We do declare that to be such wonderful nonsense . . .
To Be or Not to Be
I sometimes think I’d rather crow
And be a rooster than to roost
And be a crow. But I dunno.
A rooster he can roost also,
Which don’t seem fair when crows can’t crow.
Which may help some. Still I dunno.
Crows should be glad of one thing, though;
Nobody thinks of eating crow,
While roosters they are good enough
For anyone unless they’re tough.
There are lots of tough old roosters, though,
And anyway a crow can’t crow,
So mebby roosters stand more show.
It looks that way. But I dunno.
by Author Unknown
“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.” -Noam Chomsky (Avram Noam Chomsky (born 1928)): “Syntactic Structures” (1957); an example of a sentence that is grammatically correct yet meaningless
Moorlands of the Not
Across the moorlands of the Not
We chase the gruesome When;
And hunt the Itness of the What
Through forests of the Then.
Into the Inner Consciousness
We track the crafty Where;
We spear the Ego tough, and beard
The Selfhood in his lair.
With lassos of the brain we catch
The Isness of the Was;
And in the copses* of the Whence
We hear the think bees buzz.
We climb the slippery Whichbark tree
To watch the Thusness roll
And pause betimes in gnostic rimes
To woo the Over Soul.
by Author Unknown
*copses: a small groups of trees
“Yally Bally had a jolly golliwog. Feeling folly, Yally Bally bought his jolly golliwog a dolly made of holly. The golliwog, feeling jolly, named the holly dollie Polly. So Yally Bally’s jolly golliwog’s holly dollie Polly’s also jolly!” -Author Unknown
“To appreciate nonsense requires a serious interest in life.” -Gelett Burgess (Frank Gelett Burgess (1866 - 1951)): “The Romance of the Commonplace” (1902), ‘The Sense of Humor’
I love to stand upon my head
And think of things sublime
Until my mother interrupts
And says it’s dinner-time.
by Author Unknown
“Nothing is capable to being well set to music that is not nonsense.” -Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719): as quoted in “The Spectator” (21 March 1711), Number 18
The Moon Is Up
The Moon is up, the Moon is up!
The larks begin to fly,
And, like a drowsy buttercup,
Dark Phoebus skims the sky,
The elephant, with cheerful voice,
Sings blithely on the spray;
The bats and beetles all rejoice,
Then let me, too, be gay.
I would I were a porcupine,
And wore a peacock’s tail;
To-morrow, if the Moon but shine,
Perchance I’ll be a whale.
Then let me, like the cauliflower,
Be merry while I may,
And, ere there comes a sunny hour
To cloud my heart, be gay!
by Author Unknown
“If half the road was made of jam,
The other half of bread,
How very nice my walks would be,”
The greedy infant said.
by Author Unknown
“Nonsense wakes up the brain cells. And it helps develop a sense of humor, which is awfully important in this day and age.” -Doctor Seuss (pseudonym of Theodor Seuss Geisel (1904 - 1991)): as quoted in ‘Author Isn’t Just a Cat in the Hat’ by Miles Corwin, published in “The Los Angeles Times” (27 November 1983); also in Philip Nel: “Dr. Seuss: American Icon” (2004), page 38
●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
Hickory Dickory Dock
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The mouse ran up the clock,
The clock struck one, and down he run,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bird looked at the clock,
The clock struck two, and away she flew,
Hickory Dickory Dock
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The dog barked at the clock,
The clock struck three, fiddle-de-dee,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bear slept on the clock,
The clock struck four, he ran out the door,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bee buzzed round the clock,
The clock struck five, she went to her hive,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The hen clucked at the clock,
The clock struck six, fiddle-sticks,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The cat ran round the clock,
The clock struck seven, she wanted to get ’em,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The horse jumped over the clock,
The clock struck eight, he ate some cake,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The cow danced on the clock,
The clock struck nine, she felt so fine,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The pig oinked at the clock,
The clock struck ten, she did it again,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The snake squirmed out of the clock,
The clock struck eleven, he said, “Let me get in,”
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The snail slimed up the clock,
The clock struck twelve, what a sticky self,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
by Author Unknown
●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
“Don’t, for Heaven’s sake, be afraid of talking nonsense! But you must pay attention to your nonsense.” -Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889 - 1951): “On Certainty” (German: “Über Gewissheit”) (1969), page 56
I Always Sneeze
Franks and fries, and French fondue
Beans and burgers and biscuits, too
Chicken, chili, and cheddar cheese
When I munch too much, I always sneeze!
by Author Unknown
Riddle: If it takes a woodpecker eight months to peck a four-inch hole in a tree, how long would it take a grasshopper to kick all the seeds out of a pickle four inches long?
