If my dear you seek to slumber,
Count the stars in endless number;
If you still continue wakeful,
Count the drops that make a lakeful.
-Franklin P. Adams (Franklin Pierce Adams (1881 - 1960))
Olive: What is the difference between a sleeping person and an awake person?
Oliver: With some people, it can be hard to tell the difference.
With a butterfly kiss and a ladybug hug,
Sleep tight little one, like a bug in a rug.
-Author Unknown
Sleep and Sleeping Facts
- The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
- The ideal temperature for falling asleep is between 18 and 30 degrees Celsius (64 and 86 degrees Fahrenheit).
- About ninety percent of people depend on an alarm clock to wake them up.
- The most frequently requested wakeup call time at hotels is 7:00 a.m.
“Nothing makes us so sleepy as the bell of our alarm clock.” -William Feather (William Arthur Feather (1889 - 1981)): as quoted in Ted Landphair: “Featherisms” (6 October 2008)
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The Cock Crows
The cock crows in the morn
To tell us to rise,
And he that lies late
Will never be wise.
For early to bed
And early to rise
Is the way to be healthy,
Wealthy, and wise.
by Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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“Sleeping is easy - I can even do it with my eyes closed.” -Author Unknown
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I walk in my sleep!
Doctor: Remember to take money for the bus, then!
“The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.” -Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
Al: Did you hear the joke about the bed?
Len: No.
Al: That’s because it hasn’t been ‘made up’ yet.
A proposed new invention, the microwave bed, would allow a person to get eight hours sleep in just three minutes. We are going to buy two of them, so that we can get eight hours of sleep in just one-and-a-half minutes!
Georgia: How can you shorten a bed?
George: Don’t sleep ‘long’ on it.
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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Keep a Poem in Your Pocket
Keep a poem in your pocket
and a picture in your head
and you’ll never feel lonely
at night when you’re in bed.
The little poem will sing to you
the little picture bring to you
a dozen dreams to dance to you
at night when you’re in bed.
So - keep a picture in your pocket
and poem in your head
and you’ll never feel lonely
at night when you’re in bed.
by Beatrice Schenk de Regniers (1914 - 2000)
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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“There is a close connection between getting up in the world and getting up in the morning.” -Author Unknown
Count the stars in endless number;
If you still continue wakeful,
Count the drops that make a lakeful.
-Franklin P. Adams (Franklin Pierce Adams (1881 - 1960))
Olive: What is the difference between a sleeping person and an awake person?
Oliver: With some people, it can be hard to tell the difference.
With a butterfly kiss and a ladybug hug,
Sleep tight little one, like a bug in a rug.
-Author Unknown
Sleep and Sleeping Facts
- The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
- The ideal temperature for falling asleep is between 18 and 30 degrees Celsius (64 and 86 degrees Fahrenheit).
- About ninety percent of people depend on an alarm clock to wake them up.
- The most frequently requested wakeup call time at hotels is 7:00 a.m.
“Nothing makes us so sleepy as the bell of our alarm clock.” -William Feather (William Arthur Feather (1889 - 1981)): as quoted in Ted Landphair: “Featherisms” (6 October 2008)
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
The Cock Crows
The cock crows in the morn
To tell us to rise,
And he that lies late
Will never be wise.
For early to bed
And early to rise
Is the way to be healthy,
Wealthy, and wise.
by Author Unknown
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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“Sleeping is easy - I can even do it with my eyes closed.” -Author Unknown
Patient: Doctor, doctor, I walk in my sleep!
Doctor: Remember to take money for the bus, then!
“The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more.” -Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
Al: Did you hear the joke about the bed?
Len: No.
Al: That’s because it hasn’t been ‘made up’ yet.
A proposed new invention, the microwave bed, would allow a person to get eight hours sleep in just three minutes. We are going to buy two of them, so that we can get eight hours of sleep in just one-and-a-half minutes!
Georgia: How can you shorten a bed?
George: Don’t sleep ‘long’ on it.
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
Keep a Poem in Your Pocket
Keep a poem in your pocket
and a picture in your head
and you’ll never feel lonely
at night when you’re in bed.
The little poem will sing to you
the little picture bring to you
a dozen dreams to dance to you
at night when you’re in bed.
So - keep a picture in your pocket
and poem in your head
and you’ll never feel lonely
at night when you’re in bed.
by Beatrice Schenk de Regniers (1914 - 2000)
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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“There is a close connection between getting up in the world and getting up in the morning.” -Author Unknown
“An important part of your bedtime routine should be checking to see if there are monsters hiding under your bed. If there are any, get them each a glass of milk and some cookies.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
Edward: What is huge and gray and sends people to sleep?
Eduardo: A hypno-potamus.
“There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.” -Author Unknown
“If people were meant to pop out of bed, we’d all sleep in toasters.” -Author Unknown
Ellie: Why was the man running around his bed?
Lou: Because he wanted to catch up on his sleep.
“I had just dozed off into a stupor when I heard what I thought was myself talking to myself. I didn’t pay much attention to it, as I knew practically everything I would have to say to myself, and wasn’t particularly interested.” -Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945)
Pollyanna: What question can never be answered with, “Yes.”?
