Road Crossings

Jane: Why did the goose cross the road?
Jillian: Because the light was green.
 
Gladys: How do you avoid that rundown feeling?
Clementine: Always look both ways before crossing the road!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Accidents and Safety” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Gregory: Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road?
Megan: Because it ran out of juice.
 
Stop, Look, and Listen
 
I stop, I look, I listen,
Before I cross the street.
     I use my eyes,
     I use my ears,
And then,
     I use my feet!
 
by Author Unknown
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Poetic Epigrams” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Austin: How did the egg cross the road?
Ozzie: It scrambled across.
 
Octavius: Why did the frog hop across the road?
Augustus: To see what the chicken was doing!
 
Margaret: Why did the bad speller cross the road?
Margery: Too get two the other side.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Word Spellings” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Ticket Against Jaywalking Chicken. Ridgecrest, California: A chicken that got a ticket for crossing the road has clawed his way out of it. The $54 (RM205.20) citation for impeding traffic was dismissed after Linc and Helena Moore’s attorney argued that the fowl was domesticated and could not be charged as livestock. State law restricts livestock on highways, but not domestic animals. The chicken was ticketed on 26 March for impeding traffic after it wandered onto a road in Johannesburg, a rural mining town southeast of Ridgecrest. -AP
 
Patrice: Why did it take so long for the elephant to cross the road?
Tricia: Because the chicken had trouble carrying him.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Elephants” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Artemus: Why couldn’t the hyena cross the road?
Gordon: He was too busy laughing himself silly at that last joke. 
 
Bobby: Why did the cat cross the road?
Darin: The chicken had to take a day off to rest after carrying the elephant across.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Domestic Cats” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Karl: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Ludwig Wittgenstein: The possibility of ‘crossing’ was encoded into the objects ‘chicken’ and ‘road,’ and circumstances came into being which caused the actualization of this potential occurrence.
 
Wilbur: Did you hear about the two kangaroos that crossed the road?
Orville: Yes, they jumped into each other’s pouches and were never seen again.
 
Timmy: Why did the raccoon cross the road?
Tammy: Because she was chasing the chicken.

A chicken crossing the road is ‘poultry in motion.’ But why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it sort of happened this way . . .
 
Carla: Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
Marlene: She wanted to stretch her legs.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Physical Fitness and Exercising” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Barbara: Why did the chicken cross the amusement park?
Candace: To get to the other ride.
 
Earl: Why did the procrastinator cross the road?
Lee: Because it was supposed to have been done two months ago!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Humor And Inspiration And Learning About Procrastination And Procrastinating” Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Harpo Marx: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Groucho Marx: Chicken? What is all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost left him, but we needed the eggs!
 
Boris: Why did the monster help the little old ghoul across the road?
Doris: Because that is what fiends are for.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Monsters” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Justin: Why did the cell cross the microscope?
Dustin: To get to the other slide.
 
Millicent: Why did the polar bear cross the road?
Lucinda: To show the alligator that it could be done.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Animals and Animal Natures” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Maryanne: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Gilligan: The traffic started getting rough, the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail, the chicken would be lost . . . The chicken would be lost!
 
Paul: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Saul: I don’t know
Paul: To get to your house!
. . . long awkward pause . . .
Paul: Knock, knock.
Saul: Who’s there?
Paul: It’s the chicken from the last joke!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Knock-Knock Jokes” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Minerva: What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?
Minnie: Catching the chickens as they crossed the road.
 
Bernard: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Leonard: Just for the fun of it!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Humor And Inspiration And Learning About Playtime And Playing” Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
 
First Lab Tech: Why did the function cross the road?
Second Lab Tech: Because it was defined on both sides and continuous.
 
Kimberly: Why did the rooster cross the road?
Kimmy: He wanted something to crow about.
 
