Halloween

12/22/2018

Halloween

I’m not afraid on Halloween
     Because my Mother said
I should not fear those funny things
     But laugh at them instead.

For orange faces in the night
     That stare with eyes so wide,
Are only pumpkins on a porch
     With candlelight inside.

And there are no such things as ghosts . . .
     Those figures shining white,
Are only children just like me
     Wrapped up in sheets so tight.

I do not fear a single thing
     On Halloween you see,
Because I know they really are
     Not what they seem to be.

For ghosts and goblins, witches, spooks,
     And other scary folks
We hear about on Halloween
     Are really only jokes.

by Cora May Preble

Cora May Preble was born on 2 March 1893 in Benton, Kennebec County, Maine, United States of America. She became a writer and a poet. Cora May Preble passed on at 83 years of age on 26 March 1976 in Lynwood, Los Angeles County, California, United States of America.

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Happy Halloween

10/31/2018

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Happy Halloween

It’s late and we are sleepy,
     The air is cold and still.
Our jack-o-lantern grins at us
     Upon the window sill.
We’re stuffed with cake and candy
     And we’ve had a lot of fun,
But now it’s time to go to bed
     And dream of all we’ve done.
We’ll dream of ghosts and goblins
     And of witches that we’ve seen,
And we’ll dream of trick-or-treating
     On this happy Halloween.

by Author Unknown

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Halloween

10/31/2018

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Halloween

Tonight is the night
     When colorful leaves fly
Like witches on switches
     Across the sky,
When elf and sprite
     Flit through the night
On a moony sheen.

Tonight is the night
     When leaves make a sound
Like a gnome in his home
     Under the ground,
When spooks and trolls
     Creep out of holes
Mossy and green.

Tonight is the night
     When pumpkins stare
Through sheaves and leaves
     Everywhere,
When ghoul and ghost
     And goblin host
Dance round their queen.
     It’s Halloween.

by Harry Behn

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Halloween Wishes

10/30/2018

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Halloween Wishes

Since this is the time for goblins and bats,
     Halloween spirits, ghosts and cats,
Weird-happenings and witches brew,
     These are the things I wish for you.

May the only spirit you chance to meet,
     Be the spirit of love and warm friends sweet.
May the tricks that you are asked to do,
     Be a trick to help you gain a friend or two.

So, by tomorrow, pick three friends sweet,
     And give them all a Halloween treat.
You only have one day, so hurry!
     Leave a treat on the doorstep, then flee in a hurry!

by Author Unknown

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Owl

10/29/2018

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Owl

An owl sat watching in a tree,
     Just as wise as he could be,
Watching tricksters from door to door run,
     Trick or treating and having fun.
After he had watched the whole scene,
     He said, “Whoo, it’s Owl-o-ween!”

by Author Unknown

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Halloween

10/28/2018

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Halloween

The night is dark
     and the goblins are out,
and the witches and black cats
     are prowling about.

And costumed creatures
     the strangest I’ve seen,
are knocking on doors
     ’cause tonight’s Halloween!

by Author Unknown

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Jack-O-Lantern

10/27/2018

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Jack-O-Lantern

Jack-o-lantern pumpkin head
     He is a fearful sight.
If I were you, I’d be afraid
     To meet him in the night.

By day he is a pumpkin,
     But just you wait ’til night.
When out of eyes and nose and mouth
     There shines a yellow light.

by Author Unknown

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This is Halloween

10/22/2018

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This is Halloween

Goblins on the doorstep,
     Phantoms in the air,
Owls on witches’ gate posts,
     Giving stare for stare.

Cats on flying broomsticks,
     Bats against the moon,
Stirring round of fate-cakes,
     With a solemn spoon.

Whirling apple parings,
     Figures draped in sheets,
Dodging, disappearing,
     Up and down the streets.

