ability to deal with him or her may not improve, and could become worse at times. You have difficulty trusting people, and you may make human interactions as brief and infrequent as you can. But you are not weird or bad - the person or persons who abused you when you were a child are the weird and bad people. Yet it is you who may pay the price for the rest of your life for having been abused as a child.
You were a normal human child, subjected to abuse, and it changed you. You were changed into a creature of fears and anxieties and shyness and more, against your will, during your formative childhood years, and the effects on your mind can last your entire lifetime, making human relationships difficult or impossible. It hurt then and it hurts now. You were traumatized. It wasn’t just your personality that was changed, but quite possibly your physical brain structure and nervous system as well. Scars and physical disfigurement are not unknown.
Healing or changing after child abuse is like trying to put a broken thing back together again and expecting it to be as it was before it was broken - a near-impossibility if done without skill, and the cracks and missing parts will always show if the repair is done in the wrong way.
Psychiatry and psychology and religion can damage child abuse survivors. Experts and professionals in those fields insist that they can help, but they nearly always end up hurting people even more. They can see you as weird, a bad person, paranoid, a sinner, immoral, or otherwise inferior, rather than understanding you as a traumatized person desperately in need of a chance for healing which may require many years. Even worse, they will place you in the same category as their other patients or clients, including psychopaths, schizophrenics, sociopaths, obsessive-compulsives, and criminally insane people. You may be none of those things, and the treatments used for those types of people are unlikely to help you and may harm you. They will want to stuff you full of pills and injections. They will put you in talk groups with people who will hurt you emotionally and possibly in other ways as well. Often the talk groups will be made up of the very same type of people who abused you and hurt you as a child.
Always remember this: It is not you who have failed to benefit from psychiatry, psychology, religion, and other so-called do-gooder systems. Instead, it is these do-gooders and their systems that have failed to understand you and countless others like you, because they do not want to understand you. They will deliberately and callously put you into the wrong category so they can use you for financial gain or other benefits to themselves and their do-gooder systems. May God help us all.
People abused during childhood can improve, but only with help that is designed specifically for people in their circumstances. One of the critical things they need is to be allowed to be in surroundings that are free from weird and scary and bad people and wrong treatment methods, so that they can begin to get better, grow stronger, and become full-fledged human beings and not merely bundles of pain and fear and misery. People who were abused as children need to be around normal, healthy, well-adjusted people continuously for a period of years in order to begin to improve. Dehumanizing institutions and harsh, cruel programs of treatment are not beneficial to anyone. Where and how to obtain real help is unknown to most people who were abused as children.
My name is David Hugh Beaumont. I was severely abused as a child, and this article is an opinion piece written by myself. Like many people who were abused as children and somehow survived to adulthood, I find that I must deal with my circumstances on my own. After a lifetime of seeking help, I have come to the realization that no real help exists for myself and countless others like myself. We walk alone on a difficult journey that we would like to be able to call life, but which in the end, is nothing but survival from one immensely difficult day to the next. The best we can hope for is to find some tiny thing like a joke or funny picture to try to laugh about for half a second. Some help exists as humor.
Will future generations find lasting solutions?
by David Hugh Beaumont
David Hugh Beaumont was born in 1966 in the United States of America. He is a website content creator, a writer, a researcher, and an editor.
Please note that the image shown in this article is an illustrative portrayal only of child abuse and not an image of an actual specific instance of child abuse.