Bernie: Why did the cows cross the road?
Bonnie: Because they are always on the moo-ve.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Cattle” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Percival: Why did the snake slither across the road?
Perry: To get to the other sss-sss-sss-side!

Adrienne: Why did the happy couple cross the road?
Addie: So they could get their picture on www.MakeFunOfLife.net!
 
Henry David Thoreau: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Ralph Waldo Emerson: The chicken did not merely cross the road - the chicken transcended it.
 
Artie: Why did the cookie cross the road?
Marty: To dunk itself in a glass of milk.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Mealtimes and Eating” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Eudora: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Reuben: To get to the other side.
 
Curtis: Why did Captain Hook cross the road?
Howard: To get to the secondhand shop
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Pirates” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Agyrophobia, also called dromophobia, is a persistent fear of roads or of crossing roads. Even when no motor vehicles are present, some sufferers from this affliction still experience intense fear. Agyrophobia comes from the Greek words ‘gyrus’ meaning ‘turning’ or ‘whirling’ and ‘phobos’ meaning ‘fear,’ while dromophobia is derived from the Greek words ‘dromos’ meaning ‘running’ and ‘phobos’ meaning ‘fear.’ One of the things that could be said about the chicken that crossed the road is that he was not chicken to cross the road - and you should not be either.
 
Rhoda: Why did the penguin cross the road?
Ronda: Because the chicken owed it $5.
 
Tina: Why did the sheep cross the road?
Lena: To get to the baaa-baaa shop for a trim.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Barbers and Hairstylists” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Doctor Leonard Horatio McCoy: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Captain James Tiberius Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before!
 
Amy: Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Annie: She was trying to catch a boomerang.
 
Beatrice: Why did the pigs cross the road with their laundry?
Tricia: They wanted to do their hogwash.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Pigs and Hogs” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Tabitha: Why did the rabbit cross the road?
Christina: To get to the hopping mall.
 
Buzz Aldrin: Have you heard that a chicken has finally crossed the road?
Neil Armstrong: That is one small step for a chicken . . . one giant leap for all poultry-kind.
 
Jesse: Why did the duck cross the road?
Bessie: To visit the chicken of course!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Ducks” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Jasper: Why did the chicken cross the internet?
Casper: To get to the Make Fun Of Life! Website at www.MakeFunOfLife.net.
 
Nick: Why did the seal cross the road?
Vick: To get to the otter side.
 
Marcella: Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip?
Marc: To get to the same side.

Decker: How did the chewing gum get across the road?
Archer: By sticking to the bottom of a shoe.
 
Marv: Why did the shoe cross the road?
Irv: Because it’s on your foot.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Humor And Inspiration And Learning About Shoes And Footwear” Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
 
George: Why did the comedian cross the road?
Jerry: To get to the punchline!
 
Siskel: I don’t know why the chickens crossed the road, but I loved it. Thumbs up!
Ebert: I disagree. The whole thing left the audience wondering; the chickens’ crossing the road was never clearly explained, and the chickens didn’t emote very well. Thumbs down.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Criticism and Criticizing” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Julian: Why did the turkey cross the road?
Jillian: To go, “Gobble, gobble! Gobble, gobble!” on the other side.
 
Hugh: Why did the horse cross the road?
Bert: He wanted to visit his neigh-bors.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Horses and Ponies” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Phillip: Why did the monkey cross the road?
Ophelia: To show he was not chicken.
 
In Quitman, Georgia, United States of America, chickens are actually prohibited by law from crossing the road.
 
Petula: Why did the chicken nearly stop crossing the road?
Clark: It got tired of everyone making so many jokes!
 
Sonny: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Grandpa: In my day, we did not ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us. And that chicken would have had to walk barefoot five miles in the snow just to get to that road, too. They just do not make chickens like that anymore!
 
Luigi: Why did the tachyon cross the road?
Louellen: Because it was on the other side.
 
