It seems like an inviting house - shall we see if anybody is home?
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Never Mind Them Watermelons
Well now, old Sam Gibb, he did not believe in ghosts. Not one bit. Everyone in town knew the old house back in the woods was haunted, but Sam Gibb just laughed whenever folks talked about it. Finally, the blacksmith dared Sam Gibb to spend the night in the haunted house. If he stayed there until dawn, the blacksmith would buy him a whole cartload of watermelons. Sam was delighted. Watermelon was Sam’s absolute favorite fruit. He accepted the dare at once, packed some matches and his pipe, and went right over to the house to spend the night.
Sam went into the old house, started a fire, lit his pipe, and settled into a rickety old chair with yesterday’s newspaper. As he was reading, he heard a creaking sound. Looking up, he saw that a gnarled little creature with glowing red eyes had taken the seat beside him. It had a long, forked tail, two horns on its head, claws at the ends of its hands, and sharp teeth that poked right through its large lips.
“There ain’t nobody here tonight except you and me,” the creature said to old Sam Gibb. It had a voice like the hiss of flames. Sam’s heart nearly stopped with fright. He leapt to his feet.
“There ain’t going to be nobody here but you in a minute,” Sam Gibb told the gnarled creature. He leapt straight for the nearest exit - which happened to be the window - and hi-tailed it down the lane lickety-split. He ran so fast he overtook two rabbits being chased by a coyote. But it wasn’t long before he heard the pounding of little hooves, and the gnarled creature with the red eyes had caught up with him.
“You’re making pretty good speed for an old man,” said the creature to old Sam Gibb.
“Oh, I can run much faster than this,” Sam Gibb told it. He took off like a bolt of lightning, leaving the gnarled creature in the dust. As he ran past the smithy, the blacksmith came flying out of the forge to see what was wrong.
“Never mind about them watermelons,” Sam Gibb shouted to the blacksmith without breaking his stride.
Old Sam Gibb ran all the way home and hid under his bed for the rest of the night. After that, he was a firm believer in ghosts and spooks, and he refused to go anywhere near the old house in the woods.
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
In the Dark
In the dark, dark woods, there is a dark, dark house.
And in the dark, dark house, there is a dark, dark room.
And in the dark, dark room, there is a dark, dark cabinet.
And in the dark, dark cabinet, there is a dark, dark shelf.
And on the dark, dark shelf, there is a dark, dark box.
And in the dark, dark box . . . there is a ghost!
by Author Unknown
Horror stories can be more or less frightening than reality. They form an important part of human play, helping to immunize us against the real terrors of the world in which we live so that we can go on in spite of it all. And the humor? It is the sugar that helps the medicine go down.
A woman awakened in the night to see a hideous apparition with glowing red eyes at the foot of her bed. The creature had an appearance like some sort of fog or mist, and she could see right through it. It had a hand on her husband’s ankle and was pulling him off the bed. The woman cried, “Stop!” The thing said, “He’s mine!” and continued to pull her husband off the bed. The woman screamed, “Be gone with you in the name of all that is good!” The fog immediately released the man’s ankle and vanished down into the narrow spaces between the floorboards, glowing red eyes and all, to be seen no more. When her husband awoke in the morning, he had dark bruises all around his ankle.
Skeleton and Ghost
A skeleton once in Khartoum
Invited a ghost to its room.
They spent the whole night
In the eeriest fight
As to which should be frightened of whom.
by Author Unknown
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Bob and Betty Hill
Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, were vacationing in Europe; as it happened, in Transylvania. They were driving a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late, and raining very hard. Bob could barely see ten feet in front of the car. Suddenly, the car skid out of control! Bob attempted to control the car, but to no avail. The car swerved and smashed into a tree.
Moments later, Bob shook his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looked over at the passenger seat and saw his wife unconscious, with a large bump on her head. Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knew he had to carry her to the nearest phone. Bob carefully picked his wife up and began trudging down the road. After a short while, he saw a light.
He headed toward the light, which was coming from a big old house. He approached the door and knocked. A minute passed. A small, hunched man opened the door. Bob immediately blurted out, “Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife, Betty. We have been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?”
“I am sorry,” replied the hunchback, “but we do not have a phone. My master is a doctor. Come in and I will go get him.”
Bob carried his wife in. An elegant man came down the stairs. “I am afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor. I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, take them down to the laboratory.”
With that, Igor picked up Betty and carried her downstairs, with Bob following closely behind. Igor placed Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapsed from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor placed Bob on an adjoining table. After a brief examination, Igor’s master looked worried. “Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion.”
