Make Fun Of Life!

The Great Clock

10/31/2019

The Great Clock

The clock of life is wound but once,
     And no man has the power
To tell just when the hand will stop.
     At late or early hour.

Now is the only time you own;
     Live, love, toil with a will,
Plan no faith in tomorrow for
     The clock may then be still.

Wear today a cheerful face
     In everything you do.
The sunshine that you radiate
     Will shine right back at you.

Speak today a word of hope
     To someone in distress;
When you lift another’s load
     You make your burdens less.

Do today a gracious deed
     And do it with a smile;
It’s little daily acts like these
     That make your life worthwhile.

by Author Unknown

Mornings and Dawns

10/24/2019

This is the tower . . . you are cleared for takeoff . . .

“There is a close connection between getting up in the world and getting up in the morning.” -Author Unknown

“Each dawn is a new beginning.” -Author Unknown

Sunrise

A sunrise is
     a lovely way
          to begin a day.

by David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

“If you get up in the morning, you’re a morning person.” -Author Unknown

Getting Up

When I get up in the morning
     I’ll tell you what I do
I wash my hands and wash my face
     Splishety-splash, splishety-splash
I clean my teeth till they’re shining white
     Scrubbity-scrub, scrubbity-scrub
Then I put on my clothes and brush my hair
     And runnity-run, I run downstairs.

by Author Unknown

“I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.” -E. B. White (Elwyn Brooks White (1899 - 1985))

Al: Good morning.
Fred: And a great morning to you!

“Start the day with a joke . . . because there’s no better way!” -Author Unknown

Sunrise

This
     is the only gold
          I’ll ever possess . . .

I treasure it,
     counting its glory
          each dawn.

by Pollyanna Sedziol (Pollyanna Rogers ‘Polly’ Sedziol (born 1935))

“One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” -Author Unknown

“He who every morning plans the transactions of the day and follows out that plan carries a thread that will guide him through the labyrinth of the most busy life. The orderly arrangement of his time is a like a ray of life which darts itself through all his occupations. But where no plan is laid, where the disposal of time is surrendered merely to the chance of incident, chaos will soon reign.” -Victor Hugo (Victor Marie Hugo (1802 - 1885))

Good Morning Mr. Sun

Good morning Mr. Sun
     Our day has just begun
We love to see your shining face
     Good morning Mr. Sun

by Author Unknown

“The morning is the rudder of the day.” -Author Unknown

“I awaken in the morning with confidence, rejoicing in whatever work is given to me to do. Whatever that work is, I do it, not in order to earn a living or in a sense of performing an onerous duty; but, with joy and gladness, I let it unfold as the activity of God’s expression through me.” -Joel S. Goldsmith (Joel Solomon Goldsmith (1892 - 1964))

“Lose an hour in the morning, and you will spend all day looking for it.” -Richard Whately (1787 - 1863)

“Dawn begins at midnight.” -Author Unknown

“Do not shorten the morning by getting up late; look upon it as the quintessence of life, as to a certain extent sacred.” -Arthur Schopenhauer (1788 - 1860): “The Wisdom of Life and Counsels and Maxims” (originally published 1851; as translated by T. Bailey Saunders (June 1890)), chapter 2

A crowing rooster tells all the barnyard, “It’s time to get up, you sleepyheads!”

“Those who do not get up in the mornings to work diligently at the business of life are fated to forever mourn over a lifetime of lost mornings.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

Mick: Top of the morning to you!
Mack: And the rest of the day to yourself!

“Don’t start your day with the broken pieces of yesterday. Every day is a fresh start. Each day is a new beginning. Every morning we wake up is the first day of our new life.” -Author Unknown

“Be pleasant until ten o’clock in the morning and the rest of the day will take care of itself.” -Elbert Hubbard (Elbert Green Hubbard (1856 - 1915))

“We must take great care never to do anything before having said our morning prayers . . . The Devil once declared that if he could have the first moment of the day, he was sure of all the rest.” -John Vianney (Jean-Baptiste-Marie Vianney (1786 - 1859))

“Invest the first hour of the day, the ‘Golden Hour,’ in yourself.” -Brian Tracy (born 1944)

The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.
     Don’t go back to sleep.
You must ask for what you really want.
     Don’t go back to sleep.
People are going back and forth across the doorsill
     Where two worlds touch.
The door is round and open.
     Don’t go back to sleep.
-Rumi (Jalāl ad-Dīn Rūmī (C.E. 1207 - C.E. 1273))

Do you have trouble getting out of bed in the morning? A High Voltage Ejector Bed (HVEB) can help you get up and be on your way. Each bed is fully equipped with dual pneumatic pistons, electric shockers, alarm bell, and flashing light.

“If you once turn on your side after the hour at which you ought to rise, it is all over. Bolt up at once!” -Walter Scott (1771 - 1832): “Diary” (2 March 1826)

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Morning Windows

The brightest thing a house can do,
     When morning fills the skies,
Is just to catch the sun’s first rays,
     And flash the brilliant prize.

