Serious Topics

Introduction & Contents

4/22/2017

The ‘Make Fun Of Life!’ Website is dedicated to survivors, who live with the effects of trauma in their lives daily, and to all individuals seeking the best of that which is worth knowing in life.

Welcome to the ‘Serious Topics’ page. What will you find here?

• Words Heal
• Difficult Pasts
• Difficult Presents
• Difficult Futures
• Child Abuse

More topics are now in development and will be published when completed, and the presently published topics will be improved over time.

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Words Heal

4/21/2017

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“When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold. They believe that when something’s suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful.” -Barbara Bloom

The Japanese word ‘kintsukuroi’ means ‘to repair with gold.’ Kintsukuroi is the art of repairing broken pottery with gold or silver lacquer. The breakage and repair become part of the history of the object, making it more beautiful with its imperfections . . . like so many people’s lives.

“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” -Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931): “The Broken Wings” (1912)

“Life is terribly deficient in form. Its catastrophes happen in the wrong way and to the wrong people.” -Oscar Wilde (pseudonym of Fingal O’Flahertie Wills (1854 - 1900))

“When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.” -Author Unknown

“Every piece of the Universe, even the tiniest little snow crystal, matters somehow. I have a place in the pattern, and so do you . . .” -T. G. Barron

Have you ever heard the expression, “Words wound”? It is true, they do. Words can crush, destroy, disparage. But, the right words can also reassure, calm, guide, uplift, validate . . . words can do wonders.

“The sunniest lives have seasons of shadow.” -Author Unknown

“Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn’t people feel as free to rejoice in whatever sunshine remains to them?” -Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy

Whatever your conditions, you will find comfort in words. Let us share some good words here, making this a place you can turn to when you need something to occupy your mind and lessen the bad memories, worries, doubts, and fears; something to hold onto when the nightmares and flashbacks and panic and anxiety and loneliness and frustrations come.

“Not all scars show, not all wounds heal. Sometimes you can’t always see the pain someone feels.” -Jennifer Shin

A wretched soul, bruis’d with adversity,
We bid be quiet, when we hear it cry;
But were we burthen’d with like weight of pain,
As much, or more, we should ourselves complain.
-William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616): “The Comedy of Errors” (1594), ‘Adriana,’ act I, scene ii

Would you commit just one positive thought to memory today? Repeat it a few times, try to remember it a few times, and it can be yours forever.

“Broken wings mend in time, and you will fly again.” -Author Unknown

“Courage is the price that Life exacts for granting peace.” -Amelia Earhart (Amelia Mary Earhart (1897 - 1937))

“The scars you can’t see are the hardest to heal.” -Astrid Alauda

“Let your heart feel for the distress and affliction of everyone.” -George Washington (1732 - 1799)

“When tragic things begin to seem funny, health has begun.” -Author Unknown

“Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.” -Les Brown (Lester Louis Brown)

“God will not look you over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars.” -Author Unknown

“Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.” -James Matthew Barrie (1860 - 1937)

“A new wound makes all the old ones ache again.” -Mignon McLaughlin (1913 - 1983): “The Neurotic’s Notebook” (1960)

“I would like to learn, or remember, how to live.” -Annie Dillard (born in 1945): “Teaching a Stone to Talk” (1982), page 15

“Don’t let a bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.” -Author Unknown

“It is easy to look at people and make quick judgements about them, their presents and their pasts, but you would be amazed at the pain and tears a single smile can hide. What people show to the world is only a tiny facet of the iceberg hidden from sight. And more often than not, it is lined with cracks and scars that go all the way through to the foundation of their souls. Never judge in haste; learn to understand, respect, and acknowledge the feelings of others.” -Author Unknown

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’” -Mary Anne Radmacher

“The world is round, and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.” -Ivy Baker Priest

“Find a place inside where there’s joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.” -Joseph Campbell (1904 - 1987)

“Strong people are made by opposition, like kites that go up against the wind.” -Frank Harris (1856 - 1931)

“Whatever you do in this world, no matter how good it is, you will never be able to please everybody. All you can strive for is to do the best it is humanly possible for you to do.” -Jeri Ferris: “What I Had Was Singing”

I am you, contacting you from the future, to tell you that everything will be okay if you will just try to do your best today.

