At the end of the day, you can take your catch home . . . with full bragging rights . . .
Grace and her grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in the garden. Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his grandmother. “No, honey, he won’t do for bait,” she said. “He’s not an earthworm.” “He’s not?” Eddy asked, his eyes wide. “What planet is he from?”
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishing
When I go fishing
I’m always wishing
Some fish will be my prize;
But while I’m fishing,
The fish are wishing
Otherwise.
And all the wishes
Of all the fishes
Seem always to come true;
So all my wishes
To catch some fishes
Never do.
by Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
“Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime.” -Author Unknown
One way to tell the age of a fish is by looking at its scales. Fish have growth rings just as trees do. The growth rings on fish are called circuli, and clusters of circuli are called annuli. Each annuli marks one year of life in a fish. Somewhere out there might be somebody who knows what all of this means.
“Nothing makes a fish bigger than almost being caught.” -Author Unknown
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle, and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two. “Oh, yes,” he said. “They’re my friends.” “In that case,” warned the officer, “you’d better get them out of here.” “Yes, sir,” the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.
“If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.” -Doug Larson (1902 - 1981)
“Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Give a fish a man, and he’ll eat for weeks!” -Toshihiro Kawabata
Fisherman Fisher
A fitful young fisher named Fisher
Once fished for some fish in a fissure,
Till a fish, with a grin,
Pulled the fisherman in -
Now they’re fishing the fissure for Fisher!
by Author Unknown
“The fishing was good, it was the catching that was bad.” -A. K. Best
“Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.” -Zenna Schaffer
How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb? Seven - and you should have seen the size of that light bulb. It was this long . . . Seven of us were almost not enough; we could barely handle it!
Fishing has been around for a long time. The oldest fishhook found so far dates back to about 42,000 years ago. Do you think the fish were any bigger back then?
“You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish, but they do want to make it late for something. ‘Where were you?’ ‘I got caught!’ ‘I don’t believe you, let me see the inside of your lip.’” -Mitch Hedberg
“Give a man a fish, and it will feed him for a day; give a man a fishing rod, and he will sell it for more fish, or burn it for firewood.” -Jon Culshaw
A five-year-old boy had gone fishing with his grandmother. After an hour or so, his grandmother asked him, “Are you having any luck?” He replied indignantly, “No, I don’t think my worm is really trying.”
James: What do you call a couple who go fishing together?
Elijah: Rod and Annette.
A fisherman accidentally dropped his wallet into the water, and was amazed to see a school of carp deftly balancing the wallet on their heads and tossing it from one fish to another. “Golly,” said the fisherman, “that’s the first time I’ve ever seen carp-to-carp walleting.” (pun on ‘wall-to-wall carpeting’)
Grace and her grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in the garden. Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his grandmother. “No, honey, he won’t do for bait,” she said. “He’s not an earthworm.” “He’s not?” Eddy asked, his eyes wide. “What planet is he from?”
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishing
When I go fishing
I’m always wishing
Some fish will be my prize;
But while I’m fishing,
The fish are wishing
Otherwise.
And all the wishes
Of all the fishes
Seem always to come true;
So all my wishes
To catch some fishes
Never do.
by Author Unknown
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
“Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish and he eats for a lifetime.” -Author Unknown
One way to tell the age of a fish is by looking at its scales. Fish have growth rings just as trees do. The growth rings on fish are called circuli, and clusters of circuli are called annuli. Each annuli marks one year of life in a fish. Somewhere out there might be somebody who knows what all of this means.
“Nothing makes a fish bigger than almost being caught.” -Author Unknown
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle, and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two. “Oh, yes,” he said. “They’re my friends.” “In that case,” warned the officer, “you’d better get them out of here.” “Yes, sir,” the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.
“If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.” -Doug Larson (1902 - 1981)
“Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Give a fish a man, and he’ll eat for weeks!” -Toshihiro Kawabata
Fisherman Fisher
A fitful young fisher named Fisher
Once fished for some fish in a fissure,
Till a fish, with a grin,
Pulled the fisherman in -
Now they’re fishing the fissure for Fisher!
by Author Unknown
“The fishing was good, it was the catching that was bad.” -A. K. Best
“Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.” -Zenna Schaffer
How many fishermen does it take to change a light bulb? Seven - and you should have seen the size of that light bulb. It was this long . . . Seven of us were almost not enough; we could barely handle it!
Fishing has been around for a long time. The oldest fishhook found so far dates back to about 42,000 years ago. Do you think the fish were any bigger back then?
