The Spoken Word And Speaking

“The best conversationalists are curious about everything. That’s why they are good at listening and why they have broad horizons - they’re always learning something new.” -Larry King
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“Words fail me. Thank goodness I can make gestures.” -Mark Hughes
 
“Communication - the human connection - is the key to personal and career success.” -Paul J. Meyer (Paul James Meyer, Senior (1928 - 2009)) at https://PaulJMeyer.com/
 
“Whenever I meet people for the first time, I assume that they have a great story to tell and that it’s my job to find it.” -Sarah, Duchess of York (born Sarah Margaret Ferguson in 1959): “What I Know Now: Simple Lessons Learned the Hard Way” (2003)
 
In spoken communications, which includes conversations, there are two main parts: 1. Speaking, and 2. Listening. Ideally, each participant spends some time speaking and some time listening.
 
Sign in a shop: For Your Convenience, Our Staff Is Fluent In Monosyllabic Grunts!
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“Conversation takes practice; the more we do it, the better we get, and the more easily we do it.” -Susan RoAne (born Susan Rosenberg in about 1945) at https://www.susanroane.com/
 
“There is a disease terrible that strikes 10 out of 1 people 15 every minutes. Vocal Dyslexia it’s called. An elment I’ve been lifing all my fight. It can warn without striking and has no regard for case, read, or crolor. Symptoms include speechaled garb, backs coming out wordward, and an inability to sent a complete putence together. The victims: innocent people like thou and me. Sadly, Vocal Dyslexia is wilding liek spreadfire and there is no cureful symp, butthere is hope. The dyslexia foundation has recommended these things 3: 3rd: at the first trub of signale phonsult a confition; 2nd: stay in bed and drink flenty of pluids; 1st: read as can as you much. For more information write: 999 Teenfifth Street, Grand Mapids, Ricaghan. Thank you muchy ver.” -Author Unknown
 
“Conversations are the most direct way to connect with people.” -Padgett Powell
 
“Every conversation is an opportunity for success.” -Debra Fine
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“Conversation may be compared to a lyre with seven chords - philosophy, art, poetry, love, scandal, and the weather.” -Anna Brownell Jameson (1794 - 1860)
 
Overheard: Say it straight, simple, and with a smile.
 
“The first ingredient in conversation is truth, the next, good sense, the third, good humor, and the fourth, wit.” -William Temple (1628 - 1699)
 
“A conversation is so much more than words, a conversation is eyes, smiles, the silences between words.” -Annika Thor
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“A soft answer turneth away wrath.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in “The Bible,” ‘Proverbs,’ chapter 15, verse 1
 
How To Be A Good Conversationalist
- Make eye contact.
- Allow the other person to speak his or her mind.
- Ask questions and allow the other person to answer.
- Do not interrupt a person when he or she is speaking if at all possible.
- Use polite words and do not use offensive language such as cursing and swearing.
- Do not use slang, jargon, abbreviations, or other nonstandard and obscure terms or words.
- Show an interest in what the other person is saying.
- Speak in a calm, civil tone.
- Be agreeable even when you disagree.
- Be polite so that you always leave them liking you.
What can you add to this list?
 
“When trying to make your way through a crowd of people, and you find that saying, ‘Excuse me,’ or ‘Pardon me,’ isn’t getting you anywhere, just say, ‘Beep, beep!’ because everybody, regardless of language or dialect, speaks and understands car.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
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“Fine words butter no parsnips.” -Walter Scott (1771 - 1832)
 
“Keep your conversation throughout the day consistent with what you really want to happen.” -Brian Tracy (born 1944) at https://www.briantracy.com
 
Be careful of the words you say,
     And keep them soft and sweet.
For you never know from day to day,
     Which ones you’ll have to eat.
-Author Unknown
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“Talk is cheap, and that’s why barbers give it away for free with haircuts.” -Author Unknown
 
“After all, when you come right down to it, how many people speak the same language even when they speak the same language?” -Russell Hoban (Russell Conwell Hoban (1925 - 2011))
 
“When in doubt, mumble.” -Author Unknown
 
“Conversation is an exchange of thoughts that leave all parties to it a grain wiser.” -Alfred Whitney Griswold (Alfred Whitney ‘Whitney’ Griswold 1906 - 1963)
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“It does seem so pleasant to talk with an old acquaintance who knows what you know. I see so many new folks nowadays who seem to have neither past nor future. Conversation has got to have some root in the past, or else you have got to explain every remark you make, and it wears a person out.” -Sarah Orne Jewett (1849 - 1909)
 
THINK Before You Speak
 
T: Is it True?
H: Is it Helpful?
I: Is it Inspiring?
N: Is it Necessary?
K: Is it Kind?
 