“Associate reverently, and as much as you can, with your loftiest thoughts.” -Henry David Thoreau

“Don’t accept that others know you better than yourself.” -Sonja Friedman

“The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love.” -Hubert Humphrey (Hubert Horatio Humphrey, Junior (1911 - 1978))

“Don’t despair; even the sun has a sinking spell every night, but it rises again in the morning.” -Author Unknown

“I’ve seen what a good laugh can do. It can transform tears into hope.” -Bob Hope (1903 - 2003)

“All service ranks the same with God.” -Robert Browning (1812 - 1889)

“Submarine navigators tell us that no storms ever reach very deep into the ocean. The water is perfectly calm a hundred feet down, no matter how high the breakers may rise on the surface. There is a quietude in the depths that no surface storms can disturb. This is possible, too, in human lives - there can be serenity and peace within, undisturbed by the storms of the world.” -Author Unknown: “The Morning Herald” (14 April 1959), page 4; newspaper of Uniontown, Pennsylvania, United States of America

“Life wounds all of us, to greatly varying degrees.” -Author Unknown

“When it gets dark enough, you can see the stars.” -Charles Austin Beard (1874 - 1948)

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts.” -Winston Churchill (Winston Leonard Spenser Churchill (1874 - 1965))

“After the darkness, light.” [English translation]
“Post tenebras lux.” [original Latin]
-John Calvin (1509 - 1564)

“In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer. And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger - something better, pushing right back.” -Albert Camus (1913 - 1960): “Lyrical and Critical Essays” (1968)

“Words are our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both inflicting injury and remedying it.” -J. K. Rowling: “Harry Potter,” line spoken by character Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.” -Agatha Christie (Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie (1890 - 1976))

“A sorrow shared is but half a trouble, and a joy that’s shared is a joy made double.” -Arthur Donne

“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else.” -Charles Dickens (Charles John Huffam Dickens (1812 - 1870))

“I can stick up for myself. I can be on my own side.” -Nola Langner: “By the Light of the Silvery Moon” (1983)

“Time alone does not heal our wounds.” -Author Unknown

“Every winner has scars.” -Robert N. C. Nix

“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.” -Author Unknown

“Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps, then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.” -Rainer Maria Rilke (René Karl Wilhelm Johann Josef Maria Rilke (1875 - 1926)): “Letters to a Young Poet” (1929)

“Scars remind us of where we’ve been. They don’t have to dictate where we’re going.” -Author Unknown: “Criminal Minds,” Season 5, Episode 10 (9 December 2009); line spoken by character David Rossi

“Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.” -Helen Keller (Helen Adams Keller (1880 - 1968))

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo Buscaglia (Felice Leonardo ‘Leo’ Buscaglia, also known as Leo F. Buscaglia (1924 - 1998))

“The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.” -C. C. Scott

“The mind which does not wholly sink under misfortune rises above it more lofty than before, and is strengthened by affliction.” -Richard Chenevix (1774 - 1830): “An Essay Upon National Character” (1832), book I, part II, chapter III

“Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” -Victor Hugo (1802 - 1885)

“The strength will with the burden grow.” -Tom Taylor: “Abraham Lincoln” (1865), stanza 9, line 1, as quoted in the “London Punch” and in Edmund Clarence Stedman: “A Victorian Anthology” (1895); type of work: poem

“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.” -Kahlil Gibran (1883 - 1931)

“The prettiest smiles hide the deepest secrets. The prettiest eyes have cried the most tears. And the kindest hearts have felt the most pain.” -Author Unknown

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” -Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1926 - 2004)

“Cast your stones, cast your judgement, you don’t make me who I am.” -Author Unknown

“Those who have suffered understand suffering and therefore extend their hand.” -Pattie Smith

Strength is born
In the deep silence of long-suffering hearts;
Not amidst joy.
-Felicia Hemans (1793 - 1835): “The Siege of Valencia” (1823)

“From every wound there is a scar, and every scar tells a story. A story that says, ‘I survived.’” -Craig Scott

Bad things happen but that does not mean that you stop living or that you stop trying. Bit by bit you find the strength, the will, and the courage to begin again.