Jenna: “Are you asleep?”
“To sleep - perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub!” -William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616): “The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark” (1601), Act III, Scene 1, line 1758; words of fictional character Hamlet
Robin: What is the best thing to do if you are a worm who is worried about being caught by the early bird?
Sparrow: Sleep late!
Last night, as I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, I thought to myself, “Where is the ceiling?”
Ersa: Where does the Little Mermaid sleep?
Erma: In a water-bed.
“It is no small art to sleep, to achieve it one must keep awake all day.” -Friedrich Nietzsche (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844 - 1900))
Jeffrey: Who sleeps at night with his shoes still on?
Geoffrey: A horse.
“He who sleeps in continual noise is wakened by silence.” -W. D. Howells (William Dean Howells (1837 - 1920))
Goodnight stars
Goodnight air
Goodnight noises everywhere
-Margaret Wise Brown: “Goodnight Moon” (1947)
“Oversleeping keeps a lot of dreams from coming true.” -Charley Grant
A Ruggie is a pressure-sensitive alarm clock that looks like a floor mat. You place it on the floor beside your bed, it awakens you in the morning with an alarm sound, and then it shuts off only after you get up and stand on it. Now that is one way to be sure you head out of bed in the morning! To learn more about Ruggies, visit www.ruggie.co (please note that the website suffix is ‘.co’ rather than ‘.com’).
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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Goodnight!
Goodnight, sleep tight,
Don’t let the bedbugs bite -
If they do, get your shoe,
And hit them till they’re black and blue!
Goodnight, sleep tight,
Don’t let the bedbugs bite -
If they do, here’s what to do:
Blow them up with dynamite!
by Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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Al: I haven’t slept for days.
Elle: How come?
Al: I only sleep at night.
“Put duties aside at least an hour before bed and perform soothing, quiet activities that will help you relax.” -Dianne Hales
“I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it’s going to be up all night.” -Steven Wright (born 1955)
Edward: What is huge and gray and sends people to sleep?
Eduardo: A hypno-potamus.
“There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.” -Author Unknown
“If people were meant to pop out of bed, we’d all sleep in toasters.” -Author Unknown
Ellie: Why was the man running around his bed?
Lou: Because he wanted to catch up on his sleep.
“I had just dozed off into a stupor when I heard what I thought was myself talking to myself. I didn’t pay much attention to it, as I knew practically everything I would have to say to myself, and wasn’t particularly interested.” -Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945)
Pollyanna: What question can never be answered with, “Yes.”?
Jenna: “Are you asleep?”
“To sleep - perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub!” -William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616): “The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark” (1601), Act III, Scene 1, line 1758; words of fictional character Hamlet
Robin: What is the best thing to do if you are a worm who is worried about being caught by the early bird?
Sparrow: Sleep late!
Last night, as I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, I thought to myself, “Where is the ceiling?”
Ersa: Where does the Little Mermaid sleep?
Erma: In a water-bed.
“It is no small art to sleep, to achieve it one must keep awake all day.” -Friedrich Nietzsche (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844 - 1900))
Jeffrey: Who sleeps at night with his shoes still on?
Geoffrey: A horse.
“He who sleeps in continual noise is wakened by silence.” -W. D. Howells (William Dean Howells (1837 - 1920))
Goodnight stars
Goodnight air
Goodnight noises everywhere
-Margaret Wise Brown: “Goodnight Moon” (1947)
“Oversleeping keeps a lot of dreams from coming true.” -Charley Grant
A Ruggie is a pressure-sensitive alarm clock that looks like a floor mat. You place it on the floor beside your bed, it awakens you in the morning with an alarm sound, and then it shuts off only after you get up and stand on it. Now that is one way to be sure you head out of bed in the morning! To learn more about Ruggies, visit www.ruggie.co (please note that the website suffix is ‘.co’ rather than ‘.com’).
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
Goodnight!
Goodnight, sleep tight,
Don’t let the bedbugs bite -
If they do, get your shoe,
And hit them till they’re black and blue!
Goodnight, sleep tight,
Don’t let the bedbugs bite -
If they do, here’s what to do:
Blow them up with dynamite!
by Author Unknown
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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Al: I haven’t slept for days.
Elle: How come?
Al: I only sleep at night.
“Put duties aside at least an hour before bed and perform soothing, quiet activities that will help you relax.” -Dianne Hales
“I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it’s going to be up all night.” -Steven Wright (born 1955)
In the days of English playwright William Shakespeare (1564 - 1616), mattresses were filled with straw and held up by rope stretched across the bed frames. When someone pulled on the rope to tighten it, a mattress would sag less and become firmer, for a more comfortable sleep . . . and that is supposedly the origin of the phrase, “Good night, sleep tight!”