By Author Unknown
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“For millions of years, mankind lived just like the animals. Then something happened which unleashed the power of our imagination. We learned to talk.” -Stephen Hawking (Stephen William Hawking (1942 - 2018))
 
“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.” -Robert McCloskey
 
“Learning to speak, therefore, and the power it brings of intelligent converse with others, is a most impressive further step along the path of independence.” -Maria Montessori
 
“I’m trying to elevate small talk to medium talk.” -Larry David
 
“Things cat people do: You answer your cat’s random meows with, ‘Yes, yes, I know!’” -Author Unknown
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“Language was given to us that we might say pleasant things to each other.” -Author Unknown
 
“Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.” -Robert Benchley (Robert Charles Benchley (1889 - 1945))
 
“The best of life is conversation, and the greatest success is confidence, or perfect understanding between sincere people.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
“Grunts and squeals were fine in the beginning, but eventually humans needed more precise means of communication . . . and so, words were invented, which were a combination of grunts and squeals.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
 
“There are two kinds of people who don’t say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.” -Author Unknown
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On average, women say 7,000 words per day. Men on average manage slightly more than 2,000 words in a day. However, this is neither good nor bad. Men and women are different, and therefore do things differently based on their plans and goals. Women place priority in connections with other people, which they do primarily through communication. Men place importance in accomplishment, using communication primarily as a means to that end, and in fact, are quite likely to talk while at the same time doing something.
 
“A great conversation is the bridge between minds.” -Author Unknown
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“If you want to be a good conversationalist, be a good listener. To be interesting, be interested.” -Dale Carnegie (Dale Harbison Carnegie (born Dale Breckenridge Carnagey (1888 - 1955)))
 
“Everyone hears only what they understand.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
 
“Speech is a mirror of the soul; as a man speaks, so is he.” -Publilius Syrus (85 B.C.E. - 43 B.C.E.): as attributed in Darius Lyman: “The Moral Sayings of Publius Syrus, a Roman Slave: From the Latin” (1856): “Sententiae,” Maxim 1073
 
“Be brave enough to start a conversation that matters.” -Margaret Wheatley
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And I oft have heard defended -
Little said is soonest mended.
-George Wither (1588 - 1667): “The Shepherd’s Hunting” (1615)
 
“I felt it shelter to speak to you.” -Emily Dickinson (1830 - 1886)
 
“A single conversation across the table with a wise man is better than ten years’ mere study of books.” -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882): “Hyperion” (1839), Chapter VII
 
“Eventually it may be possible for humans to speak with another species.” -John Lily: “Man and Dolphins” (1961)
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“If you have learned how to disagree without being disagreeable, then you have discovered the secret of getting along - whether it be in business, family relations, or life itself.” -Bernard Meltzer (Bernard C. Meltzer (1916 - 1998))
 
“Men’s conversation is like their life.” [translation to English]
“Talis hominibus est oratio qualis vita.” [original Latin]
-Lucius Annaeus Seneca (also known as Seneca the Younger (3 B.C.E. - C.E. 65)): “Epistolæ Ad Lucilium,” 114
 
“Speech is conveniently located midway between thought and action, where it often substitutes for both.” -John Andrew Holmes (1773 - 1843): “Wisdom in Small Doses” (1927)
 
“Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable.” -David Augsburger (David W. Augsburger (born 1938))
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“The time to stop talking is when the other person nods his head affirmatively but says nothing.” -Author Unknown
 
“Before you say something, stop and think how you’d feel if someone said that to you.” -Author Unknown
 
“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in “The Bible,” ‘Book of Proverbs,’ chapter 25, verse 11
 
“The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” -Dorothy Nevill (Dorothy Fanny Nevill (1826 - 1913)): “Under Five Reigns” (1910), page 26
 
“Don’t take up a man’s time talking about the smartness of your children; he wants to talk to you about the smartness of his children.” -Edgar W. Howe (Edgar Watson ‘Ed’ Howe, also known as E. W. Howe (1853 - 1937)): “Country Town Sayings” (1911)
 
Riddle: What can you break with just one word?
Answer: Silence.
 
“While the spoken word stands for something, the written word stands for something that stands for something.” -Author Unknown
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“If nobody spoke unless they had something to say, the human race would very soon lose the use of speech.” -W. Somerset Maugham (William Somerset Maugham (1874 - 1965))

“He had occasional flashes of silence that made his conversation perfectly delightful.” -Sydney Smith (1771- 1845)
 
“Before beginning any conversation, ask yourself if this is the proper time, place, and person to have the conversation with. If you use wild hand gestures when you talk, make an effort to keep your hands under control so that you do not appear to be physically menacing or ridiculous to the other person. Understand that you have goals in talking to people, and they also have their goals, and the best conversations are those in which both people move closer to achieving their goals.” -Author Unknown
 
“Chatter is not quite conversation.” -Charles M. Schulz (Charles Monroe ‘Sparky’ Schulz (1922 - 2000))
 
“There is no conversation more boring than the one where everybody agrees.” -Michel de Montaigne (Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533 - 1592))
 