Solution: There is no answer for this ridiculous riddle!
“Nonsense is the oddly appealing stuff that makes more or less sense than stuff that either makes sense or makes no sense.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dee
Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee
Resolved to have a battle,
For Tweedle-dum said Tweedle-dee
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.
Just then flew by a monstrous crow,
As big as a tar-barrel,
Which frightened both the heroes so
They quite forgot their quarrel.
by Author Unknown
“I conclude that there is as much sense in nonsense as there is nonsense in sense.” -Anthony Burgess (pseudonym of John Burgess Wilson (1917 - 1993)): “New York Times Book Review” (9 August 1987)
King Arthur
When good King Arthur ruled the land,
He was a goodly king:
He stole three pecks of barley meal,
To make a bag-pudding.
A bag-pudding the king did make,
And stuffed it well with plums;
And in it put great lumps of fat,
As big as my two thumbs.
The king and queen did eat thereof,
And noblemen beside;
And what they could not eat that night,
The queen next morning fried.
by Author Unknown
“Whenever you come near the human race, there’s layers and layers of nonsense.” -Thornton Wilder (Thornton Niven Wilder (1897 - 1975)): “Our Town” (1938)
Three Acres of Land
My father left me three acres of land,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
My father left me three acres of land,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I ploughed it with a ram’s horn,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And sowed it all over with one peppercorn.
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I harrowed it with a bramble bush,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And reaped it with my little penknife,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I got the mice to carry it to the barn,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And thrashed it with a goose’s quill,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I got the cat to carry it to the mill,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
The miller he swore he would have her paw,
And the cat she swore she would scratch his face,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
by Author Unknown
“The nonsense that charms is close to sense.” -Mason Cooley (1927 - 2002): “City Aphorisms, Eleventh Selection” (1993)
“There are two ways of dealing with nonsense in this world. One is to put nonsense in the right place; as when people put nonsense into nursery rhymes. The other is to put nonsense in the wrong place; as when they put it into educational addresses, psychological criticisms, and complaints against nursery rhymes or other normal amusements of mankind.” -G. K. Chesterton (Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874 - 1936)): “Child Psychology and Nonsense” (15 October 1921)
A Riddle
The man in the wilderness asked of me
How many strawberries grew in the sea.
I answered him as I thought good,
As many as red herrings grow in the wood.
by Author Unknown
“No one is exempt from talking nonsense; the misfortune is to do it solemnly.” -Michel de Montaigne (Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)): “Essays” (March 1580) Book III, Chapter I
A little nonsense now and then
Is relished by the wisest men.
by Author Unknown
Mingle a little folly with your wisdom;
a little nonsense now and then is pleasant.
[English translation]
Misce stultitiam consiliis brevem:
Dulce est desipere in loco.
[original Latin]
-Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus (65 B.C.E. - 8 B.C.E.)): “Carmina,” Book IV, Ode 12, line 27
If
If all the land were apple-pie,
And all the sea were ink;
And all the trees were bread and cheese,
What should we do for drink?
by Author Unknown
“‘Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense respected.” -Charles Lamb
A Song on King William III
As I walked by myself,
And talked to myself,
Myself said unto me,
Look to thyself,
Take care of thyself,
For nobody cares for thee.
I answered myself,
And said to myself,
In the self-same repartee,
Look to thyself,
Or not look to thyself,
The selfsame thing will be.
by Author Unknown
“Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense.” -Robert Frost: letter (7 August 1915) to Louis Untermeyer
“Nonsense and beauty have close connections - closer connections than Art will allow.” -E. M. Forster: “The Longest Journey” (1907), Part I, Chapter 12
Lines by a Medium
I might not, if I could;
I should not, if I might;
Yet if I should I would,
And, shoulding, I should quite!
I must not, yet I may;
I can, and still I must;
But ah! I cannot - nay,
To must I may not, just!
I shall, although I will,
But be it understood,
If I may, can, shall - still
I might, could, would, or should!
by Author Unknown
“It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled seas of thought.” -John Kenneth Galbraith: “The Affluent Society” (1958), Chapter 11, section iv
This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . the best bunch of nonsense on the web . . . remember, it is not a waste of time and effort if it brings a smile to someone’s face . . .
To Be or Not to Be
I sometimes think I’d rather crow
And be a rooster than to roost
And be a crow. But I dunno.