“The world breaks everyone and afterward some are stronger in the broken places.” -Ernest Hemingway (Ernest Miller Hemingway (1899 - 1961))

“It gets easier.” -Author Unknown

“I’ve got dreams in hidden places and extra smiles for when I’m blue.” -Author Unknown

“The challenges of life never cease, but our ability to face them gets better as time goes by.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

Would you like to help us build up and improve the ‘Words Heal’ topic? Please email us at MakeFunOfLife@mail.com. Now go have the best imaginable day, and continue to MFOL!

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Difficult Pasts

4/20/2017

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“Regardless of your past, your future is a clean slate.” -Author Unknown

“Let the past as nothing be.” -Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)

“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” -C. S. Lewis (Clive Staples Lewis (1898 - 1963))

Following are healing words for people whose funny bones have been broken on the bumpy road of life.

No longer forward nor behind
I look in hope and fear;
But grateful take the good I find,
The best of now and here.
-John Greenleaf Whittier (1807 - 1892)

“Don’t judge me by my past. I don’t live there anymore.” -Author Unknown

“Never be ashamed of a scar. It simply means you were stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.” -Author Unknown

“The people and places and circumstances that broke you will not be the ones that fix you. You must find something else.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“It has been said that time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue, and the pain lessens, but it is never gone.” -Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy

“The past . . . We may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to escape what is bad in it, but we will escape it only by adding something better to it.” -Wendell Berry

“Look back, and smile on perils past.” -Walter Scott (1771 - 1832)

“I am better than I was. I’ll be better than I am.” -Author Unknown

“The past does not define you, the present does.” -Jillian Michaels

“Some doors are best left closed.” -George R. R. Martin

“I’ve had so many knives stuck into me, when they hand me a flower I can’t quite make out what it is. It takes time.” -Charles Bukowski (1920 - 1994): “Sarcasm from the Balcony” (5 June 1993)

“Forgetting is the cost of living cheerfully.” -Zoë Akins (Zoë Byrd Akins (1886 - 1958))

“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” -Maya Angelou (Marguerite Ann Johnson (1928 - 2014))

For lo, the winter is past,
the rain is over and gone;
the flowers appear on the earth;
the time of the singing of birds is come,
and the voice of the turtledove
is heard in our land.
-Author Unknown: “The Bible,” ‘Song of Solomon,’ chapter 2, verses 11 and 12

“I admire people who choose to shine even after all the storms they’ve been through.” -Author Unknown

“As memory may be a Paradise from which we cannot be driven, it may also be a Hell from which we cannot escape.” -John Lancaster Spalding

“Running away from your past without a place to go is a race you can never win because it never ends. You will always be worn down and remain broken if that is what you continue to do. You must instead try to find temporary safety and sanctuary, places where you can build yourself up and grow strong. Stop running, long enough to look around for something to run toward, because none of us can run forever. You must find the places where you can build a life for yourself.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“Make peace with your past so that it doesn’t spoil your present.” -Author Unknown

“Life is a weird journey.” -Author Unknown: “The Pretender” (1996 - 2000), ‘Nip and Tuck’ (6 December 1997); line spoken by character Jerod; type of work: television series

Some Examples of People with Difficult Pasts
- Post-Traumatic Stress Survivors
- Child Abuse Survivors
- Domestic Abuse Survivors
- Traumatic Incident Survivors
- Long-term Trauma Survivors
- Abduction Survivors
- Hostage Survivors
- Crime Victims
- Can you add to this list?

“Whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come. Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome.” -Author Unknown

Re-examine what you have been taught;
Discard what wounds your soul.
-Walt Whitman (1819 - 1892)

“Smile and let everyone know that today, you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday.” -Author Unknown

“Maybe it’s not always about trying to fix something broken. Maybe it’s about starting over and creating something better.” -Author Unknown

“The past cannot be changed, but the future is still in your power.” -Hugh White

Waste no tears
Upon the blotted record of lost years,
But turn the leaf, and smile, oh! smile, to see
The fair white pages that remain for thee.
-Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850 - 1919): “Poems of Passion” (1883)

“Your past is not your identity . . . You, living now, is your identity.” -George Lawrence-Ell: “The Invisible Clock” (2001)

“You may not be where you want to be, but you can look back and be thankful you’re not where you used to be.” -Joel Osteen

“One of the things which danger does to you after a time is -, well, to kill emotion. I don’t think I shall ever feel anything again except fear. None of us can hate anymore - or love.” -Graham Greene (1904 - 1991): “The Confidential Agent” (1939)

“A difficult past does not mean the difficulties are past . . . years and decades later, we may still live with the effects. And, if that is the case, then the only way we can ever get past the difficulties of the past is by some actions we ourselves must take.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“The best way to forget the bad things in life is to learn to remember the good things.” -Mark Amend

“I know well what I am fleeing from but not what I am in search of.” -Michel de Montaigne (Michel Eyquem de Montaigne (1533 - 1592)): “Essais” (“Essays”) (March 1580), Book 3, chapter 9

“You will find it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are too heavy.” -Corrie ten Boom (Cornelia ‘Corrie’ ten Boom (1892 - 1983))

“What happened in the past that was painful has a great deal to do with what we are today.” -William Glasser

Live in the Present

One day at a time
this is enough.
Do not look back
and grieve over the past
for it is gone;
and do not be troubled
about the future
for it has not yet come.
Live in the present
and make it so beautiful
that it will be worth
remembering!

-Author Unknown

“A drowning man will grab even the point of a sword.” -Author Unknown

“I’ve never met a strong person with an easy past.” -Author Unknown

“The past does not have to be your prison. You have a choice in your destiny. You have a say in your life. You have a choice in the path you take.” -Max Lucado (born in 1955): “When God Whispers Your Name” (1994)

“If you let go of the past, it no longer has a hold on you.” -Author Unknown

“Your past doesn’t determine your future.” -Mike Litman

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” -Carl Bard

“It doesn’t matter where you’ve been, only where you are going.” -L. M. Fields

“Think forward! Concentrate on who you want to be and where you want to go, not on who you were or where you’ve been.” -Michael Josephson

“Someone once asked me how I hold my head up so high after all I have been through. I said it’s because no matter what, I am a survivor, not a victim.” -Patricia Buckley

“That which cannot be repaired is not to be regretted.” -Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784): “Rasselas” (1759), chapter IV

“There is a way to look at the past. Don’t hide from it. It will not catch you - if you don’t repeat it.” -Pearl Bailey

“When looking back doesn’t interest you anymore, you’re doing something right.” -Author Unknown

“To get over the past, you first have to accept that the past is over. No matter how many times you revisit it, analyze it, regret it, or sweat it . . . it’s over. It can hurt you no more.” -Mandy Hale

“Sometimes I wish I could go back and tell myself what I know now.” -Author Unknown

“The past has no power over the present moment.” -Eckhart Tolle

“There comes a point when it’s best to stop trying to make sense out of things that just don’t make any sense.” -Author Unknown

“Living from fears created as a result of your past will just weigh you down. Just because something bad happened before, doesn’t mean it will again.” -Lisa Prosen

“Stop holding on to what hurts. Reach for what makes you feel happy.” -Author Unknown

“How you see your future is much more important than what has happened in the past.” -Zig Ziglar (Hilary Hinton ‘Zig’ Ziglar (1926 - 2012))

“We do not heal the past by dwelling there. We heal the past by living in the present.” -Marianne Williamson (born in 1952)

“From the ashes of your past come the bright stars of your future.” -Melvin Lewis Thomas

“Forget what hurt you, but never forget what it taught you.” -Author Unknown

“Do not let the past hold you back; you will miss all the good stuff.” -Author Unknown

“I am not what has happened to me. I am what I choose to become.” -Carl Jung (Carl Gustav Jung (1875 - 1961))