No eighty-candle lights within
     Can match the dazzling sight,
And every window-pane becomes
     A fusillade of light!

Thus, thus it is when households kneel
     In humble morning prayer.
The very Sun of Righteousness
     Is caught and captured there:

And all the day, in all its ways,
     However dull they be,
The happy windows of that home
     Are scintillant to see!

by Author Unknown

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“The difference between rising at five and seven o’clock in the morning, for the space of forty years, supposing a man to go to bed at the same hour at night, is nearly equivalent to the addition of ten years to a man’s life.” -Philip Doddridge (1702 - 1751): as quoted in W. J. and J. Richardson: “The Works of Philip Doddridge” (1804), volume 1

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” -Marcus Aurelius (also known as Marcus Aurelius Antoninus Augustus (C.E. 121 - C.E. 180))

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Oh, What a Beautiful Mornin’

Oh, what a beautiful mornin’,
     Oh, what a beautiful day,
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
     Everything’s going my way.

There’s a bright golden haze on the meadow,
     There’s a bright golden haze on the meadow,
The corn is as high as an elephants’ eye,
     And it looks like it’s climbing right up to the sky.

Oh, what a beautiful morning,
     Oh, what a beautiful day,
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
     Ev’rything’s going my way.

by Oscar Hammerstein II (1895 - 1960): “Oh, What a Beautiful Mornin’” (1943) as presented in the musical “Oklahoma”

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“You’ve got to get up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction.” -John Graham: letter (10 April 189-) to his son Pierrepont, as quoted in George Lorimer (George Horace Lorimer (1867 - 1937)), editor: “Letters from a Self-Made Merchant to His Son” (1902)

Good Morning Song

Oh, the duck says, “Quack,”
and the cow says, “Moo,”
the old red rooster says,
“Cock-a-doodle-doo!”
The sheep says, “Baa,”
and the cat says, “Meow,”
but I say, “Good Morning!”
when I see you.

by Author Unknown

It is the dawn of a new day at MFOL! . . . wait, somebody has just said that we have to wait until morning to be able to say that . . .

Our Greatest Benefactor

10/22/2019

Our Greatest Benefactor

We all think of time as our enemy . . . how foolish! For in reality, time is not our enemy but our friend. It is an anodyne for our suffering. It is a philosopher’s staff on which to lean. It is the magic that lifts the crushing burden from our shoulders and makes smooth the rough places in life.

To women, time is kinder than they think. It offers itself to them as an ally instead of an adversary if they will meet it in the right spirit, and if it takes from them the fleeting beauty of youth, it will give them instead a charm that will never fade. For no women are so fascinating as those whom age and experience have ripened and perfected and given sophistication and taught every art of pleasing. And age gives beauty to many women who never had it in their youth . . . Many an old woman’s face is luminous with the goodness of her soul that shines through like light through an alabaster vase.

Time is the greatest solver of all our problems, if only we had intelligence enough to trust it. We lie awake at night and worry over our difficulties, wondering, if this or that contingency happened, what should be the best way to act. How much anxiety we might spare ourselves, if we would lay our problems on the knees of time. For when the hour comes, we find that time has solved it all and our course is perfectly obvious.

Time is the strengthener. Sometimes we are confronted with conditions that turn our souls sick. Sometimes the tasks appointed seem more onerous than we can perform. At first our courage ebbs . . . Then time begins to blur the harsh outlines of our background, to strengthen our backs to bear the burdens, and to breathe into us new hope and spirit.

Time brings with it the blessing of forgetfulness. It turns the memory of hardships into piquant reminiscences. It makes our mistakes something to laugh over, and makes our fellow creatures condone our transgressions because they were committed so long ago.

And time is the great peacemaker. Time robs old feuds of their enmity and old hatreds of their bitterness and makes us forgive those who have wronged us. Time teaches us how senseless it is to sour our own lives with a grudge.

Best of all, time is the great consoler. When we lose those we love, we feel that the sun has set for us. We find no cheer in anything, no interest. No words, sympathy, philosophy lighten our sorrow. Nothing can help but time. For it has been mercifully ordained that the wound must heal and the ache grows less poignant. Time brings us fresh interests, other joys, duties to other people, work that absorbs us, and so by degrees turns the grief into a sorrow that can be borne. Blessed be time that heals us.

by Dorothy Dix

Dorothy Dix is a pseudonym of Elizabeth Meriwether Gilmer, who was born on 18 November 1861 in Woodstock, Tennessee, United States of America. She became an advice columnists and a journalist. Elizabeth Meriwether Gilmer passed on at 90 years of age on 16 December 1951 in New Orleans, Louisiana, United States of America.