Igor and his master worked feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty were no more. The Hills’ deaths upset Igor’s master greatly. Wearily, he climbed the steps to his conservatory, which housed his pipe organ, for it was here that he had always found solace. He began to play, and a stirring, haunting melody filled the house.
Meanwhile, Igor was still in the lab tidying up. As the music filled the lab, his eyes spied movement. He noticed the fingers on Betty’s hand twitch. Stunned, he watched as Bob’s arm began to rise! He was even further amazed as Betty sat straight up! Unable to contain himself, he dashed up the stairs to the conservatory. He burst in and shouted to his master -
You sure you want to know? Okay, you asked for it -
“Master, Master! The Hills are alive with the sound of music!”
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
“It’s fascinating to think that all around us there’s an invisible world we can’t even see. I’m speaking, of course, of the ‘World of the Invisible Scary Skeletons.’” -Jack Handey (born 1949)
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Never Mind Them Watermelons
Well now, old Sam Gibb, he did not believe in ghosts. Not one bit. Everyone in town knew the old house back in the woods was haunted, but Sam Gibb just laughed whenever folks talked about it. Finally, the blacksmith dared Sam Gibb to spend the night in the haunted house. If he stayed there until dawn, the blacksmith would buy him a whole cartload of watermelons. Sam was delighted. Watermelon was Sam’s absolute favorite fruit. He accepted the dare at once, packed some matches and his pipe, and went right over to the house to spend the night.
Sam went into the old house, started a fire, lit his pipe, and settled into a rickety old chair with yesterday’s newspaper. As he was reading, he heard a creaking sound. Looking up, he saw that a gnarled little creature with glowing red eyes had taken the seat beside him. It had a long, forked tail, two horns on its head, claws at the ends of its hands, and sharp teeth that poked right through its large lips.
“There ain’t nobody here tonight except you and me,” the creature said to old Sam Gibb. It had a voice like the hiss of flames. Sam’s heart nearly stopped with fright. He leapt to his feet.
“There ain’t going to be nobody here but you in a minute,” Sam Gibb told the gnarled creature. He leapt straight for the nearest exit - which happened to be the window - and hi-tailed it down the lane lickety-split. He ran so fast he overtook two rabbits being chased by a coyote. But it wasn’t long before he heard the pounding of little hooves, and the gnarled creature with the red eyes had caught up with him.
“You’re making pretty good speed for an old man,” said the creature to old Sam Gibb.
“Oh, I can run much faster than this,” Sam Gibb told it. He took off like a bolt of lightning, leaving the gnarled creature in the dust. As he ran past the smithy, the blacksmith came flying out of the forge to see what was wrong.
“Never mind about them watermelons,” Sam Gibb shouted to the blacksmith without breaking his stride.
Old Sam Gibb ran all the way home and hid under his bed for the rest of the night. After that, he was a firm believer in ghosts and spooks, and he refused to go anywhere near the old house in the woods.
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
In the Dark
In the dark, dark woods, there is a dark, dark house.
And in the dark, dark house, there is a dark, dark room.
And in the dark, dark room, there is a dark, dark cabinet.
And in the dark, dark cabinet, there is a dark, dark shelf.
And on the dark, dark shelf, there is a dark, dark box.
And in the dark, dark box . . . there is a ghost!
by Author Unknown
Horror stories can be more or less frightening than reality. They form an important part of human play, helping to immunize us against the real terrors of the world in which we live so that we can go on in spite of it all. And the humor? It is the sugar that helps the medicine go down.
A woman awakened in the night to see a hideous apparition with glowing red eyes at the foot of her bed. The creature had an appearance like some sort of fog or mist, and she could see right through it. It had a hand on her husband’s ankle and was pulling him off the bed. The woman cried, “Stop!” The thing said, “He’s mine!” and continued to pull her husband off the bed. The woman screamed, “Be gone with you in the name of all that is good!” The fog immediately released the man’s ankle and vanished down into the narrow spaces between the floorboards, glowing red eyes and all, to be seen no more. When her husband awoke in the morning, he had dark bruises all around his ankle.
Skeleton and Ghost
A skeleton once in Khartoum
Invited a ghost to its room.
They spent the whole night
In the eeriest fight
As to which should be frightened of whom.
by Author Unknown
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Bob and Betty Hill
Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, were vacationing in Europe; as it happened, in Transylvania. They were driving a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It was late, and raining very hard. Bob could barely see ten feet in front of the car. Suddenly, the car skid out of control! Bob attempted to control the car, but to no avail. The car swerved and smashed into a tree.