“When they cannot get to sleep, some people count sheep, and others talk to the Shepherd.” -Author Unknown
“One hour’s sleep before midnight is worth three after.” [translation to Late Modern English]
“One houre’s sleepe before midnight is worth three after.” [original Early Modern English]
-Author Unknown: as quoted in George Herbert (1593 - 1633): “Jacula Prudentum; or Outlandish Proverbs, Sentences, &c. Selected by Mr. George Herbert” (1651), proverb 876
A man went to a doctor for a checkup. The doctor asked, “How do you sleep?” The man said, “I sleep good at night and I sleep good in the morning, but come afternoon, I get restless!”
“It’s hard to sleep at night if you’re worried that a ten-pound frog from Southern Cameroon may come and jump on your stomach.” -Charles M. Schulz (Charles Monroe ‘Sparky’ Schulz (1922 - 2000))
Overheard: I slept like a log last night . . . and I woke up this morning on the woodpile.
“May you sleep like a log . . . but not like a sawmill.” -Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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Bedtime
The evening is coming,
The Sun sinks to rest;
The rooks are all flying
Straight home to their rest.
“Caw!” says the rook,
As he flies overhead;
“It’s time little people
Were going to bed!”
by Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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If you cannot sleep, try counting your blessings. For example, you still have most of your fingers and toes, you can still think lots of interesting thoughts, and you have a sense of humor that allows you to recognize that this is a joke. What other blessings can you add to this list?
Husband: It must be time to get up.
Wife: How can you tell?
Husband: The baby has finally fallen asleep.
“I find that when you have a real interest in life and a curious life, that sleep is not the most important thing.” -Martha Stewart
“He who sleeps on the floor will not fall off the bed.” -Robert Gronock
A Little Thought to Close the Day
The day, with the work God gave me to do, is done, and now He has given me the night, quiet and soothing, for rest. I will, therefore, trust myself - body and spirit - into His loving, tender care, through the mystery of sleep. As flood tides from the ocean fill each bay or inlet, so power and love and peace can fill my life to overflowing as I rest quietly, serenely, patiently, bravely, lovingly, with confidence and perfect faith.
by Author Unknown
“Sweet are the slumbers of the virtuous man.” -Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719)
Helpful Tip: A spring-loaded mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
“Before you sleep, read something that is exquisite, and worth remembering.” -Desiderius Erasmus Roterdamus (also known as Erasmus of Rotterdam or simply Erasmus (1466 - 1536))
Toby: How do you know an elephant is hiding under your bed?
Tobias: Because when you get into bed, your nose touches the ceiling.
We are MFOL! . . . making life a little funnier . . .
“When they cannot get to sleep, some people count sheep, and others talk to the Shepherd.” -Author Unknown
“One hour’s sleep before midnight is worth three after.” [translation to Late Modern English]
“One houre’s sleepe before midnight is worth three after.” [original Early Modern English]
-Author Unknown: as quoted in George Herbert (1593 - 1633): “Jacula Prudentum; or Outlandish Proverbs, Sentences, &c. Selected by Mr. George Herbert” (1651), proverb 876
A man went to a doctor for a checkup. The doctor asked, “How do you sleep?” The man said, “I sleep good at night and I sleep good in the morning, but come afternoon, I get restless!”
“It’s hard to sleep at night if you’re worried that a ten-pound frog from Southern Cameroon may come and jump on your stomach.” -Charles M. Schulz (Charles Monroe ‘Sparky’ Schulz (1922 - 2000))
Overheard: I slept like a log last night . . . and I woke up this morning on the woodpile.
“May you sleep like a log . . . but not like a sawmill.” -Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
Bedtime
The evening is coming,
The Sun sinks to rest;
The rooks are all flying
Straight home to their rest.
“Caw!” says the rook,
As he flies overhead;
“It’s time little people
Were going to bed!”
by Author Unknown
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼
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If you cannot sleep, try counting your blessings. For example, you still have most of your fingers and toes, you can still think lots of interesting thoughts, and you have a sense of humor that allows you to recognize that this is a joke. What other blessings can you add to this list?
Husband: It must be time to get up.
Wife: How can you tell?
Husband: The baby has finally fallen asleep.
“I find that when you have a real interest in life and a curious life, that sleep is not the most important thing.” -Martha Stewart
“He who sleeps on the floor will not fall off the bed.” -Robert Gronock
A Little Thought to Close the Day
The day, with the work God gave me to do, is done, and now He has given me the night, quiet and soothing, for rest. I will, therefore, trust myself - body and spirit - into His loving, tender care, through the mystery of sleep. As flood tides from the ocean fill each bay or inlet, so power and love and peace can fill my life to overflowing as I rest quietly, serenely, patiently, bravely, lovingly, with confidence and perfect faith.
by Author Unknown
“Sweet are the slumbers of the virtuous man.” -Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719)
Helpful Tip: A spring-loaded mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
“Before you sleep, read something that is exquisite, and worth remembering.” -Desiderius Erasmus Roterdamus (also known as Erasmus of Rotterdam or simply Erasmus (1466 - 1536))
Toby: How do you know an elephant is hiding under your bed?
Tobias: Because when you get into bed, your nose touches the ceiling.
We are MFOL! . . . making life a little funnier . . .