October’s Party

10/14/2019

October’s Party

October gave a party;
     The leaves by hundreds came -
The Chestnuts, Oaks, and Maples,
     And leaves of every name.
The Sunshine spread a carpet,
     And everything was grand,
Miss Weather led the dancing,
     Professor Wind the band.

The Chestnuts came in yellow,
     The Oaks in crimson dressed;
The lovely Misses Maple
     In scarlet looked their best;
All balanced to their partners,
     And gaily fluttered by;
The sight was like a rainbow
     New fallen from the sky.

Then, in the rustic hollow,
     At hide-and-seek they played,
The party closed at sundown,
     And everybody stayed.
Professor Wind played louder;
     They flew along the ground;
And then the party ended
     In jolly “hands around.”

by George Cooper

Today and the Present

10/14/2019

“Nothing is worth more than this day.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)

The Gift of a Day

Every day’s a perfect gift
     of time for us to use,
Hours waiting to be filled
     in any way we choose.
Each morning brings
     a quiet hope
That rises
    with the Sun.
Each evening brings
     the sweet content
That comes with work
    well done.

by Author Unknown

“Do something today that your future self will thank you for.” -Author Unknown

Today is your day!
     Your mountain is waiting,
          So . . . get on your way!
-Doctor Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel (1904 - 1991)): “Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” (1990)

“The living moment is everything.” -D. H. Lawrence (David Herbert Lawrence (1885 - 1930))

Garth: Do you know what today is?
Heath: No - what is it?
Garth: It is the day after yesterday!

“I held a moment in my hand, brilliant as a star, fragile as a flower, a tiny sliver of one hour. I dropped it carelessly, Ah! I didn’t know, I held opportunity.” -Hazel Lee (Hazel Crutcher Lee (1917 - 2006))

“What we do today, right now, will have an accumulated effect on all our tomorrows.” -Alexandra Stoddard (born 1941)

“Each day, and the living of it, has to be a conscious creation in which discipline and order are relieved with some play and pure foolishness.” -May Sarton (pseudonym of Eleanore Marie Sarton (1912 - 1995))

“Remember what was. Anticipate what will be. But live in the moment that lies in between.” -Author Unknown

“Unless each day can be looked back upon by an individual as one in which he has had some fun, some joy, some real satisfaction, that day is a loss.” -Dwight D. Eisenhower (Dwight David ‘Ike’ Eisenhower (1890 - 1969)): as quoted in Louis Filler: “The President Speaks: From William McKinley to Lyndon B. Johnson” (1964)

“Act in the precious present.” -Author Unknown

“The clock is running. Make the most of today. Time waits for no man. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it is called the present.” -Alice Morse Earle (1851 - 1911): “Sun Dials and Roses of Yesterday: Garden Delights Which Are Here Displayed in Very Truth and Are Morever Regarded As Emblems” (1902)

“Let today be the start of something new.” -Author Unknown

“Ask yourself if what you are doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow.” -Author Unknown

Today

Today is mine. It is unique.
Nobody in the world has one exactly like it.
It holds the sum of all my past experiences and all my future potentials.
I can fill it with joyous moments or ruin it with fruitless worry.
If painful recollections of the past come into my mind,
or frightening thoughts of the future, I can put them away.
They cannot spoil today for me.

by Author Unknown

“Today is a brand new day. My past does not define me. My future is mine to create.” -Author Unknown

“There is only one time that is important - now! It is the most important time because it is the only time that we have any power.” -Leo Tolstoy (Lev Nikolayevich Tolstoy (1828 - 1910))

“If not now, when will you begin living your life?” -Jack Borland

“The future depends on what we do in the present.” -Mohandas Karamchand ‘Mahatma’ Gandhi (1869 - 1948)

“On a day no different than the one now dawning, Leonardo drew the first strokes of the Mona Lisa, Shakespeare wrote the first words of Hamlet, Beethoven began work on his Ninth Symphony, and Einstein discovered the theory of relativity. What are you going to do today?” -Author Unknown

“If you haven’t found something strange during the day, it hasn’t been much of a day.” -John A. Wheeler (John Archibald Wheeler (1911 - 2008))

“Every day is a gift.” -Author Unknown

“The passing moment is all that we can be sure of; it is only common sense to extract its utmost value from it . . .” -W. Somerset Maugham (William Somerset Maugham (1874 -1965))

“Days are expensive. When you spend a day, you have one less day to spend. So make sure you spend each one wisely.” -Jim Rohn (Emanuel James ‘Jim’ Rohn (1930 - 2009))

“I think, what has this day brought me, and what have I given it?” -Henry Moore (1898 - 1986)

“This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” -Author Unknown: “The Holy Bible” (King James Version, Cambridge Edition (1769)), ‘Psalms,’ Psalm 118, verse 24

Live in the Present

One day at a time
this is enough.
Do not look back
and grieve over the past
for it is gone;
and do not be troubled
about the future
for it has not yet come.
Live in the present
and make it so beautiful
that it will be worth
remembering!