“You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish, but they do want to make it late for something. ‘Where were you?’ ‘I got caught!’ ‘I don’t believe you, let me see the inside of your lip.’” -Mitch Hedberg
“Give a man a fish, and it will feed him for a day; give a man a fishing rod, and he will sell it for more fish, or burn it for firewood.” -Jon Culshaw
A five-year-old boy had gone fishing with his grandmother. After an hour or so, his grandmother asked him, “Are you having any luck?” He replied indignantly, “No, I don’t think my worm is really trying.”
James: What do you call a couple who go fishing together?
Elijah: Rod and Annette.
A fisherman accidentally dropped his wallet into the water, and was amazed to see a school of carp deftly balancing the wallet on their heads and tossing it from one fish to another. “Golly,” said the fisherman, “that’s the first time I’ve ever seen carp-to-carp walleting.” (pun on ‘wall-to-wall carpeting’)
Why not make fishing a family affair?
“Caution is a most valuable asset in fishing, especially if you are a fish.” -Author Unknown
“Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll buy a funny hat.” -Author Unknown
Fish can be frozen, canned, and smoked to build a stockpile of food for the winter season.
“The first rule of fishing: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.” -Author Unknown
Give a man a fish, and he has food for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he has to buy fishing licenses, park passes, rods, reels, fishing lines, hooks, tackle boxes, lures, spinners, sinkers, bobbers, nets, bait, knives, hats, fishing vests, fish finders, depth sounders, boats, outboard motors, gas cans, trailers, global positioning systems, ice chests, bags of ice, waders, buckets, sunglasses, sunscreen lotions, first aid kits, floatation vests, sandwiches, beverages, fishing pliers, cameras, binoculars, weight scales, tape measures, folding chairs, a 4-wheel drive vehicle, bumper stickers, ropes . . . did we forget anything?
“A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other.” -Samuel Johnson
The Good Lord Sends the Fishing
Sitting still and wishing
Made no person great;
The good Lord sends the fishing,
But you must dig the bait.
by Author Unknown
To catch a Swedish fish . . . use a gummy worm. (A ‘Swedish fish’ is a candy.)
“Let your hook be always cast, for a fish lurks even in the most unlikely waters.” -Ovid (Publius Ovidius Naso)
The Fishing Pole
A fishing pole’s a curious thing,
It’s made of just a stick and string;
A boy at one end and a wish,
And on the other end a fish.
by Mary Caroline Davies
“The fish does not go after the hook, but after the bait.” -Author Unknown: Czech proverb
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they will not bother you for weeks.
“Most of the world is covered by water. A fisherman’s job is simple: Pick out the best parts.” -Charles Waterman
“Fish: An underwater creature that grows fastest between when it is caught and the time the fisherman describes it to his friends.” -Author Unknown
“Bragging may not bring happiness, but no man having caught a large fish goes home through an alley.” -Ann Landers
Bret: How do you get your little sister to find so many worms for you when you want to go fishing?
Bert: Oh, that’s easy. Out of every ten she digs up, I let her have one to eat.
“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Unless he doesn’t like sushi - then you also have to teach him to cook.” -Auren Hoffman
Kel: Are you fishing?
Cal: No, just teaching worms to swim.
Fish
One, two, three, four, five,
I caught a fish alive.
Six, seven, eight, nine, ten,
I let him go again!
Why did I let him go?
Because he bit my finger so.
Which finger did he bite?
The little one on the right.
by Author Unknown
Once upon a time, there was a fisherman who was always talking about the giant fish he almost caught. One day he took his two sons, Toward and Away, fishing with him. That night, he returned more excited than ever. “Honey,” he yelled to his wife, “you should have seen the fish I saw today. A tremendous green fish, ten feet long, with horns and fur all over its back. It came crawling out of the water, snatched our son Toward, and swallowed him in one gulp!” “Good gracious!” exclaimed his wife. “That’s horrible!” “Oh, that was nothing,” said her husband. “You should have seen the one that got Away!”
“The two best times to fish is when it’s rainin’ and when it ain’t.” -Patrick F. McManus
“Caution is a most valuable asset in fishing, especially if you are a fish.” -Author Unknown
“Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he’ll buy a funny hat.” -Author Unknown
Fish can be frozen, canned, and smoked to build a stockpile of food for the winter season.