Jack-o’-lanterns grinning,
     Shadows on a screen,
Shrieks and starts and laughter -
     This is Halloween!

by Dorothy Brown Thompson

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Twelve Rules for a Safe Halloween

10/20/2018

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Twelve Rules for a Safe Halloween

(Just in case you have forgotten the rules for a safe and happy Halloween.)

1. When it looks as if a monster might be either dead or asleep, never poke it with a stick to find out which one it is.
2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
3. Do not search the basement or the attic of an old house or castle for the fuse box or circuit breaker, especially if someone tells you the weird noises are just the wind or the foundation settling.
4. When you have the benefit of numbers, stay together and never pair off or go it alone.
5. As a general rule, never solve puzzles that open the portal to Hell.
6. Do not take objects from the dead or from a haunted house.
7. If you find a town that looks deserted, there is probably a good reason for it. Do not stop and look around.
8. Do not fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you are sure you know what you are doing.
9. If you are running from a monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice. Also, note that despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shuffling along, it can still move fast enough to catch up to you.
10. Beware of strangers bearing strange tools, for example, chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased companions.
11. Kitty has claws. That black cat may look like a harmless furball, but you are better off not trying to pick it up or pet it, and give it wide berth. Also, where there are black cats, cackling witches that want to turn you into a frog by way of magic spells are likely to be nearby.
12. If something that is eight feet tall comes to your door, give it all the candy it wants, and then run out the door past it as fast as you, and hope that you are just having a particularly bad nightmare.

by Author Unknown

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Could Be Halloween

10/19/2018

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Could Be Halloween

Yowling, prowling, growling cat
     Why do you switch your tail like that?
Why do your eyes flash gold and green?
     Could be - must be - Halloween!

Slinky, inky, blinky cat,
     Why do you arch your back like that?
What scary creatures have you seen?
     Could be - must be - Halloween!

by Author Unknown

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Halloween

10/18/2018

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As black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween!
-Author Unknown

Sally: What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
Allie: Do you believe in people?

The Halloween House

I’m told there’s a Green Thing in there.
And the sign on the gate says, “Beware!”
But of course it’s not true.
That’s why I’m sending you
To sneak in and find out - but take care!

by John Ciardi (John Anthony Ciardi (1916 - 1986))

Priscilla: Why was the mummy so tense?
Sheila: He was all wound up!

How to Be a Halloween Ghost Trick-Or-Treater: Take an old white sheet and cut a hole in its center slightly smaller than your head because somehow, the hole will always end up being larger than what it seemed when you cut it. Alternatively, cut two holes for your eyes to see through and if you like, one hole for your mouth, in the sheet. The holes do not have to be perfect. Slip the sheet over your head and examine the length, which should fall no lower than your knees or perhaps your ankles. Cut away all material that falls below either your knees or your ankles to prevent yourself from tripping on it. If needed, tie a length of white sheet or rope about your waist to help keep the sheet under control. To complete the look, carry a pillowcase to hold all the goodies you collect. Practice making ghostly noises as you walk from house to house.

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Phillip.
Phillip, who?
Phillip my bag with candy, please!

Tip: Put your name on your goodies bag or bucket so it will not get mixed up with the other kids’ bags and buckets of treats.

Walter: Is it okay to eat Halloween candy with your fingers?
Wallace: No, eat your candy first, and then eat your fingers later.

Halloween has been linked by some folklorist to the festival and feast of Pomona of Ancient Rome. Pomona is a goddess, a creation of human imagination, who watches over and cares for fruiting trees, orchards, and gardens. Pomona is not associated with the harvesting of fruits, but rather with the flourishing of the trees. She is an expert in pruning and grafting, a labor of love in which she is completely absorbed. Pomona’s name is derived from the Latin word ‘pomum’ meaning ‘fruit.’ She is often depicted holding a platter of fruit or a cornucopia (horn of plenty). Her festival and feast day is on 13 August of each year. Many Halloween customs and games that feature apples, such as bobbing for apples, and nuts, date from Ancient Roman times. For this reason, Halloween has at times been called San-Apple Night and Nutcrack Night, and in times past, trick-or-treaters received mostly fruits and nuts rather than candy. Halloween is also linked by some folklorist to the Ancient Roman festival of the dead called Parentalia.