by Author Unknown

“Make the most of today. Translate your good intentions into actual deeds.” -Grenville Kleiser (1868 - 1953)

“If you are going to do something, do it now. Tomorrow is too late.” -Pete Goss (born 1961)

“No day passeth, without something we wish not.” -Thomas Fuller (1654 - 1734): “Gnomologia” (1732), number 3,558

“Never underestimate the value of a day.” -Author Unknown

“What very mysterious things days were. Sometimes they fly by, and other times they seem to last forever, yet they are all exactly twenty-four hours. There’s quite a lot we don’t know about them.” -Melanie Benjamin (pseudonym of Melanie Hauser (born 1962))

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.” -Karen Lamb (born 1956), website www.karenlamb.com

“Make good use of today.” -Author Unknown

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Today

Mend a quarrel. Search out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust. Write a love letter. Share some treasure. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in a word or deed.

Keep a promise. Find the time. Forego a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Listen. Apologize if you were wrong. Try to understand. Flout envy. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Appreciate, be kind, be gentle. Laugh a little more.

Deserve confidence. Take up arms against malice. Decry complacency. Express your gratitude. Worship your God. Gladden the heart of a child. Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the Earth. Speak your love. Speak it again. Speak it still again. Speak it still once again.

by Author Unknown

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“One today is worth two tomorrows.” -Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790): “The Way to Wealth” (1758)

“Today will never happen again. Don’t waste it with a false start or no start at all.” -Og Mandino (Augustine ‘Og’ Mandino II (1923 - 1996))

“One has to live in the present. Whatever is past is gone beyond recall; whatever is future remains beyond one’s reach, until it becomes present. Remembering the past and giving thought to the future are important, but only to the extent that they help one deal with the present.” -S. N. Goenka (Satya Narayan Goenka (1924 - 2013))

“Now is all there is.” -Author Unknown

“Day, noun: A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.” -Ambrose Bierce (Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce (1842 - 1914))

“Just for today let us live this one day only, forgetting yesterday and tomorrow, and not trying to solve the whole problem of life at once.” -Joseph F. Newton (Joseph Fort Newton (1878 - 1949))

“No time like the present.” -Mary de la Rivière Manley (also known as Delarivier Manley (1663 - 1724))

“Today is a perfect day to just be happy.” -Author Unknown

“You will never have this day again, so make it count.” -Author Unknown

“As long as the day lasts, let’s give it all we’ve got.” -David O. McKay (David Oman McKay (1873 - 1970))

“One must never be in haste to end a day. There are too few of them in a lifetime.” -Author Unknown

“The past was. Tomorrow may be. Only today is.” -Sonya Friedman

“Our days are like identical suitcases, all the same size, but some can pack into them twice as much as others.” -Author Unknown

“Today . . . spend more time with people who bring out the best in you, not the stress in you.” -Author Unknown

“The only thing even in this world are the number of hours in a day. The difference in winning or losing is what you do with those hours.” -Woody Hayes (Wayne Woodrow ‘Woody’ Hayes (1913 - 1987))

“Look closely at the present you are constructing: it should look like the future you are dreaming.” -Alice Walker (born 1944)

“Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow.” -Robert T. Kiyosaki (Robert Toru Kiyosaki (born 1947))

“Seize the day, trust as little as possible in tomorrow.” [English translation]
“Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero.” [original Latin]
-Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus (65 B.C.E. - 8 B.C.E.)): “Odes” (23 B.C.E.), book 1, number 11, final line

“There is no such thing in anyone’s life as an unimportant day.” -Alexander Woollcott (Alexander Humphreys Woollcott (1887 - 1943))

“Is it today yet?” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

“Right now counts forever.” -R. C. Sproul (Robert Charles Sproul (1939 - 2017)): title of article in “Tabletalk” (May 1977) magazine

“Think that this day will never dawn again.” -Dante Alighieri (about 1265 - 1321)

“There are many fine things which you mean to do some day, under what you think will be more favorable circumstances. But the only time that is surely yours is the present, hence this is the time to speak the word of appreciation and sympathy, to do the generous deed, to forgive the fault of a thoughtless friend, to sacrifice self a little more for others. Today is the day in which to express your noblest qualities of mind and heart, to do at least one worthy thing which you have long postponed, and to use your God-given abilities for the enrichment of some less fortunate fellow traveler. Today you can make your life big, broad, significant, and worthwhile. The present is yours to do with it as you will.” -Grenville Kleiser (1868 - 1953): “Inspiration and Ideals: Thoughts for Every Day” (1918), ‘August Twenty-Eighth’

“Now is the only time anything happens.” -Sylvia Boorstein (born 1936)

“Whether it’s the best of times or the worst of times, it’s the only time we’ve got.” -Art Buchwald (1925 - 2007): as quoted in “The Journal of the Oklahoma State Medical Association” (1979)

“The man who waits until tomorrow, misses the opportunities of today.” -Author Unknown