“The first rule of fishing: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.” -Author Unknown
Give a man a fish, and he has food for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he has to buy fishing licenses, park passes, rods, reels, fishing lines, hooks, tackle boxes, lures, spinners, sinkers, bobbers, nets, bait, knives, hats, fishing vests, fish finders, depth sounders, boats, outboard motors, gas cans, trailers, global positioning systems, ice chests, bags of ice, waders, buckets, sunglasses, sunscreen lotions, first aid kits, floatation vests, sandwiches, beverages, fishing pliers, cameras, binoculars, weight scales, tape measures, folding chairs, a 4-wheel drive vehicle, bumper stickers, ropes . . . did we forget anything?
“A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other.” -Samuel Johnson
The Good Lord Sends the Fishing
Sitting still and wishing
Made no person great;
The good Lord sends the fishing,
But you must dig the bait.
by Author Unknown
To catch a Swedish fish . . . use a gummy worm. (A ‘Swedish fish’ is a candy.)
“Let your hook be always cast, for a fish lurks even in the most unlikely waters.” -Ovid (Publius Ovidius Naso)
The Fishing Pole
A fishing pole’s a curious thing,
It’s made of just a stick and string;
A boy at one end and a wish,
And on the other end a fish.
by Mary Caroline Davies
“The fish does not go after the hook, but after the bait.” -Author Unknown: Czech proverb
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they will not bother you for weeks.
“Most of the world is covered by water. A fisherman’s job is simple: Pick out the best parts.” -Charles Waterman
“Fish: An underwater creature that grows fastest between when it is caught and the time the fisherman describes it to his friends.” -Author Unknown
“Bragging may not bring happiness, but no man having caught a large fish goes home through an alley.” -Ann Landers
Bret: How do you get your little sister to find so many worms for you when you want to go fishing?
Bert: Oh, that’s easy. Out of every ten she digs up, I let her have one to eat.
“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Unless he doesn’t like sushi - then you also have to teach him to cook.” -Auren Hoffman
Kel: Are you fishing?
Cal: No, just teaching worms to swim.
Fish
One, two, three, four, five,
I caught a fish alive.
Six, seven, eight, nine, ten,
I let him go again!
Why did I let him go?
Because he bit my finger so.
Which finger did he bite?
The little one on the right.
by Author Unknown
Once upon a time, there was a fisherman who was always talking about the giant fish he almost caught. One day he took his two sons, Toward and Away, fishing with him. That night, he returned more excited than ever. “Honey,” he yelled to his wife, “you should have seen the fish I saw today. A tremendous green fish, ten feet long, with horns and fur all over its back. It came crawling out of the water, snatched our son Toward, and swallowed him in one gulp!” “Good gracious!” exclaimed his wife. “That’s horrible!” “Oh, that was nothing,” said her husband. “You should have seen the one that got Away!”
“The two best times to fish is when it’s rainin’ and when it ain’t.” -Patrick F. McManus
“Fishing gives you a sense of where you fit in the scheme of things - your place in the Universe . . . I, mean, here I am, one small guy with a fishing pole in this vast world and out there in the blue expanse of ocean are hundreds of millions of fish . . . all of them laughing at me . . .” -Author Unknown
“The early angler catches the best fishing spot.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he was. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows on it. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman, and said, “Only caught one, eh?”
“Net income: The money a fisherman earns.” -Author Unknown
Two would-be fishermen rented a boat, and one caught a large fish. “We should mark the spot,” he said. The other fisherman drew a large ‘X’ in the bottom of the boat with a black felt-tip marker. “That’s no good,” said the first fisherman. “Next time out we might not get the same boat.”
“When you fall into a river, you are no longer an angler, you are a swimmer.” -Author Unknown
“All men are equal before fish.” -Herbert Hoover
“Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will stop bothering you.” -Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishin’
S’pose the fish don’t bite at fust,
What be yew goin’ tur dew?
Chuck down yewr pole, throw out yewr bait
An’ say yewr fishin’s threw?
Uv course yew hain’t; yew’re goin’ tur fish,
An’ fish, an’ fish, an’ wait
Until yew’ve ketched yewr baskit full,
An’ used up all yewr bait.
S’pose success don’t come at fust,
What be yew goin’ tur dew?
Throw up the sponge an’ kick yewrself,
An’ go tur feelin’ blew?
Uv course yew hain’t; yew’re goin’ tur fish,
An’ bait, an’ bait agin’;
Bimeby success will bite yewr hook,
An’ yew will pull him in.
by Harry N. Dascomb
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishing and Anglers Quiz
- What other creatures besides fishes can be caught with a rod and reel?
- How are freshly caught fishes cleaned and prepared before cooking?
- How much does a fishing license cost in your area?