Moments later, Bob shook his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looked over at the passenger seat and saw his wife unconscious, with a large bump on her head. Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knew he had to carry her to the nearest phone. Bob carefully picked his wife up and began trudging down the road. After a short while, he saw a light.
He headed toward the light, which was coming from a big old house. He approached the door and knocked. A minute passed. A small, hunched man opened the door. Bob immediately blurted out, “Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife, Betty. We have been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?”
“I am sorry,” replied the hunchback, “but we do not have a phone. My master is a doctor. Come in and I will go get him.”
Bob carried his wife in. An elegant man came down the stairs. “I am afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor. I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, take them down to the laboratory.”
With that, Igor picked up Betty and carried her downstairs, with Bob following closely behind. Igor placed Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapsed from exhaustion and his own injuries, so Igor placed Bob on an adjoining table. After a brief examination, Igor’s master looked worried. “Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion.”
Igor and his master worked feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty were no more. The Hills’ deaths upset Igor’s master greatly. Wearily, he climbed the steps to his conservatory, which housed his pipe organ, for it was here that he had always found solace. He began to play, and a stirring, haunting melody filled the house.
Meanwhile, Igor was still in the lab tidying up. As the music filled the lab, his eyes spied movement. He noticed the fingers on Betty’s hand twitch. Stunned, he watched as Bob’s arm began to rise! He was even further amazed as Betty sat straight up! Unable to contain himself, he dashed up the stairs to the conservatory. He burst in and shouted to his master -
You sure you want to know? Okay, you asked for it -
“Master, Master! The Hills are alive with the sound of music!”
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
“It’s fascinating to think that all around us there’s an invisible world we can’t even see. I’m speaking, of course, of the ‘World of the Invisible Scary Skeletons.’” -Jack Handey (born 1949)
Perhaps now would be a good time for you to make the maniacal laugh you have been working on . . .
A couple was walking home after a Halloween party, and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tap sound coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they discovered an old man with a hammer and chisel was chipping away at one of the headstones. “Hey, Mister,” the guy said after catching his breath, “You scared us half to death - we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working out here so late at night?” “Those fools!” the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name!”
Overheard: If people in horror movies would only listen to me, they might be able to escape!
A man was walking home alone late one night when he heard a BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . behind him. Walking faster, he looked back, and made out the image of an upright coffin banging its way down the middle of the street towards him. BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . Terrified, the man began to run towards his home, the coffin bouncing quickly behind him . . . faster . . . faster . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . He ran up to his door, fumbled with his keys, opened the door, rushed in, slammed and locked the door behind him. However, the coffin crashed through his door, with the lid of the coffin clapping . . . clappity-BUMP . . . clappity-BUMP . . . clappity-BUMP . . . on the heels of the terrified man. Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locked himself in. His heart was pounding; his head was reeling; his breath was coming in sobbing gasps. With a loud crash, the coffin started breaking down the door . . . Bumping and clapping towards him. The man screamed and reached for something heavy, anything . . . his hand came to rest on a roll of cough drops. Desperate, he threw the cough drops as hard as he could at the apparition . . . and . . . the coffin stopped! Why, you ask? Because, as everyone knows, cough drops stop the coffin!
Earth itself is a horror story in a terrifying Universe. Here is just one example that proves it: Lightning strikes the planet about 6,000 times every minute, and little gray-green creatures called television repairmen run around all over the planet, chasing the lightning to try to catch it - what, that isn’t true at all?
“I grew up in Michigan on the Lower Peninsula, on Lake Saint Clair. We lived out in the country, at a time when there was still some of it around, and the woods spread as far as you could see. Other than the main road, everything was dirt. The road that this story takes place on is not far from my childhood home. I can’t say for sure if it is true or not. Some people insist that it is, while others insist it is just a made-up story. I never saw it but that does not mean it is not real. So here is the tale of my hometown ghost. It took place in Algonac, on Marrow Road. The story behind the road is that a woman went out in the middle of a winter night to try to find her toddler, who had somehow gotten out alone. Sadly, they both froze solid in the cold. If you park on the bridge at midnight and honk your car horn three times, she will appear to see if you have her baby. She is also said to be wearing a white gown at times and carrying her baby. At other times, a green light will hover and chase people away.” -Author Unknown
Overheard: I have seen things . . . awful things . . . empty coffee cup things . . .