A rooster he can roost also,
Which don’t seem fair when crows can’t crow.
Which may help some. Still I dunno.
Crows should be glad of one thing, though;
Nobody thinks of eating crow,
While roosters they are good enough
For anyone unless they’re tough.
There are lots of tough old roosters, though,
And anyway a crow can’t crow,
So mebby roosters stand more show.
It looks that way. But I dunno.
by Author Unknown
“Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.” -Noam Chomsky (Avram Noam Chomsky (born 1928)): “Syntactic Structures” (1957); an example of a sentence that is grammatically correct yet meaningless
Moorlands of the Not
Across the moorlands of the Not
We chase the gruesome When;
And hunt the Itness of the What
Through forests of the Then.
Into the Inner Consciousness
We track the crafty Where;
We spear the Ego tough, and beard
The Selfhood in his lair.
With lassos of the brain we catch
The Isness of the Was;
And in the copses* of the Whence
We hear the think bees buzz.
We climb the slippery Whichbark tree
To watch the Thusness roll
And pause betimes in gnostic rimes
To woo the Over Soul.
by Author Unknown
*copses: a small groups of trees
“Yally Bally had a jolly golliwog. Feeling folly, Yally Bally bought his jolly golliwog a dolly made of holly. The golliwog, feeling jolly, named the holly dollie Polly. So Yally Bally’s jolly golliwog’s holly dollie Polly’s also jolly!” -Author Unknown
“To appreciate nonsense requires a serious interest in life.” -Gelett Burgess (Frank Gelett Burgess (1866 - 1951)): “The Romance of the Commonplace” (1902), ‘The Sense of Humor’
I love to stand upon my head
And think of things sublime
Until my mother interrupts
And says it’s dinner-time.
by Author Unknown
“Nothing is capable to being well set to music that is not nonsense.” -Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719): as quoted in “The Spectator” (21 March 1711), Number 18
The Moon Is Up
The Moon is up, the Moon is up!
The larks begin to fly,
And, like a drowsy buttercup,
Dark Phoebus skims the sky,
The elephant, with cheerful voice,
Sings blithely on the spray;
The bats and beetles all rejoice,
Then let me, too, be gay.
I would I were a porcupine,
And wore a peacock’s tail;
To-morrow, if the Moon but shine,
Perchance I’ll be a whale.
Then let me, like the cauliflower,
Be merry while I may,
And, ere there comes a sunny hour
To cloud my heart, be gay!
by Author Unknown
“If half the road was made of jam,
The other half of bread,
How very nice my walks would be,”
The greedy infant said.
by Author Unknown
“Nonsense wakes up the brain cells. And it helps develop a sense of humor, which is awfully important in this day and age.” -Doctor Seuss (pseudonym of Theodor Seuss Geisel (1904 - 1991)): as quoted in ‘Author Isn’t Just a Cat in the Hat’ by Miles Corwin, published in “The Los Angeles Times” (27 November 1983); also in Philip Nel: “Dr. Seuss: American Icon” (2004), page 38
●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
Hickory Dickory Dock
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The mouse ran up the clock,
The clock struck one, and down he run,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bird looked at the clock,
The clock struck two, and away she flew,
Hickory Dickory Dock
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The dog barked at the clock,
The clock struck three, fiddle-de-dee,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bear slept on the clock,
The clock struck four, he ran out the door,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The bee buzzed round the clock,
The clock struck five, she went to her hive,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The hen clucked at the clock,
The clock struck six, fiddle-sticks,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The cat ran round the clock,
The clock struck seven, she wanted to get ’em,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The horse jumped over the clock,
The clock struck eight, he ate some cake,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The cow danced on the clock,
The clock struck nine, she felt so fine,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The pig oinked at the clock,
The clock struck ten, she did it again,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The snake squirmed out of the clock,
The clock struck eleven, he said, “Let me get in,”
Hickory Dickory Dock!
Hickory Dickory Dock,
The snail slimed up the clock,
The clock struck twelve, what a sticky self,
Hickory Dickory Dock!
by Author Unknown
●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●
“Don’t, for Heaven’s sake, be afraid of talking nonsense! But you must pay attention to your nonsense.” -Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889 - 1951): “On Certainty” (German: “Über Gewissheit”) (1969), page 56
I Always Sneeze
Franks and fries, and French fondue
Beans and burgers and biscuits, too
Chicken, chili, and cheddar cheese
When I munch too much, I always sneeze!
by Author Unknown
Riddle: If it takes a woodpecker eight months to peck a four-inch hole in a tree, how long would it take a grasshopper to kick all the seeds out of a pickle four inches long?