“What day is it?” asked Pooh.
“It’s today,” squeaked Piglet. “My favorite day.”
-A. A. Milne (Alan Alexander Milne (1882 - 1956)): “Winnie the Pooh” (14 October 1926)

“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” -Annie Dillard (born 1945 as Meta Ann Doak): “The Writing Life” (1989)

“What you do today can improve all your tomorrows.” -Ralph Marston (Ralph S. Marston, Junior (born 1955))

“Every man’s life lies within the present; for the past is spent and done with, and the future is uncertain.” -Marcus Aurelius (also known as Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (C.E. 121 - C.E. 180))

“There’s only now.” -Bill Murray (William James ‘Bill’ Murray (born in 1950))

This is MFOL! . . . encouraging you to go out today to make great memories . . .

September

9/4/2019

September

The golden-rod is yellow;
     The corn is turning brown;
The trees in apple orchards
     With fruit are bending down.

The gentian’s bluest fringes
     Are curling in the sun;
In dusty pods the milkweed
     Its hidden silk has spun.

The sedges flaunt their harvest,
     In every meadow nook;
And asters by the brook-side
     Make asters in the brook.

From dewy lanes at morning
     The grapes’ sweet odors rise;
At noon the roads all flutter
     With yellow butterflies.

By all these lovely tokens
     September days are here,
With Summer’s best of weather,
     And Autumn’s best of cheer.

But none of all this beauty
     Which floods the earth and air,
Is unto me the secret
     Which makes September fair.

’Tis a thing which I remember;
     To name it thrills me yet:
One day of one September
     I never can forget.

by Author Unknown

Time

8/31/2019

“If it weren’t for the last minute, a lot of things wouldn’t get done.” -Michael S. Traylor

Beverly: How is getting up at 4:00 a.m. like a pig’s tail?
Kimberly: It’s twirly!

“Time is eternity begun.” -James Montgomery (1771 - 1854): “A Mother’s Love,” stanza 8, line 6; type of work: poem

Jonah: How many seconds are in a year?
Jonas: Twelve, starting with the second (2nd) of January.

“It is astonishing what a lot of odd minutes one can catch during the day, if one really sets about it.” -Dinah Maria Craik (born Dinah Maria Mulock (1826 - 1887))

Late

How did it get so late so soon?
     It’s night before it’s afternoon.
December is here before it’s June.
     My goodness how the time has flewn.
How did it get so late so soon?

by Doctor Seuss (pseudonym of Theodor Seuss Geisel (1904 - 1991))

“Time is free, but it’s priceless. You can’t own it, but you can use it. You can’t keep it, but you can spend it. Once you’ve lost it, you can never get it back.” -Harvey Mackay (Harvey B. Mackay (born 1932))

“If I could have time in a bottle, I’d make it a glass bottle. That way, I could see the dinosaurs.” -Dick Bowden

Why do the hours drag on endlessly, while the years seem to fly past?

There Was a Man

There was a man who never was.
     This tragedy occurred because
His parents, being none too smart,
     Were born two hundred years apart.

by Dennis Lee

“Much may be done in those little shreds and patches of time which every day produces, and which most men throw away.” -C. C. Colton (Charles Caleb Colton (1780 - 1832))

“Counting time is not so important as making time count.” -James J. Walker

“If time be judiciously employed, there is time for everything.” -George Head (1782 - 1855): “A Home Tour Through the Manufacturing Districts of England in the Summer of 1835” (1836), page 198

In the time a person says, “One hundred and one,” one second of time has passed.

Bill: What time would it be if it were not the time it is now?
Tim: Some other time.

“Time devours all things.” [English translation]
“Tempus edax rerums.” [original Latin]
-Ovid (Publius Ovidius Naso (43 B.C.E. - C.E. 17))

“Time equals life; therefore, waste your time and waste of your life, or master your time and master your life.” -Alan Lakein (born 1938)

“If you don’t make time to work on creating the life you want, you’re eventually going to be forced to spend a lot of time dealing with a life you don’t want.” -Kevin Ngo

Seymour: What time is it?
Rosemary: Now.

“How you spend your hours equals who you are today.” -Stephen Bavolek (Stephen J. Bavolek)

In 1984, the “Eldorado Daily Journal” newspaper of Illinois, United States of America, announced a contest to see who could save the most daylight for daylight savings time. The rules of the contest were simple: beginning with the first day of daylight savings time, contestants would be required to save daylight. Whoever succeeded in saving the most daylight would win. Only pure daylight would be allowed - no dawn or twilight light, though light from cloudy days would be allowed. Moonlight was strictly forbidden. Light could be stored in any container. The contest received a huge nationwide response. The paper’s editor was interviewed by correspondents from television news shows and was featured in papers around the country.

“Time is God’s way of keeping everything from happening at once.” -Havelock Ellis (Henry Havelock Ellis (1859 - 1939))

Overheard: She’s always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower.