Can’t get enough of “Why did the chicken cross the road?” Here are a few more: Because . . . the pedestrian sign was flashing “WALK” and the road was clear of moving vehicles; Farmer Brown was across the road calling out, “Here, chick-chick-chick, here, chick-chick-chick,” while tossing corn around on the ground; go ask your mother; go ask your father; to catch the “L” train; to try the new hot ‘n’ spicy bacon double cheeseburger; to catch the show; she had a bee in her bonnet; to take a closer look at the cow; to feather her nest; to see what was on the other side; because at the time it seemed like a good idea; the sky was falling; to catch a falling star; to buy a copy of the new horror novel “Chicken Soup for the Human Soul”; to try to look important; to make a new friend; she was lost and headed in the wrong direction; to try something new; they told her there was a ham sandwich in it for her; to escape global warming; to escape the coming ice age; she was a good and faithful friend; I’m listening; oh, I love you so much; what was the question again?; it’s a little complicated; the other chickens said it couldn’t be done; we would have to look at it from the chicken’s perspective; what was the question again?; she’d already been around the block; to see what she could see; it’s a bit of a mystery, isn’t it?; she knew she’d give the farmer nightmares for years to come; another chicken gave her an odd look; I can’t comment on an ongoing investigation; why don’t we go find out; she was certainly a funny bird, that one; truth be told, nobody really knows . . . 
 
Mitchell: Why did the turtle cross the road?
Shelia: To get to the shell station.
 
Arlene: What happened when the skunks argued while crossing the road?
Aileen: They raised a big stink.

Shelby: Why did the snail cross the road?
Nellie: I don’t know, she hasn’t gotten there yet.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Snails” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Eunice: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Eustice: Because the other chickens egged her on.
 
Tips for Safely Crossing Roads
- Stop, look, and listen.
- Wait until the signal shows “WALK” or a human figure lights up.
- Hold hands and stay together.
- Always look both ways before crossing the road.
- Look left, then right, then left again.
- Stay in the crosswalk.
- Cross at intersections and do not cross at other places.
- Be aware that drivers sometimes drive when and where they should not because they are not good drivers.
- Can you think of other tips for safely crossing roads?
 
Silvia: Why did the dog cross the road?
Ingrid: To get to the barking lot.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Domestic Dogs” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Larry: Why did the kiwi fruit run across the road?
Lawrence: Because it was being chased by a pineapple.
 
Charlotte: Why did the ambitious man cross the road?
Shelly: Because he was chasing his dreams.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Inspiration and Motivation” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Road Crossings Quiz: Who Am I?
1. I waddle across the road.
2. I bounce or roll across the road.
3. I inch across the road.
4. I dribble across the road.
5. I flow across the road.
 
Lenny: Why did the scientist cross the road?
Squiggy: Centrifugal force.
 
Road Crossings Quiz Answers: Who Am I?
1. I am a duck and I waddle across the road.
2. I am a ball and I bounce or roll across the road.
3. I am an inchworm and I inch across the road.
4. I am a basketball player and I dribble a basketball across the road.
5. I am water and I flow across the road.
 
Chubby: Why did the fat man cross the road?
Tubby: To get some exercise.
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Fun and Learning about Weight Loss and Weight Maintenance” gathered by David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Carl: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Claire: Because the early bird catches the worm!
 
One of the things that can be said about the chicken that crossed the road is that it was not chicken to cross the road - and you should not be either. Be courageous, and have new adventures every day, just like that little feathery chicken!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Humor And Inspiration And Learning About Fears And Courage” Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
 
Emily: Why did the spider cross the road?
Amelia: To get to its other web site.
 
Mirabelle: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Mabelle: She was excited at the possibility of new adventures!
Continue scrolling down this website page to read the rest of the article, or click or tap on these words to read “Humor And Inspiration And Learning About Adventure And Exploration” Gathered By David Hugh Beaumont.
 
We are MFOL . . . may you have many safe and happy road crossings . . .