Horror stories and scary tales can have unstated morals - stories about haunted houses can keep people from trespassing in abandoned properties, which are often unsafe and can result in injury, typically from such things as people falling through floors with rotten floorboards, or old rafters and beams falling on people. Can you think of other possibly unsafe places that horror stories might protect people from?
This story comes from the early twentieth century. Some of you may be old enough to remember the twentieth century. It happened in the life of a man named Jedidiah Jeremiah. As he tells it, “I inherited an estate in New Hampshire from my grandmother on my father’s side of the family. The house was a twenty-bedroom mansion. Large orchards covered the property. I stayed in the mansion to watch over the property until it could be sold at auction. I slept in the only heated part of the mansion, the servants’ quarters adjoining the kitchen. At nights, just before dawn, while I slept, my covers would be pulled off. After a few nights, this became tiresome, so I lay awake in bed one night, and when the covers began to be pulled off me, I pulled back. I became involved in a tug-of-war with some things that growled at me. I jumped up in terror, stood up on top of the mattress, and threw the covers on the floor at the foot of the bed. After that, for the remaining nights, I stayed in a hotel several miles away. I drove to the estate during the day. I arrived early one morning to look over the bedroom, and in the closet I found some loose floorboards that I pulled up. Underneath was a sort of tunnel leading through a crawl space to the outside of the mansion, with the orchards just a few hundred yards beyond. A few days following, while in the nearby town, I looked up the old cook. I mentioned the nighttime goings on.” “That,” he said, “Would have been the tree imps. They were waking you to let you know to begin preparations for breakfast.” “Tree imps?” I said. “Yes, the souls of the poor departed servants, staying on to care for the orchards, house, and grounds of the estate.”
In the Dark
In the dark, dark world
There’s a dark, dark, country;
In the dark, dark, country,
There are dark, dark woods;
In the dark, dark woods
There’s a dark, dark house;
And in the dark, dark house
There’s a man trying to find the circuit breaker!
by Author Unknown
For a frightfully good time, read Maurice Sendaks’ book “Where the Wild Things Are” (9 April 1963). This children’s picture book is 40 pages long and has just 338 words. It is available from your local public library or bookseller or on the interwebs.
End It Your Way!
There was a young lady from Norway
Who saw something strange in a doorway.
What she saw she won’t say,
But her red hair turned gray,
Now won’t you just end it your way?
by Author Unknown
“The witching hour, somebody had once whispered to her, was a special moment in the middle of the night when every child and every grown-up was in a deep, deep sleep, and all the dark things came out from hiding and had the world all to themselves.” -Roald Dahl (1916 - 1990): “The BFG” (1982)
Would it be better to have a horrible ending, or to have horrors without end?
A Gruesome Story
Do you want to hear a gruesome story?
A farmer planted a pumpkin seed.
He watered it and cared for it very well,
And soon it grew some, and grew some!
by Author Unknown
Some time ago, a woman who was an up-and-coming nature photographer decided to spend a day and a night alone in the woods outside of town. She wanted to get photos of the woods and wildlife as naturally as she could, for her portfolio. She was not afraid of being alone, as she had camped by herself many times before. She set up a tent in the middle of a small clearing and spent the day taking pictures. She filled up two memory cards on that trip, but something was strange about them. What she saw in those pictures has stayed with ever since, and she is still trying to recover from the trauma they have caused her . . . almost every picture was accounted for, save for one picture in each memory card. These pictures were of her, asleep in her tent in the middle of the night.
Emma: What would you get if you crossed scary stories with nursery rhymes?
Esmeralda: Mother Goosebumps.
A man stood on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm. As the night went by no cars passed him. The storm was so strong, he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car come towards him and stop. The guy, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door, only to realize that nobody was behind the wheel. The car started slowly. The guy looked at the road and saw a curve coming his way. Scared, he started praying, and begged for his life. He hadn’t come out of shock, when just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched as the hand appeared every time just before a curve. The guy gathered his strength, got out of the car, and ran to the nearest town. Wet from the falling rain and in shock, he ran into a diner and asked for a glass of water, and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he had gone through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized the guy was crying and seemed sincere. About half an hour later, two guys walked into the same diner, and one said to the other, “Look, that’s the guy who climbed into the car while we were pushing it.”
“Monsters are real and ghosts are real. They live inside us and sometimes they win.” -Stephen King (born 1947)
A young American tourist went on a guided tour of a creepy old castle. At the end of the tour, the guide asked her if she enjoyed it. She admitted to being a bit worried about seeing a ghost in some of the dark cobweb-lined rooms and passages. “Don’t worry,” said the guide, “I’ve never seen a ghost in all of the time I’ve been here.” “How long is that?” asked the girl. “About four hundred years.”