“Perhaps we have lost the lesson of a Biblical event. When Lot’s wife turned to look back, she was turned into a pillar of salt, and any of us likewise can be immobilized by spending too much time considering the past - trying to figure out its meaning, wondering what might have been had it all been different, trying to answer the question, ‘Why me?’ We must not allow ourselves to be turned into forever frozen pillars of contemplation; we must go ever forward with our lives.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“Do not look back with regret; look forward with hope.” -Author Unknown

“You never get to fix the past. All you can do is to get as far away from it as possible.” -Elizabeth Blair

“The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you cannot go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.” -Author Unknown

“If you focus on what you have left behind, you will never be able to see what lies ahead.” -Author Unknown

“There’s no reason to look back when you have so much to look forward to.” -Author Unknown

“Whatever your past has been, you have a spotless future.” -Melanie Gustafson

“Forget the past and live the present hour.” -Sarah Knowles Bolton

“Shut out all of your past except that which will help you weather your tomorrows.” -William Osler (1849 - 1919)

“If you must look back, do so forgivingly. If you must look forward, do so prayerfully. However, the wisest thing you can do is be present in the present . . . Gratefully.” -Maya Angelou (Marguerite Ann Johnson (1928 - 2014))

What a long, strange journey it has been . . . but no matter what your past, your future can be one of opportunities and possibilities . . . and your future begins this very moment . . . and continues anew in each moment that follows . . . so that you can begin writing the story of your life . . . with your hand holding the pen.

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Difficult Presents

4/19/2017

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“You may not always be where you want to be, but you’re somewhere. It is in where you choose to go from here that your true potential lies.” -Author Unknown

“Life is tough, my darling, but so are you.” -Stephanie Bennett Henry

“The situation you live in doesn’t have to live in you.” -Roberta Flank

“The willow knows what the storm does not: that the power to endure harm outlives the power to inflict it.” -Author Unknown: “Blood of the Martyr,” card illustrated by Christopher Rush (1965 - 2016)

“Don’t let the low times keep you down. Learn from them and reach for the high times.” -David Wiemers

“Know that the pain will pass, and when it does you will be stronger.” -Author Unknown

“Your present situation is not your final destination. The better and the best is yet to come.” -Author Unknown

“You have to believe that the best will happen.” -Lacy Richardson

“Life is a circle of happiness, sadness, hard times, and good times. If you are going through hard times have faith that good times are on the way.” -Author Unknown

“There are only two remedies for the suffering of the soul: hope and patience.” -Pythagoras (Pythagoras of Samos (about 570 B.C.E. - about 495 B.C.E.))

“Everything is going to be all right, maybe not today, but eventually.” -Author Unknown

“Just because your world is falling apart doesn’t mean you have to fall apart. When everything seems crazy, you be calm. Don’t let the outer chaos you are facing get inside of you.” -Bryant McGill (born in 1969)

“Even the darkest night will end and the Sun will rise.” -Victor Hugo (Victor Marie Hugo (1802 - 1885)): “Les Misérables”

“If I am not for myself, who will be?” -Pirke Avoth

“Look for something positive in each day, even if some days you have to look a little harder.” -Author Unknown

“Keep fighting. Stay strong. Your life may feel like a mess right now, but there will be an end to this part.” -Author Unknown

“Press on! A better fate awaits thee.” -Victor Hugo (Victor Marie Hugo (1802 - 1885))

“Sometimes you just have to bow your head, say a prayer, and weather the storm.” -Author Unknown

“When life is viewed as good, a bad day is easily absorbed.” -Neil A. Maxwell

“Perhaps I am stronger than I think.” -Thomas Merton

“Endure, and preserve yourself for better things.” -Vergil (Publius Vergilius Maro, also known as Virgil (70 B.C.E. - 19 B.C.E.))

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass . . .
It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.
-Vivian Greene

“The darkest hour has only sixty minutes.” -Morris Mandel

“There is nothing we cannot live down, rise above, and overcome.” -Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850 - 1919)

“Expect to have hope rekindled. Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways. The dry seasons in life do not last. The spring rains will come again.” -Sarah van Breathnach

If I Can Endure

If I can endure for this minute
whatever is happening to me
No matter how heavy my heart is
or how dark the moment might be . . .
If I can but keep on believing what
I know in my heart to be true,
That darkness will fade with morning
and that this will pass away, too . . .
Then nothing can ever disturb me
or fill me with uncertain fear,
For as sure as night brings dawning,
my morning is bound to appear . . .