Lily: What do you get if you cross a witch with an ice sickle?
Lilith: A cold spell.

Shadows of a thousand years rise again unseen,
Voices whisper in the trees, “Tonight is Halloween!”
-Dexter Kozen

Stella: What is a ghost’s favorite dessert?
Della: Boo-berry pie!

Fillet of a fenny snake,
     In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
     Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting,
     Lizard’s leg, and owlet’s wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
     Like a Hell-broth, boil and bubble.
Double, double toil and trouble;
     Fire burn and cauldron bubble.
-William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616): “Macbeth” (1606), Act 4, scene 1

Gerome: Who does a goblin go out with on Halloween?
Roger: His ghoul friend!

Halloween is commonly associated with the Celtic festival of Samhain, pronounced as ‘sow-an’ or ‘sow-in,’ and derived from the Gaelic word ‘samuin’ meaning ‘Summer’s end.’ In Medieval Ireland and Scotland, the Samhain festival was held at sunset on 31 October and lasted through daylight on 1 November. It marked the ending of the Autumn/Fall harvest season, and the beginning of the dark season of Winter, with its shorter days and longer nights. It was a time for stocktaking and preparation for the cold barren months ahead. There was also a sense that this was the time of year when the physical and supernatural worlds were closest and strange things could happen. People thought that evil spirits could enter our world and steal the souls of good people, so they dressed in costumes to disguise themselves as ghouls and other spooks in hope of escaping being noticed by the evil spirits thought to be wandering the streets during Samhain. People also put out treats of food and drinks in front of their homes, and went from house to house enjoying the treats. Some believe that from this custom arose the Christian custom called ‘souling’ which itself became what we know as ‘trick-or-treating.’ Fires were lit to ward off the spooks and to ensure the Sun would return after the long, hard Winter. Often Druid priests would throw the bones of cattle into the flames, making them ‘bone fires’ from which came the word ‘bonfire.’

Halloween Greetings!

A hobgoblin remarked to his mate,
“Hurry up there, old sport, we’ll be late;
     And I fear from the looks
     Of our neighbors, the Spooks
They will get first to Earth, sure as fate.”

by Author Unknown

James: Where does a baby ghost sit at a restaurant?
Hermes: In a boo-ster chair!

Goblin: How you eat the candy bars you got for Halloween.

Pat: What amusement park ride do spooks like best?
Rick: The roller ghoster!

Halloween has links to Christian holy days, or holidays. The word ‘Halloween’ is short for ‘All Hallows’ Eve,’ which takes place on 31 October of each year and is a time for celebrating the Christian conquest of evil. All Hallows’ Eve is the evening before All Hallows’ Day (also called Hallowmas or All Saints’ Day), which takes place on 1 November of each year to celebrate saints. All Souls’ Day, which takes place on 2 November of each year, is a time for praying for the departed on their journey to Heaven. In an effort to convert pagans to Christianity, the Roman Catholic Church assimilated the traditions of the pagan holidays that fell on or around 31 October into the Christian holy days called All Hallows’ Eve (Halloween), All Hallows’ Day, and All Souls’ Day. All Hallows’ Eve, or Halloween, was first declared a feast by Pope Gregory IV in the year 835, and later instituted as a Christian celebration in connection with All Hallows’ Day (1 November) by Pope Boniface IV. By the end of the 12th century, these holy days had become days of holy obligation across Europe, and involved such traditions as ringing bells for the souls in purgatory and ‘souling,’ the custom of baking bread or ‘soul cakes’ for ‘all crysten (christened) souls.’ Souling is a predecessor to modern-day trick-or-treating - on All Hallows’ Day, the poor would go door-to-door offering prayers for the deceased in exchange for soul cakes.