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Antigonish
“Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn’t there!
He wasn’t there again today,
Oh how I wish he’d go away!”
When I came home last night at three,
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall,
I couldn’t see him there at all!
Go away, go away, don’t you come back any more!
Go away, go away, and please don’t slam the door . . .
Last night I saw upon the stair,
A little man who wasn’t there,
He wasn’t there again today
Oh, how I wish he’d go away . . .
by William Hughes Mearns (1875 - 1965): “The Psyco-ed” (1899)
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Poltergeists: Bothersome ghosts that make noises and make objects move.
Poultrygeists: Haunted chickens.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ghoul.
Ghoul, who?
Ghoul D. Locks . . . and the Three Scares!
This is MFOL! . . . weird and wonderful fun . . .
A couple was walking home after a Halloween party, and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tap sound coming from the misty shadows. Trembling with fear, they discovered an old man with a hammer and chisel was chipping away at one of the headstones. “Hey, Mister,” the guy said after catching his breath, “You scared us half to death - we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working out here so late at night?” “Those fools!” the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name!”
Overheard: If people in horror movies would only listen to me, they might be able to escape!
A man was walking home alone late one night when he heard a BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . behind him. Walking faster, he looked back, and made out the image of an upright coffin banging its way down the middle of the street towards him. BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . Terrified, the man began to run towards his home, the coffin bouncing quickly behind him . . . faster . . . faster . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . BUMP . . . He ran up to his door, fumbled with his keys, opened the door, rushed in, slammed and locked the door behind him. However, the coffin crashed through his door, with the lid of the coffin clapping . . . clappity-BUMP . . . clappity-BUMP . . . clappity-BUMP . . . on the heels of the terrified man. Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locked himself in. His heart was pounding; his head was reeling; his breath was coming in sobbing gasps. With a loud crash, the coffin started breaking down the door . . . Bumping and clapping towards him. The man screamed and reached for something heavy, anything . . . his hand came to rest on a roll of cough drops. Desperate, he threw the cough drops as hard as he could at the apparition . . . and . . . the coffin stopped! Why, you ask? Because, as everyone knows, cough drops stop the coffin!
Earth itself is a horror story in a terrifying Universe. Here is just one example that proves it: Lightning strikes the planet about 6,000 times every minute, and little gray-green creatures called television repairmen run around all over the planet, chasing the lightning to try to catch it - what, that isn’t true at all?
“I grew up in Michigan on the Lower Peninsula, on Lake Saint Clair. We lived out in the country, at a time when there was still some of it around, and the woods spread as far as you could see. Other than the main road, everything was dirt. The road that this story takes place on is not far from my childhood home. I can’t say for sure if it is true or not. Some people insist that it is, while others insist it is just a made-up story. I never saw it but that does not mean it is not real. So here is the tale of my hometown ghost. It took place in Algonac, on Marrow Road. The story behind the road is that a woman went out in the middle of a winter night to try to find her toddler, who had somehow gotten out alone. Sadly, they both froze solid in the cold. If you park on the bridge at midnight and honk your car horn three times, she will appear to see if you have her baby. She is also said to be wearing a white gown at times and carrying her baby. At other times, a green light will hover and chase people away.” -Author Unknown
Overheard: I have seen things . . . awful things . . . empty coffee cup things . . .
Horror stories and scary tales can have unstated morals - stories about haunted houses can keep people from trespassing in abandoned properties, which are often unsafe and can result in injury, typically from such things as people falling through floors with rotten floorboards, or old rafters and beams falling on people. Can you think of other possibly unsafe places that horror stories might protect people from?
This story comes from the early twentieth century. Some of you may be old enough to remember the twentieth century. It happened in the life of a man named Jedidiah Jeremiah. As he tells it, “I inherited an estate in New Hampshire from my grandmother on my father’s side of the family. The house was a twenty-bedroom mansion. Large orchards covered the property. I stayed in the mansion to watch over the property until it could be sold at auction. I slept in the only heated part of the mansion, the servants’ quarters adjoining the kitchen. At nights, just before dawn, while I slept, my covers would be pulled off. After a few nights, this became tiresome, so I lay awake in bed one night, and when the covers began to be pulled off me, I pulled back. I became involved in a tug-of-war with some things that growled at me. I jumped up in terror, stood up on top of the mattress, and threw the covers on the floor at the foot of the bed. After that, for the remaining nights, I stayed in a hotel several miles away. I drove to the estate during the day. I arrived early one morning to look over the bedroom, and in the closet I found some loose floorboards that I pulled up. Underneath was a sort of tunnel leading through a crawl space to the outside of the mansion, with the orchards just a few hundred yards beyond. A few days following, while in the nearby town, I looked up the old cook. I mentioned the nighttime goings on.” “That,” he said, “Would have been the tree imps. They were waking you to let you know to begin preparations for breakfast.” “Tree imps?” I said. “Yes, the souls of the poor departed servants, staying on to care for the orchards, house, and grounds of the estate.”