-Author Unknown

“Sometimes the strongest among us are the ones who smile through silent pain, cry behind closed doors, and fight battles nobody knows about.” -Author Unknown

“Here is a test to find whether your mission on Earth is finished: If you’re alive, it isn’t.” -Richard Bach (born in 1936): “Illusions” (1977), chapter 15

“I wish I could go back to a time when I could smile and it didn’t take everything in me to do it.” -Author Unknown

“Someday, we’ll forget the hurt, the reason we cried, and who caused us pain. We will finally realize that the secret of being free is not revenge, but letting things unfold in their own way and own time. After all, what matters is not the first, but the last chapter of our life, which shows how well we ran the race. So smile, laugh, forgive, believe and live all over again.” -Author Unknown

“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.” -Maya Angelou (1928 - 2014)

“Even in the bleakest times there are gifts to be discovered.” -Jann Mitchell

You fall, you rise, you
make mistakes, you live
you learn. You’re human
not perfect. You’ve been
hurt, but you’re alive.
Think of what a precious
privilege it is to be alive -
to breath, to think, to
enjoy, and to chase the
things you love.
Sometimes there is
sadness in our journey,
but there is also lots of
beauty. We must keep
putting one foot in front of
the other even when we
hurt, for we will never
know what is waiting for
us just around the bend.
-Author Unknown

“Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.” -Author Unknown

“Endure, and keep yourself for days of happiness.” -Mary Englebreit

“The best bridge between despair and hope is a good night’s sleep.” -E. Joseph Cossman

Tomorrow is a new day.

“The truth is, no matter what your current circumstances, if you can imagine something better for yourself, you can create it.” -John Assaraf

Would you like to help us build up and improve the ‘Difficult Presents’ topic? Please email us at MakeFunOfLife@mail.com. This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . many people have been where you are now in life and have gone on to live lives better than they ever could have imagined would be possible . . .

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Difficult Futures

4/18/2017

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What lies ahead is uncertain . . . it always has been . . . you have made it to this time and place . . . and you can do it again . . .

“Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.” -Marcus Aurelius (Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (C.E. 121 - C.E. 180)): “The Meditations” (C.E. 167)

“It’s not the future that you’re afraid of. It’s repeating the past that makes you anxious.” -Author Unknown

“The best way to prepare for the future is to take care of the present.” -Author Unknown

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” -Eleanor Roosevelt (Anna Eleanor ‘Eleanor’ Roosevelt (1884 - 1962))

“You’ll never know how strong you are . . . until being strong is the only choice you have.” -Author Unknown

“Why should we refuse the happiness this hour gives us, because some other hour might take it away?” -John Hobbes

“Don’t try to live too many days at a time.” -Harold B. Lee

“One day, I realized that life was too short to worry about what might happen, so I decided to live in the moment and follow my heart.” -Author Unknown

“An uncertain future leaves us stranded in an unhappy present with nothing to do but wait.” -Peter Bregman

“Don’t confuse your path with your destination. Just because it’s stormy now doesn’t mean that you aren’t headed for sunshine.” -Author Unknown

“Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive about what could go right.” -Author Unknown

“You have a disagreeable duty to do at 12 o’clock. Do not blacken nine and ten and eleven, and all between, with the color of twelve. Do the work of each and reap your reward in peace. So when the dreaded moment in the future becomes the present, you shall meet it walking in the light, and that light will overcome its darkness.” -George MacDonald (1824 - 1905)

“Trust yourself. You have survived a lot and you will survive whatever is coming.” -Author Unknown

“I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today!” -Friedrich Nietzsche (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844 - 1900))

Would you like to help us build up and improve the ‘Difficult Futures’ topic? Please email us at MakeFunOfLife@mail.com. This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . wishing you many trouble-free days as you step into a future of endless possibilities . . .