Solution: There is no answer for this ridiculous riddle!
“Nonsense is the oddly appealing stuff that makes more or less sense than stuff that either makes sense or makes no sense.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born 1966)
Tweedle-Dum and Tweedle-Dee
Tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee
Resolved to have a battle,
For Tweedle-dum said Tweedle-dee
Had spoiled his nice new rattle.
Just then flew by a monstrous crow,
As big as a tar-barrel,
Which frightened both the heroes so
They quite forgot their quarrel.
by Author Unknown
“I conclude that there is as much sense in nonsense as there is nonsense in sense.” -Anthony Burgess (pseudonym of John Burgess Wilson (1917 - 1993)): “New York Times Book Review” (9 August 1987)
King Arthur
When good King Arthur ruled the land,
He was a goodly king:
He stole three pecks of barley meal,
To make a bag-pudding.
A bag-pudding the king did make,
And stuffed it well with plums;
And in it put great lumps of fat,
As big as my two thumbs.
The king and queen did eat thereof,
And noblemen beside;
And what they could not eat that night,
The queen next morning fried.
by Author Unknown
“Whenever you come near the human race, there’s layers and layers of nonsense.” -Thornton Wilder (Thornton Niven Wilder (1897 - 1975)): “Our Town” (1938)
Three Acres of Land
My father left me three acres of land,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
My father left me three acres of land,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I ploughed it with a ram’s horn,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And sowed it all over with one peppercorn.
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I harrowed it with a bramble bush,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And reaped it with my little penknife,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I got the mice to carry it to the barn,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
And thrashed it with a goose’s quill,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
I got the cat to carry it to the mill,
Sing ivy, sing ivy;
The miller he swore he would have her paw,
And the cat she swore she would scratch his face,
Sing holly, go whistle, and ivy!
by Author Unknown
“The nonsense that charms is close to sense.” -Mason Cooley (1927 - 2002): “City Aphorisms, Eleventh Selection” (1993)
“There are two ways of dealing with nonsense in this world. One is to put nonsense in the right place; as when people put nonsense into nursery rhymes. The other is to put nonsense in the wrong place; as when they put it into educational addresses, psychological criticisms, and complaints against nursery rhymes or other normal amusements of mankind.” -G. K. Chesterton (Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874 - 1936)): “Child Psychology and Nonsense” (15 October 1921)
A Riddle
The man in the wilderness asked of me
How many strawberries grew in the sea.
I answered him as I thought good,
As many as red herrings grow in the wood.
by Author Unknown
“No one is exempt from talking nonsense; the misfortune is to do it solemnly.” -Michel de Montaigne (Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)): “Essays” (March 1580) Book III, Chapter I
A little nonsense now and then
Is relished by the wisest men.
by Author Unknown
Mingle a little folly with your wisdom;
a little nonsense now and then is pleasant.
[English translation]
Misce stultitiam consiliis brevem:
Dulce est desipere in loco.
[original Latin]
-Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus (65 B.C.E. - 8 B.C.E.)): “Carmina,” Book IV, Ode 12, line 27
If
If all the land were apple-pie,
And all the sea were ink;
And all the trees were bread and cheese,
What should we do for drink?
by Author Unknown
“‘Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense respected.” -Charles Lamb
A Song on King William III
As I walked by myself,
And talked to myself,
Myself said unto me,
Look to thyself,
Take care of thyself,
For nobody cares for thee.
I answered myself,
And said to myself,
In the self-same repartee,
Look to thyself,
Or not look to thyself,
The selfsame thing will be.
by Author Unknown
“Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense.” -Robert Frost: letter (7 August 1915) to Louis Untermeyer
“Nonsense and beauty have close connections - closer connections than Art will allow.” -E. M. Forster: “The Longest Journey” (1907), Part I, Chapter 12
Lines by a Medium
I might not, if I could;
I should not, if I might;
Yet if I should I would,
And, shoulding, I should quite!
I must not, yet I may;
I can, and still I must;
But ah! I cannot - nay,
To must I may not, just!
I shall, although I will,
But be it understood,
If I may, can, shall - still
I might, could, would, or should!
by Author Unknown
“It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled seas of thought.” -John Kenneth Galbraith: “The Affluent Society” (1958), Chapter 11, section iv
This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . the best bunch of nonsense on the web . . . remember, it is not a waste of time and effort if it brings a smile to someone’s face . . .