In the Dark
In the dark, dark world
There’s a dark, dark, country;
In the dark, dark, country,
There are dark, dark woods;
In the dark, dark woods
There’s a dark, dark house;
And in the dark, dark house
There’s a man trying to find the circuit breaker!
by Author Unknown
For a frightfully good time, read Maurice Sendaks’ book “Where the Wild Things Are” (9 April 1963). This children’s picture book is 40 pages long and has just 338 words. It is available from your local public library or bookseller or on the interwebs.
End It Your Way!
There was a young lady from Norway
Who saw something strange in a doorway.
What she saw she won’t say,
But her red hair turned gray,
Now won’t you just end it your way?
by Author Unknown
“The witching hour, somebody had once whispered to her, was a special moment in the middle of the night when every child and every grown-up was in a deep, deep sleep, and all the dark things came out from hiding and had the world all to themselves.” -Roald Dahl (1916 - 1990): “The BFG” (1982)
Would it be better to have a horrible ending, or to have horrors without end?
A Gruesome Story
Do you want to hear a gruesome story?
A farmer planted a pumpkin seed.
He watered it and cared for it very well,
And soon it grew some, and grew some!
by Author Unknown
Some time ago, a woman who was an up-and-coming nature photographer decided to spend a day and a night alone in the woods outside of town. She wanted to get photos of the woods and wildlife as naturally as she could, for her portfolio. She was not afraid of being alone, as she had camped by herself many times before. She set up a tent in the middle of a small clearing and spent the day taking pictures. She filled up two memory cards on that trip, but something was strange about them. What she saw in those pictures has stayed with ever since, and she is still trying to recover from the trauma they have caused her . . . almost every picture was accounted for, save for one picture in each memory card. These pictures were of her, asleep in her tent in the middle of the night.
Emma: What would you get if you crossed scary stories with nursery rhymes?
Esmeralda: Mother Goosebumps.
A man stood on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm. As the night went by no cars passed him. The storm was so strong, he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car come towards him and stop. The guy, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door, only to realize that nobody was behind the wheel. The car started slowly. The guy looked at the road and saw a curve coming his way. Scared, he started praying, and begged for his life. He hadn’t come out of shock, when just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched as the hand appeared every time just before a curve. The guy gathered his strength, got out of the car, and ran to the nearest town. Wet from the falling rain and in shock, he ran into a diner and asked for a glass of water, and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he had gone through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized the guy was crying and seemed sincere. About half an hour later, two guys walked into the same diner, and one said to the other, “Look, that’s the guy who climbed into the car while we were pushing it.”
“Monsters are real and ghosts are real. They live inside us and sometimes they win.” -Stephen King (born 1947)
A young American tourist went on a guided tour of a creepy old castle. At the end of the tour, the guide asked her if she enjoyed it. She admitted to being a bit worried about seeing a ghost in some of the dark cobweb-lined rooms and passages. “Don’t worry,” said the guide, “I’ve never seen a ghost in all of the time I’ve been here.” “How long is that?” asked the girl. “About four hundred years.”
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Antigonish
“Yesterday, upon the stair,
I met a man who wasn’t there!
He wasn’t there again today,
Oh how I wish he’d go away!”
When I came home last night at three,
The man was waiting there for me
But when I looked around the hall,
I couldn’t see him there at all!
Go away, go away, don’t you come back any more!
Go away, go away, and please don’t slam the door . . .
Last night I saw upon the stair,
A little man who wasn’t there,
He wasn’t there again today
Oh, how I wish he’d go away . . .
by William Hughes Mearns (1875 - 1965): “The Psyco-ed” (1899)
<O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O> <O>
Poltergeists: Bothersome ghosts that make noises and make objects move.
Poultrygeists: Haunted chickens.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ghoul.
Ghoul, who?
Ghoul D. Locks . . . and the Three Scares!
This is MFOL! . . . weird and wonderful fun . . .