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Child Abuse

4/17/2017

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“It shouldn’t hurt to be a child.” -Jan Hunt

“I was brought up in a very poor and very violent household. I spent much of my childhood being afraid.” -Patrick Stewart (born in 1940)

“Children have a certain amount of natural resiliency, the ability to withstand and recover from injury that has been inflicted upon them. Abused children have often lost that resiliency because what happened to them was extremely severe, and usually repeated over a period of years. They were psychologically broken by their abusers. Typically, this loss of resiliency is carried into adulthood. The question is, how can abused children and adult survivors of child abuse recover their resiliency so that they can live their lives without every small injury causing them to reel back and withdraw from life?” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” -Frederick Douglass (1817 - 1895)

“Child abuse casts a shadow the length of a lifetime.” -Herbert Ward

“Wounded children have a rage, a sense of failed justice, that burns in their souls. What do they do with that rage? Since they would never harm another, they turn that rage inward. They become the target of their own rage. They repeat in their thoughts the same harmful words that were spoken to them. They must lash out, but the only ones weak enough to attack are themselves.” -Woody Haiken

“There’s no excuse for child abuse.” -Author Unknown

“Childhood should be carefree, playing in the sun, not living a nightmare in the darkness of the soul.” -Dave Pelzer: “A Child Called It” (1995); type of work: autobiography; the author’s website is www.davepelzer.com.

“Abuse of any one generally shows that he has marked traits of character. The stupid and indifferent are passed by in silence.” -Tryon Edwards (1809 - 1894): as quoted in Tryon Edwards: “A Dictionary of Thoughts: Being a Cyclopedia of Laconic Quotations from the Best Authors of the World, both Ancient and Modern” (1908)

“The scars you can’t see are the hardest to heal.” -Astrid Alauda

“Treat yourself with care, compassion, acceptance, and respect, like you would a best friend, and celebrate the precious person that you are!” -Author Unknown

“Life can be wonderful at times. Life can also be extremely harsh, and to stand up against its harshness requires that we have substantial outer and inner defenses. Throughout your lifetime, you will encounter people who are abusive, overly critical, hostile, and even a threat to your physical well-being. Every one of us without exception will experience these things. Ours is a world of giving and taking offense, as individuals and groups with differing ideas meet. So, given this reality, how do we make life wonderful? How do we become stronger?” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“Parentage is a very important profession, but no test of fitness for it is ever imposed in the interest of the children.” -George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)

“The hearts of small children are delicate organs. A cruel beginning in this world can twist them into curious shapes. The heart of a hurt child can shrink so that forever afterward it is hard and pitted as the seed of a peach. Or, again, the heart of such a child may fester and swell until it is misery to carry within the body, easily chafed and hurt by the most ordinary things.” -Carson Smith McCullers (1917 - 1967): “The Ballad of the Sad Café” (1951)

“Children need models more than they need critics.” -Joseph Joubert (1754 - 1824): “Collected Thoughts of Mr. Joubert” (published posthumously in 1838)

“If there are things you don’t like in the world you grew up in, make your own life different.” -David Thomas

“Once I got over my anger and rage from childhood, once I stopped feeling like a victim, I was able to open myself to great resources of learning.” -Georges Saint-Pierre

“Whether to forgive or to not forgive is something for you alone to decide, and not for someone else to command you to do. However, when it comes to whether to forget or to not forget, the choice to not forget means that you will remember what happened and you will not allow abuse to be part of your life ever again - not against you or against anyone else, nor will you allow yourself or anyone else to be an abuser or a victim, ever.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“What we remember from childhood we remember forever - permanent ghosts, stamped, inked, imprinted, eternally seen.” -Cynthia Ozick
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Truth

Sticks and stones may beak my bones
but words can also hurt me.
Stones and sticks break only skin,
while words are ghosts that haunt me.

Slant and curved the word-swords fall
to pierce and stick inside me.
Bats and bricks may ache through bones
but words can mortify me.

Pain from words has left its scar
on mind and heart that’s tender.
Cuts and bruises now have healed
it’s words that I remember.