“By losing present time, we lose all time.” -W. Gurney Benham (William Gurney Benham (1859 - 1944))

Overheard: In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.

“Minutes are worth more than money. Spend them wisely.” -Thomas P. Murphy

“We all start out in life with one thing in common: we all have the same amount of time. It’s just a matter of what we do with it.” -Harvey B. Mackay (born 1932)

Chronophobia is a persistent fear of time. Perhaps at the root of this fear is yet another fear, a fear of having all of one’s most beautiful dreams going forever unrealized. Let’s do something about that today by getting started on dreams and goals and plans, even if only in the tiniest of ways, like writing them down on paper or typing them out on your computer, and re-reading them at the start of each day.

“Lost, yesterday, somewhere between sunrise and sunset, two golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes. No reward is offered, for they are gone forever.” -Horace Mann (1796 - 1859)

“A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life.” -Charles Darwin (Charles Robert Darwin (1809 - 1882))

Overheard: Just think, tomorrow at this same time, we will all be living exactly one day in the future . . .

“Lost time is never found again.” -John H. Aughey (John Hill Aughey (1828 - 1911))

Julianne: What time is it?
Julius: Early September in the year of our Lord 2021.

“The supply of time is a daily miracle. Each day twenty-four hours are given to us to do with as we wish. It is the most precious possession we have, so live it daily and take advantage of every opportunity.” -Author Unknown

Time Facts
- 60 seconds make up a minute.
- 60 minutes make up an hour.
- 24 hours make up a day.
- 7 days make up a week.
- 28 to 31 days make up a month.
- 12 months make up a year.
- 10 years make up a decade.
- 100 years make up a century.
- 1,000 years make up a millennium.
- An infinite number of years make up an eternity.

“Don’t say, ‘There’s still time,’ or ‘Maybe next time,’ because there’s also the concept of, ‘It’s too late.’” -Author Unknown

“Those who know the value of time use it in preparation for eternity.” -Dugnet (also variously attributed to Duguet and Dugnat)

“Time has no divisions to mark its passage, there is never a thunderstorm or blare of trumpets to announce the beginning of a new month or year. Even when a new century begins it is only we mortals who ring bells and fire off pistols.” -Thomas Mann (Paul ‘Thomas’ Mann (1875 - 1955)): “The Magic Mountain” (1924), Chapter 5

Riddle: What flies without wings?
Solution: Time.

“The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot.” -Michael Altshuler, website: http://michaelaltshuler.com

“All that really belongs to us is time; even he who has nothing else has that.” -Baltasar Gracián (1601 - 1658)

How to stop time: kiss.
How to travel in time: read.
How to escape time: music.
How to feel time: write.
How to release time: breathe.
by Matt Haig (born 1975)

“Each moment, as it passes, is the meeting place of two eternities.” -Madame Swetchine (Anne Sophie Swetchine (1782 - 1857))

“Our great object in time is not to waste our passions and gifts on the things external that we must leave behind, but that we cultivate within us all that we can carry into the eternal progress beyond.” -Edward Bulwer-Lytton (Edward George Earle Lytton Bulwer-Lytton (1803 - 1873))

“In reality, time does not exist, only processes.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

“Time revealeth all things.” -Thomas Draxe (unknown - 1618)

Candace: What time is it?
Wallace: $682.99.
Candace: Your prices are really high.
Wallace: That’s because time is really valuable.

“Time is like a snowflake - it melts away while we try to decide what to do with it.” -Author Unknown

May memory restore again and again
The smallest color of the smallest day:
Time is the school in which we learn,
Time is the fire in which we burn.
-Delmore Schwartz (1913 - 1966): “Calmly We Walk Through This April’s Day” (1937), also found in Delmore Schwartz: “For Rhoda” (1938), stanza 1

“Nothing is as far away as one minute ago.” -Jim Bishop

“The illimitable, silent, never-resting thing called Time, rolling, rushing on, swift, silent, like an all-embracing ocean-tide, on which we and all the Universe swim like exhalations, like apparitions which are, and then are not.” -Thomas Carlyle (1795 - 1881)

“The time on either side of now stands fast.” -Maxine Kumin

“When it’s three o’clock in New York, it’s still 1938 in London.” -Bette Midler (born 1945): as quoted in the “Jerusalem Post” (24 February 1989) newspaper

Have you ever noticed that when someone says there is no more time, time pays no attention to what that person says and continues to flow right along as usual?