Lynn: Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets?
Quinn: At boo!-tiques.

Is the reason why children sometimes dress up in Mommy’s old clothes for Halloween, and not Daddy’s old clothes, that Daddies do not have old clothes, because they are still wearing them?

Hannah: What is evil on the inside and green on the outside?
Shanna: A witch dressed as a pickle!

Trick or treat -
     Smell my feet,
Or give me something
     Good to eat!
-Author Unknown

Penny: What do you call a goblin that gets too close to a campfire?
Lenny: A toasty ghosty!

The Origin of the Jack O’Lantern: The first Jack O’Lanterns were carved in Ireland from turnips, to frighten away evil spirits. When Irish folks came to America in large numbers in the 1840’s, they found that pumpkins could be likewise carved and a candle placed inside them to make lanterns to lighten up the darkness, and so the new ‘American’ tradition came to be. And then there is what follows here . . .

According to folklore, Jack O’Lanterns are named after a stingy farmer named Jack. One day, Jack tricked the Devil into climbing up into an apple tree to get a juicy apple, and then Jack quickly cut the sign of the cross into the tree trunk, preventing the Devil from coming back down. Jack next made the Devil promise he would not go after his soul in any way. The Devil agreed; however, all of this did not prevent Jack from later passing away naturally when his time came. After Jack had passed on, he arrived at the gates of Heaven, where he was turned away because he was a mean, stingy man. Desperate for a resting place, he went to the Devil. The Devil, in keeping to his earlier promise, turned Jack away from entering Hell. “But where can I go?” Jack pleaded with him. “Back to where you came from!” replied the Devil. As the night was dark, and as the way was long, the Devil tossed to Jack a lighted coal from the fires of Hell. Jack, who was chewing on a turnip at the time, placed the coal inside it, and used this as a lantern to light his way in the dark. Ever since that day, Jack has been known as Jack of the Lantern, which became shortened over time to Jack O’Lantern. He still continues to travel the world over, waving his glowing ember in a vegetable in every direction, in search of a final resting place. And, much like the mysterious Will O’ the Wisp, he leads lost people who are out in the darkness away from the right path.

Ira: What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack O’Lantern by its diameter?
Isa: Pumpkin Pi!

Corey: Why was the witch kicked out of school?
Cora: Because she flunked spelling.

Boo!

B is for broomsticks for witches to fly,
O is outrageous spooks that go by,
O is for orange pumpkins so bright,
(These are the signs of a Halloween night.)

by Author Unknown

Emma: How does a witch tell time?
Lee: By looking at her witch-watch.

When witches go riding
     And black cats are seen,
The Moon laughs and whispers,
     ’Tis near Halloween!
-Author Unknown

Edna: How do you mend a broken Jack O’Lantern?
Ned: With a pumpkin patch!

Roses are red,
     Violets are blue,
We’re out trick-or-treating
     How about you?
-Author Unknown

Todd: How do you make a witch itch?
Ted: Just take away the ‘w.’

Hugh: What did the mummy detective say?
Grant: “Alright, let’s wrap this case up.”

Stephen Clarke holds the record for the world’s fastest pumpkin carving time: 24.03 seconds, smashing his previous record of 54.72 seconds. The rules of the competition state that the pumpkin must weigh less than 24 pounds and be carved in a traditional way, which requires at least eyes, nose, ears, and a mouth.

Robin: What do birds give out on Halloween night?
Jay: Tweets!

Scarecrows have become a popular Halloween fixture. They symbolize the ancient agricultural roots of the Halloween Holiday.

Nick: Where do ghosts go swimming?
Ken: In the Dead Sea.

Remember, it’s not all about the costumes, but all about how people interact with people with costumes!