-Author Unknown
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“The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.” -Max Lerner (1902 - 1992): “The Unfinished Country” (1959)

“There are no illegitimate children, only illegitimate parents.” -Léon R. Yankwich (1888 - 1975): as quoted in the “Los Angeles Times” (9 August 1928) newspaper

Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865) was a survivor of child abuse. Yet despite getting off to a rough start in life, he went on to achieve greatness, freeing those held as slaves, and bringing the United States of America back together again as one nation that had been divided by the American Civil War.

“There is a difference between discipline and abuse. Discipline is an attempt to teach a child right from wrong. Abuse is an attempt to make a child live in fear.” -Author Unknown
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“Spare the rod and spoil the child.” -Author Unknown: “The Bible,” ‘Book of Proverbs,’ chapter 13, verse 24

Explanation: The scripture does not mean to beat a child with a rod as some folks might imagine, but to guide a child with a rod, as a shepherd guides sheep down the right path by blocking a wrong path with a rod (also called a staff; a long heavy stick). Spoil means ‘to harm the character of someone by over-indulgence.’ A modern interpretation of the scripture might be, “If you do not use proper guidance and loving discipline, you ruin a child’s development.” Remember, it is a harsh shepherd who beats sheep with a rod, and an irresponsible one who lets the sheep run off in every direction to where the wolves will prey upon them.
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“Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well.” -Martin Luther (1483 - 1546)

April of each year is Child Abuse Prevention Month.

“You can find the happiness you never knew as a child. First, though, you may have to go through a long period of trying to find out what happiness is, because you may not yet know, possibly having not really experienced it for sure.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

“Most American children suffer from too much mother and too little father.” -Gloria Steinem: as quoted in the “New York Times” (26 August 1971)

“The popular idea that a child forgets easily is not an accurate one. Many people go right through life in the grip of an idea which has been impressed on them in very tender years.” -Agatha Christie (Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie (1890 - 1976))

Types of Child Abuse
- Emotional abuse.
- Exploitation.
- Mental abuse.
- Munchausen’s by Proxy
- Neglectful abuse.
- Physical abuse.
- Can you think of other types of child abuse?

“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.” -John Trainer

“People who belittle and demean you, criticize and insult you, pick you apart and judge you, are the most negative and toxic people alive. Then when you stand up for yourself, they try to tell others that you are the ‘toxic’ one. They say this because they cannot stand it when you no longer allow them to run all over you and treat you like trash. They cannot admit their own horrible behavior, so they try to make it look like it is all your fault.” -Author Unknown

“Children exposed to violence in their family show the same pattern of activity in their brains as soldiers exposed to combat.” -Author Unknown

“It is easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult.” -Author Unknown
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I Do Not Know Who I Am

I try to look inside but who do I see,
I see a shell that is supposed to have been Me,
I was not able to Grow,
I was not able to See,
I was not able to be Free,

A prison of Pain and a Wall of Hurt,
I feel like I should Be Living in Dirt,
But I am not going to let You Stop Me,
You will not see the Pain You brought Me,
One Day, I will truly be Me.

-Author Unknown
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“Many survivors blame themselves for the abuse and continue to feel responsible and guilty for anything bad that happens to them or to other people they know. Survivors often feel bad about themselves and different from other people. They therefore isolate themselves from other people and avoid making close friendships.” -Carolyn Ainscough and Kay Toon: “Breaking Free” (2000)

“You can spend a lifetime trying to forget a few minutes of your childhood.” -Author Unknown

“Children should be seen and heard and believed.” -Author Unknown

“There is hope for all survivors of child abuse to heal and to lead well-rounded, fulfilling lives. We can know true joy, happiness, and satisfaction in our lives, and come to know anger, sadness, and other emotions to a more balanced degree. We can hold jobs, develop careers, marry, raise healthy children, and participate in society. We can laugh, sing, dance, love, like, and be what we were always meant to be . . . full-fledged human beings . . . we are, after all, members of the most amazing species in the known Universe, with unlimited potential, in a world of endless possibilities.” -Nathan Thomas Taylor (born in 1966)

We prize your participation. You can send quotations, poems, and other material suitable for inclusion in this topic to MakeFunOfLife@mail.com . . . imagine a much nicer world . . .

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You Are Okay

4/16/2017

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