“You wake up in the morning, and lo! your purse is magically filled with twenty-four hours of the magic tissue of the Universe of your life. No one can take it from you. No one receives either more or less than you receive. Waste your infinitely precious commodity as much as you will, and you cannot draw on the future. Impossible to get into debt. You can only waste the passing moment. You cannot waste tomorrow; it is kept for you.” -Arnold Bennett (Enoch Arnold Bennett (1867 - 1931))

“Time is not a reality, but a concept or a measure . . .” -Antiphon the Sophist (479 B.C.E. - 411 B.C.E.): “Truth”

“Time is not measured by clocks but by moments.” -Author Unknown

“Lost wealth may be replaced by industry, lost knowledge by study, lost health by temperance or medicine, but lost time is gone forever.” -Samuel Smiles (1812 - 1904)

More Time Facts
- According to the old English time system, a moment is one and a half minutes.
- A jiffy is an actual unit of time, equaling 1/100th of a second.
- A nanosecond is one billionth of a second.
- The smallest unit of time is a yoctosecond, or 1 septillionth of a second, being 10 to the power of negative 24.
- A million seconds is about 11 days.
- A billion seconds is about 31 years.
- 31,536,000 seconds is about one year.
- 168 hours are in a week.

“Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time.” -Jim Rohn (Emanuel James Rohn (1930 - 2009))

“Whether it’s the best of times or the worst of times, it’s the only time we’ve got.” -Art Buchwald (Arthur Buchwald (1925 - 2007))

“Time eases all things.” -Sophocles (496 B.C.E. - 406 B.C.E.)

“Time flies whether you’re having fun or not. The choice is yours.” -Author Unknown

“You will never have more time than you do right now.” -Author Unknown

Time Quiz
- What time is it?
- What time would you rather it be?
- Is it the same time for everybody?
- Does anybody really know what time it is?
- What is time?
- Do you have enough time?
- If you do not have enough time, where can you get some more?
- When people borrow some of your time, do they ever pay you back?

Tim: May I borrow some of your time?
Tom: Only if you promise to return it.

“You can’t make up for lost time. You can only do better in the future.” -Ashley Ormon (born 1958)

“We shall never have more time. We have, and have always had, all the time there is. No object is served in waiting until next week or even until tomorrow. Keep going day in and day out. Concentrate on something useful. Having decided to achieve a task, achieve it at all costs.” -Arnold Bennett (Enoch Arnold Bennett (1867 - 1931))

“God hath given to man a short time here upon Earth, and yet upon this short time eternity depends.” -Jeremy Taylor (1613 - 1667): “Holy Living” (1650)

“Time will explain it all.” -Euripides (480 B.C.E. - 406 B.C.E.)

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” -J. R. R. Tolkien (John Ronald Reuel Tolkien (1892 - 1973)): “The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring” (1954)

Wow, where did all the time go? Apparently, time flies when you are having fun! And, since that is all the time we have to cover the topic of Time, we will now go on to our next topic . . . on MFOL!

Clocks and Timepieces

8/30/2019

What time does the clock show?

Before clocks and watches were invented, people planned their days by the rising and setting of the Sun. We continue to use sunrise and sunset as the most obvious reference points in our days.

“The first and original clock or timepiece known to humankind is still all around us even now: the Earth, the Sun, the Moon, and the movements thereof, which creates our days and nights and tides and seasons.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

Sundials were invented more than 2,000 years ago and were among the first instruments used to tell the time. Small sundials, similar to the one built into the pocket compass shown above, were once very popular, and are still made and available for purchase even now. They require no batteries or winding.

Lessons from a Sundial

Ignore dull days; forget the showers;
Keep count of only shining hours.

by Author Unknown

After the invention of sundials came hourglasses. Though they do not show the time of day, they do allow people to know when a period of time is up, as the sand finishes pouring out of the top half of the glass into the bottom half. Hourglasses come in different time measures, such as 1 minute, 30 minutes, or 1 hour, and for specific purposes, such as egg timer hourglasses to time the cooking of hard-boiled eggs. Some hourglasses allow users to put in more sand or remove sand to let them to choose how much time will be measured. Hourglasses are even made that contain liquid rather than sand to mark the passage of time.

Sometime in the 1400’s, also referred to as the 15th century, mechanical clocks were invented. The pendulum clock was invented in 1656, and continued as the most accurate clock type until the 1930’s, when quartz oscillators were invented. Digital clocks and wristwatches, and most analog clocks, are now built with quartz oscillators. After World War 2, atomic clocks were invented, and are at present the most accurate timepieces.

To synchronize your computer’s clock with the atomic clock, said to be the world’s most reliable timepiece, visit http://www.worldtimeserver.com/atomic-clock.

Have you ever noticed that by the time you have finished synchronizing all of your clocks, watches, timers, appliances, and devices, it’s time to start all over again . . .

“Don’t watch the clock; do what it does: Keep going.” -Author Unknown

Before 1687, clocks were made with an hour hand only.

Why are the long thin moving parts on clock faces called hands and not fingers? After all, they are long and narrow like fingers, and they do sort of point at the numbers . . .

“Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?” -Steven Wright (Steven Alexander Wright (born 1955))

Raymond: What did the big hand say to the small hand on the clock?
Myra: “Can you spare a minute?”