Ace: How can you tell twin witches apart?
Tex: You can never really tell which witch is which.

Frances: Why is Dracula not invited to Halloween parties?
Francis: Because he is a pain in the neck.

Laura: Why was the witch’s cat giggling hysterically?
Delores: Because it was a giggle-puss.

Jimmy: What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
Jeremiah: Boo boos.

How to Make a Halloween Ghost Decoration: Take a square of tissue, a paper napkin, or a paper towel, and ball it up. Take another piece of the same material and form it around the balled-up piece. Tie with a piece of thread or string or bag tie. Draw eyes and mouth on your ghost with a pen or felt tip marker. Using a sewing needle and thread, attach a length of thread to the top of the ghost to tie it from a support such as a tree branch or the ceiling of your porch. Party favor ghosts can be made by placing tissue over lollipops and tying it together.

Hans: Where do baby ghosts go during the daytime?
Lars: Day-scare centers!

Happy Halloween!

I’d rather be foolish than ghoulish,
     I’d rather dress up as a clown;
I’d rather wear clothes with polka dot bows,
     I’d much rather smile than frown.

I’d rather be kooky than spooky,
     I’d rather be friendly than mean;
I’d rather go greeting than tricking and treating,
     I’d rather have a fun Halloween!

by Author Unknown

Lacy: How can you tell when windows are scared?
Lucy: They get shudders!

Darcy: How does a witch work off all that Halloween candy?
Darla: She hex-ercises.

Some people say that Halloween arose out of superstition, or beliefs based on fear and a misunderstanding of how the world works, and that it continues as a yearly event because people find it fun. Others say there is a little more to it than that.

Boris: What do you call a fat Jack O’Lantern?
Igor: A plumpkin.

Halloween is celebrated on 31 October of each year.

To all good little goblins, ghouls, and ghosts, we wish you an extremely spooktacular Halloween!

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Pumpkins

10/17/2018

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Pumpkins

Pumpkins are a curious thing,
     They don’t dance and they don’t sing.
They don’t have hair, they don’t meow,
     They don’t look much like a cow.
They just sit around all day,
     Out in the fields among the hay,
Sometimes they gather by the stable,
     Sometimes they end up on the kitchen table.
But what brings a pumpkin to full life,
     Is a guided hand with a carving knife.

by Suzy Wolf

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It’s Halloween

10/15/2018

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It’s Halloween

When the world is wrapped in slumber
And the Moon is sailing high
If you peep between the curtains
You’ll see witches riding by.

by Author Unknown

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Pumpkin

10/11/2018

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Pumpkin

We bought a fat orange pumpkin,
     The plumpest sort they sell.
We neatly scooped the inside out
     and only left the shell.
We carved a funny funny-face
     of silly shape and size,
A pointy nose, a jagged mouth
     And two enormous eyes.
We set it in a window
     and we put a candle in,
Then lit it up
     for all to see
Our jack-o-lantern grin.

by Author Unknown

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If You’ve Never

9/26/2018

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If You’ve Never

If you’ve never seen an old witch
     Riding through the sky -
Or never felt big bat’s wings
     Flopping, as they fly -

If you’ve never touched a white thing
     Gliding through the air,
And knew it was a ghost because
     You got a dreadful scare -

If you’ve never heard the night owls,
     Crying, “Whoo-whoo-whoo?”
And never jumped at pumpkin eyes
     Gleaming out at you -

If all of these exciting things
     You’ve never heard or seen,
Why then - you’ve missed a lot of fun,
     Because - that’s Halloween!

by Elsie Melchert Fowler

Elsie Melchert Fowler was born on 24 May 1880 in Chicago, Illinois, United States of America. She was married to Myron Marshall Fowler (1876 - 1957). She became a writer for magazines and newspapers, and a poet. Some of her poems have been set to song and heard in radio broadcasts. Elsie Melchert Fowler passed on at 85 years of age on 18 May 1966.

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