“Speak properly, and in as few words as you can, but always plainly; for the end of speech is not ostentation, but to be understood.” -William Penn (1644 - 1718)
 
“People should talk less and draw more. Personally, I would like to renounce speech altogether and, like organic nature, communicate everything I have to say visually.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
 
“There are three things in speech that ought to be considered before some things are spoken - the manner, the place, and the time.” -Robert Southey (1774 - 1843): as attributed in S. Austin Allibone: “Prose Quotations from Socrates to Macaulay” (1880)
 
“When we speak harshly or yell at people, the words can hit their ears so hard that they bounce right off them and are not heard, or are interpreted by their instinctual defenses as threats. If we speak reasonably and calmly, we have a chance of being heard and understood.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
 
“I can hold conversations by myself. What do you call this?” -Alice Oseman (Alice May Oseman (born 1994)): “Solitaire” (2014) book
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“Everyone should be quick to listen. Slow to speak.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in “The Bible” (NIV), ‘James,’ chapter 1, verse 19
 
“We have two ears and only one tongue in order that we may hear more and speak less.” -Diogenes Laërtius (lived about C.E. 3rd century)
 
“The secret of success in conversation is to be able to disagree without being disagreeable.” -Author Unknown
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Plato: What can you hold without ever touching it?
Aristotle: A conversation.
 
“In conversation avoid the extremes of forwardness and reserve.” -Marcus Porcius Cato (also known as Cato the Elder (233 B.C.E. - 148 B.C.E.)): as quoted in “Hoyt’s New Cyclopedia of Practical Quotations” (1922), page 137
 
“The words you speak today should be soft and tender, for tomorrow you may have to eat them.” -Author Unknown
 
“Conversation is the image of the mind; as the man, so is his speech.” [translation to English]
“Sermo animi est imago; qualis vir, talis et oratio est.” [original Latin]
-Publilius Syrus (also known simply as Syrus (85 B.C.E. - 43 B.C.E.)): “Maxims”
 
“Life is a conversation. Make it a good one.” -Glennon Doyle Melton
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“We’re always talking about talking, but we never seem to get around to actually talking.” -Author Unknown
 
“To disagree, one does not have to be disagreeable.” -Barry M. Goldwater and Jack Casserly: “Goldwater” (12 October 1988)
 
“Contradiction and flattery both make poor conversation.” -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)
 
“The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man’s observation, not overturning it.” -Edward Bulwer-Lytton (Edward George Earle Lytton Bulwer-Lytton (1803 - 1873))
 
“One way to prevent conversation from being boring is to say the wrong thing.” -Frank Sheed
 
“If you want to be listened to, you should put in time listening.” -Marge Piercy (born 1936)
 
“Conversation means being able to disagree and still continue the discussion.” -Dwight MacDonald
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“The value of the average conversation could be enormously improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know.” -André Maurois (born Émile Salomon Wilhelm Herzog (1885 - 1967))
 
“Some people live in harsh surroundings filled with difficult or impossible people, and so they have lost the ability to engage in conversation and can only do what everyone around them is doing, which is to ‘bark’ at people. Because people do not like to be barked at, they stop listening to each other, and when problems arise, solutions are never found.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
 
“One good conversation can shift the direction of the change forever.” -Linda Lambert
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“Miss not the discourse of the elders.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in “The Bible,” ‘Ecclesiaticus,’ chapter VIII, verse 9
 
“To listen closely and reply well is the highest perfection we are able to attain in the art of conversation.” -François de La Rochefoucauld (also known as François Duc de La Rochefoucauld (1613 - 1680))
 
“It was mortifying to find how strong the habit of idle speech may become in one’s self. One need not always be saying something in this noisy world.” -Sarah Orne Jewett (1849 - 1909): “The Country of Pointed Firs and Other Fiction” (1896)
 
“A gossip is one who talks to you about others; a bore is one who talks to you about himself; and a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself.” -Lisa Kirk (born Elsie Kirk (1925 - 1990))
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“There is only one rule for being a good talker: learn to listen.” -Christopher Morley (Christopher Darlington Morley (1890 - 1957)): as quoted in Herbert V. Prochnow and Herbert V. Prochnow, Junior, editors: “A Treasury of Humorous Quotations” (1969)
 
“Ultimately the bond of all companionship, whether in marriage or in friendship, is conversation.” -Oscar Wilde (Oscar Fingal O’Flahertie Wills Wilde (1854 - 1900))
 
With good and gentle humour’d hearts
I choose to chat where e’er I come;
Whate’er the subject be that starts . . .
-John Byrom: “Miscellaneous Poems by John Byrom” (1773), Volume I, page 78, ‘Careless Content,’ Stanza II
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“Change the conversation of the world by dwelling on what’s gone right.” -Mary Anne Radmacher (born 1957)
 
We are MFOL! . . . now let us all engage in happy talk, serious talk, silly talk . . . or we could just make wild animal noises . . .