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Clock Song

The hands on the clock
     Go round and round,
     Round and round, round and round.
The hands on the clock
     Go round and round,
     To tell us the time.

The short hand on the clock
     Goes from number to number,
     Number to number, number to number.
The short hand on the clock
     Goes from number to number.
     To tell us the time.

The long hand on the clock
     Goes around by fives,
     Around by fives, around by fives.
The long hand on the clock
     Goes around by fives.
     To tell us the minutes.

by Author Unknown: can be sung to the same tune as that of “Wheels on the Bus”

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“My watch is three hours fast and I can’t fix it, so I’m gonna move to New York.” -Steven Wright (Steven Alexander Wright (born 1955))

The wristwatch was invented in 1904 by Louis Cartier.

Overheard: Let’s all synchronize our watches.

“My poor fellow, why not carry a watch?” -Herbert Beerbohm Tree (1852 - 1917): comment made to a man in the street who was carrying a grandfather clock

Preston: How should you greet a grandfather clock?
Pierce: “Hello, old timer!”

Heloise: What did the digital watch say to the grandfather clock?
Louise: “Look Pops, no hands!”

“Timepiece: An indicator device of the progression of events relative one to another, though in itself holding no sway over them.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)

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The Sad Tale of Mr. Mears

There was a man who had a clock,
     His name was Matthew Mears;
And every day he wound that clock
     For eight and twenty years.

And then one day he found that clock
     An eight-day* clock to be;
And a madder man than Matthew Mears
     You would not wish to see.

by Author Unknown
*An eight-day clock is a clock that is wound once in every eight days.

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“You can’t turn back the clock but you can wind it up again.” -Author Unknown

Riddle: What runs but has no legs?
Solution: A clock.

Analog clocks and watches have hands that move around a dial, or clockface, and digital clocks and watches have numerical, or number, displays.

The tip of a 0.846666666667 centimeter (1/3 inch long) hour hand on an analog wristwatch travels at 0.000004425696 kilometers (0.00000275 miles) per hour. By comparison, the fastest-moving land snail, the common garden snail, has a speed of about 0.0503724672 kilometers (0.0313 miles) per hour. This must be the reason why so many pet snails are named Speedy, but so many wristwatches are named Old Reliable.

In many advertisements for analog watches, or watches with hands, the time shown is with the hands at 10 and 2 (the digital watch equivalent of 10:10), because the hand positions for this time are thought to subtly represent a smiling face in the minds of people who view the ads . . . and as we have been told, everybody likes a joyful timepiece.

Sign on a clock repair shop: Cuckoo Clocks Psychoanalyzed Here.

Olga: Why was the clock put in the tree?
Olaf: Because it was a little cuckoo.

Cuckoo clocks are not just for eccentric people anymore . . . but mostly they are. We are kidding - they are for anybody who wants one. You might need several of them, so that they keep each other company and do not get lonely . . . one for the kitchen, another for the living room, and one for the pack patio.

Cuckoo clock, noun: 1. A decorative clock with a little wooden bird inside it that comes out every hour and makes a two-note sound like a cuckoo.  2. A timepiece that drives some people crazy, or at the very least, to distraction.

Meanwhile, in a parallel Universe, a bird pops out of a cuckoo clock every hour and asks, “What time is it?!”

Clovis: What goes tick-tock, woof-woof?
Mavis: A watchdog.

“The clock talked loud. I threw it away, it scared me what it talked.” -Tillie Olsen: “Tell Me a Riddle” (1980)

Chronometrophobia is a persistent fear of clocks. Maybe it has something to do with that annoying tick, tick, tick, tick . . . or maybe it is the persistent bzzz-zzz or bbbrrrnnng or beep-beep-beep of the alarm . . . or the onward march of time . . .

Alarm clock, noun: 1. A device designed to scare the daylights out of you. 2. An electronic device used to wake up people who have no pets or children.

Rancher Rick: What do you get if you cross a clock and a chicken?
Farmer Fred: An alarm cluck.

Hickory, Dickory, Dock,

Three mice ran up the clock,
     The clock struck one and
That mouse hired a personal injury attorney
     And sued for assault-and-battery.

by Author Unknown

Riddle: What has a face but cannot talk?
Solution: A clock.

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The Clock

There’s a neat little clock, -
     In the schoolroom it stands, -
And it points to the time
     With its two little hands.

And may we, like the clock,
     Keep a face clean and bright,
With hands ever ready
     To do what is right.

by Author Unknown

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“Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.” -Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach (1830 - 1916)

Rudy: What do people do in clock factories?
Rudolph: They make faces all day.

Tick Tock

Tick, tock, tick, tock,
     Merrily sings the clock.
It’s time for work,
     It’s time for play,
And so it sings
     Through all the day.
Tick, tock, tick, tock,
     Merrily sings the clock.

by Author Unknown

This is MFOL! . . . and the clock is telling us it is time to get started on what is coming up next . . .

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