“An angler is a man who spends rainy days sitting around on the muddy banks of rivers doing nothing because his wife won’t let him do it at home.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in the “Irish News”
That Fish Was Just Too Fussy
I said to a fish in a lake
“I have worms, peas, and chocolate cake.
Would you care for a bite?”
Said the fish, “I just might,
But I think it would be a mistake.”
by John Ciardi
“The charm of fishing is that it is the pursuit of what is elusive but attainable, a perpetual series of occasions for hope.” -John Buchan
Could you catch fish, and sell them to luckless anglers who caught nothing, or to local restaurants, hotels, and grocers?
“Catch a man a fish, and you can sell it to him. Teach a man to fish, and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.” -Author Unknown
A man went ice fishing. He took out an ice pick and began to hack away. He heard a voice from above say, “There are no fish there.” He went to another spot and started to pick away. Again came the voice: “There are no fish there, either.” He tried a third spot. Once more he heard the voice from above - “Nope. Not there, either.” Finally, the man grew a little nervous, so he looked up and asked, “Are you God?” The voice from above boomed, “No, I’m the arena manager.”
“When I’m tired and can’t sleep, I count fish instead of sheep.” -Author Unknown
“Give a lazy person a fish and he will eat it. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and sleep all day.” -Author Unknown
This is MFOL! . . . Now we had all better get to bed early so we can get up early to get the best fishing spot early tomorrow morning to catch the food called fish . . .
“The early angler catches the best fishing spot.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he was. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows on it. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman, and said, “Only caught one, eh?”
“Net income: The money a fisherman earns.” -Author Unknown
Two would-be fishermen rented a boat, and one caught a large fish. “We should mark the spot,” he said. The other fisherman drew a large ‘X’ in the bottom of the boat with a black felt-tip marker. “That’s no good,” said the first fisherman. “Next time out we might not get the same boat.”
“When you fall into a river, you are no longer an angler, you are a swimmer.” -Author Unknown
“All men are equal before fish.” -Herbert Hoover
“Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will stop bothering you.” -Author Unknown
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishin’
S’pose the fish don’t bite at fust,
What be yew goin’ tur dew?
Chuck down yewr pole, throw out yewr bait
An’ say yewr fishin’s threw?
Uv course yew hain’t; yew’re goin’ tur fish,
An’ fish, an’ fish, an’ wait
Until yew’ve ketched yewr baskit full,
An’ used up all yewr bait.
S’pose success don’t come at fust,
What be yew goin’ tur dew?
Throw up the sponge an’ kick yewrself,
An’ go tur feelin’ blew?
Uv course yew hain’t; yew’re goin’ tur fish,
An’ bait, an’ bait agin’;
Bimeby success will bite yewr hook,
An’ yew will pull him in.
by Harry N. Dascomb
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ www.MakeFunOfLife.net ♥ l o v e ☼ g r o w
▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬●▬
Fishing and Anglers Quiz
- What other creatures besides fishes can be caught with a rod and reel?
- How are freshly caught fishes cleaned and prepared before cooking?
- How much does a fishing license cost in your area?
“An angler is a man who spends rainy days sitting around on the muddy banks of rivers doing nothing because his wife won’t let him do it at home.” -Author Unknown: as quoted in the “Irish News”
That Fish Was Just Too Fussy
I said to a fish in a lake
“I have worms, peas, and chocolate cake.
Would you care for a bite?”
Said the fish, “I just might,
But I think it would be a mistake.”
by John Ciardi
“The charm of fishing is that it is the pursuit of what is elusive but attainable, a perpetual series of occasions for hope.” -John Buchan
Could you catch fish, and sell them to luckless anglers who caught nothing, or to local restaurants, hotels, and grocers?
“Catch a man a fish, and you can sell it to him. Teach a man to fish, and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.” -Author Unknown
A man went ice fishing. He took out an ice pick and began to hack away. He heard a voice from above say, “There are no fish there.” He went to another spot and started to pick away. Again came the voice: “There are no fish there, either.” He tried a third spot. Once more he heard the voice from above - “Nope. Not there, either.” Finally, the man grew a little nervous, so he looked up and asked, “Are you God?” The voice from above boomed, “No, I’m the arena manager.”
“When I’m tired and can’t sleep, I count fish instead of sheep.” -Author Unknown
“Give a lazy person a fish and he will eat it. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and sleep all day.” -Author Unknown
This is MFOL! . . . Now we had all better get to bed early so we can get up early to get the best fishing spot early tomorrow morning to catch the food called fish . . .