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Pickles

7/16/2019

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​Here you will find silly fun stuff to say to people while they are eating pickles . . .
 
Stacy: What is green, noisy, and moves very fast?
Tracy: A herd of stampeding pickles! Look, there they go now!
 
Brightly colored pickles, an idea that likely originated in the Mississippi Delta, are spreading throughout the land. You can find them in red, purple, orange . . . all the colors of your favorite powdered drink mix. Even children like them. Just make Kool-Aid or other powdered drink mix according to package directions, but make it double-strength. Add pickles that have been cut lengthwise, and then place them in a refrigerator for a week to allow for color absorption.

Overheard: A pickle is, like, a really gnarly cucumber, dude!
 
Some people say that the English word ‘pickle’ is derived from the Dutch word ‘pekel’ meaning ‘brine.’ Brine is a solution made of water and salt (commonly sodium chloride). Other people say the pickle got its name in the 1300’s when English speaking people mispronounced the name of William Beukelz, who was a Dutch fisherman known for pickling fish.
 
Carrie: What is green, bumpy, and faster than a speeding bullet?
Corey: Super Pickle!
 
According to pickle industry standards, a pickle’s crunch should be audible from ten paces away.

Ryan: What do you get if you cross a cucumber with a werewolf?
Brian: A pickle that gets hairy when there is a full moon.
 
The Italian financier, navigator, and cartographer Amerigo Vespucci, for whom the Americas (North and South) were named, was a pickle merchant before becoming an explorer. Because refrigeration did not exist back then, pickling was an important way of keeping food edible for long periods of time, and everything from fish to fruits was pickled in bottles and barrels.

Nelson: What do you do with a pickle when it is one year old?
Nellie: Wish it a happy birthday!
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​Who has a hankering for a gherkin?
 
Whole Gherkins are great for snacking, or can be served alongside a sandwich.
 
Any food can be pickled. Vegetables can be pickled, including peppers and beets, and there are pickled hard-boiled eggs, pickled fish such as herring, and pickled pig’s feet. However, the word ‘pickle’ used as a noun refers specifically to a pickled cucumber.
 
Stout: What is long and green and grouchy?
Slim: A sour pickle.
 
According to pickle industry research, the average American prefers pickles with seven ‘warts’ per square inch, while Europeans prefer pickles with no ‘warts.’ Apparently, Americans like pickles that are easy to grip and Europeans like their pickles slippery.
 
Paula: What is green and sour and always changing its mind?
Polly: A fickle pickle.
 
Twenty-six billion pickles are packed each year in the United States of America, which amounts to about nine pounds of pickles per person. So, who wants a pickle?
 
Mr. Perkins
 
A funny young fellow named Perkins
Was terribly fond of small gherkins.
     One day after tea
     He ate ninety-three -
And pickled his internal workings.
 
by Author Unknown
 
An average-size dill pickle contains just 15 calories.
 
Al: What is long and green and jumps every few seconds?
Bert: A pickle with the hiccups!
 
Pickles are a fat-free food.
 
Alex: What is green and sour and gives presents to boys and girls?
Rex: Santa Pickle.
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​Sliced pickles are often found on hamburger sandwiches and other types of sandwiches.
 
Are pickles a fruit or a vegetable? Actually, they are both, according to the United States Supreme Court. Because pickles have seeds, they are technically a ‘fruit of the vine.’ However, because pickles are made from cucumbers, they are generally known as a vegetable.

Chase: What is a pickle in full bloom called?
Grace: A daffy-dill.
 
In order for a pickle to be considered officially a pickle in Connecticut, United States of America, it must bounce.
 
Question: What is black and white and green and bumpy?
Answer: A pickle wearing a tuxedo.
 
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e
☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ 
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
 
Peter Piper
 
Peter Piper picked a peck
     Of pickled peppers;
A peck of pickled peppers
     Peter Piper picked.
 
If Peter Piper picked a peck
     Of pickled peppers,
Where’s the peck of pickled peppers
     Peter Piper picked?
 
by Author Unknown
 

══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e 
☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ 
══════════════════════════════════════════════════

​
Varieties of cucumber pickles include Bread-and-Butter, Brined, Cornichon, Danish, Deep-Fried, Dill, Gherkin, Hungarian, Kosher Dill, Lime, Polish, and Swedish.
 
Josiah: What is green and hairy and hangs out in New York?
Joseph: King Kong Pickle.
 
National Pickle Day, or Pickle Appreciation Day as some folks like to call it, is observed on 14 November of each year.
 
Russell: What is green and pecks on trees?
Randall: Woody Wood Pickle!
 
Natives of the Pacific Islands pickle food in holes in the ground lined with banana leaves, in order to have a reliable reserve of food during the rainy season. The pickles are so valuable that they have become a part of the courting process, helping a man to prove that he will be able to provide for a woman. So, in Fiji, a guy cannot marry a gal without first showing her parents his stock of pickled food.
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Pickle relish goes well atop a hotdog on a bun, or can be put in potato salad, tuna salad, or macaroni salad.
 
“Hunger is the best pickle.” -Benjamin Franklin
 
Mick: What is green and goes through walls?
Mack: A pickle, but you have to throw it really hard!
 
Henry John Heinz, founder of the H. J. Heinz Company, was a marketing and advertising pioneer. His company had the largest commercial exhibit at the 1893 Chicago World’s Fair, and in 1900 erected the first electric sign in New York City, a colossal forty foot long pickle.

Claudia: What did one pickle say to the other?
Claudette: “You mean a great dill to me.”
 
The expression “in a pickle” originated with the English playwright William Shakespeare. He used it in his play, “The Tempest” (about 1611) in the two lines: “How cam’st thou in this pickle?” and “I have been in such a pickle!”
 
Ricky: Why do gherkins giggle a lot?
Mickey: They’re pickle-ish!
 
Some people throw pickle juice away, but it can be poured through a sieve or cheesecloth and then served chilled as a beverage, just like lemonade.
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​Who wants a glass of pickle juice?!
 
“You can drink pickle juice and imitate gorillas and do silly dances and sing stupid songs and wear funny hats and be as imperfect as you please and still be a good person. Good people are hard to find nowadays. And they’re a lot more fun than perfect people any day of the week.” -Stephen Manes
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​Bread-and-Butter Pickles can go on bread on which has been spread a generous amount of real butter.
 
Thomas Jefferson: What is red, white, blue, and green?
Benjamin Franklin: A patriotic pickle!
 
More than half the cucumbers grown in the United States of America are made into pickles. So, what is growing in your garden?
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George turned to his wife Martha and said, “Do we need these pickles? They are on sale, and they seem like a really good dill.”
 
Overheard: I love you more than pickles!
 
This is MFOL! . . . well, that finishes things pickle-ish, and so now it is time for us to go out to get more sweet pickles, sour pickles, sliced pickles, pickle relish, and pickle juice . . . it seems we are running low on all of them . . . 
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