**Maybe numbers are not so scary after all . . .**

Candace: What is the number 2’s favorite day of the week?

Ophelia: Twosday!

Counting

Here I come number one

Like an ostrich I can run

Here I come number two

Bouncing like a kangaroo

Here I come number three

Squich, squich, squich like a chimpanzee

Here I come number four

Like a lion I can roar

Here I come number five

Teach the elephants how to jive

Here I come number six

Monkeys doing lots of tricks

Here I come number seven

Eagles soar up to Heaven

Here I come number eight

Flamingoes stand so tall and straight

Here I come number nine

Penguins marching in a line

Here I come number ten

The animals shout, “Let’s begin again!”

-Author Unknown

One: Slightly more than none.

If you were to start counting right now nonstop for twenty-four hours every day, you would be over 31,000 years old by the time you counted up to one trillion. 1, 2, 3, 4 . . . did we mention that you would also be very sleepy, since you would be counting twenty-four hours a day without sleep?

The Garden

One, two, three,

The garden is growing.

Four, five, six,

Now it needs hoeing.

Seven, eight, nine,

Down go the weeds.

Ten, eleven, twelve,

Water it needs.

Thirteen, fourteen,

Here comes a shower.

Fifteen, sixteen,

A carrot and a flower!

-Author Unknown

Can you imagine trying to count without numbers?

The number 4 is the only number in the English language that has the same number of letters in its name as in its meaning.

“It’s easy to identify people who can’t count to ten. They’re in front of you in the supermarket express lane.” -June Henderson

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Want.

Want, who?

Good, now try counting to three!

Overheard: Some people say one is a lonely number, but it also must be a very brave and strong little number to stand all on its own.

Problem: On your way to Clown College, you count twenty houses on your right, and on your way home, you count twenty houses on your left. How many houses have you counted in total?

Solution: Twenty, because you counted the same houses both times.

Number Printing Poem

Number 1

is like a stick

A straight line down

that’s very quick!

For number 2

go right around

Then make a line

across the ground!

Go right around

What will it be?

Go round again

to make a 3!

Down and over

and down some more

That’s the way

to make a 4!

Go down and around

Then you stop

Finish the 5

with a line on top!

Make a curve

Then a loop

There are no tricks

to making a 6!

Across the sky

and down from Heaven

That’s the way

to make a 7!

Make a ‘S’

And then don’t wait

Climb up again

to make an 8!

Make a loop

And then a line

That’s the way

to make a 9!

Make a 1

and then an ‘o’

10 are all your fingers

you know!

-Author Unknown

Mary: Do you know what seems odd?

Paul: Numbers that are not divisible by 2?

Our modern-day system of numbers is often erroneously called ‘Arabic numerals,’ but they were invented in India by Arya Bhatta, so perhaps they should be called ‘Indian numerals.’

“If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give Fido only two of them.” -Phil Pastoret

Number Poem

Down you run and 1 is done.

Around, and down, and out go you,

That’s the way to make a 2.

Around, and around, just like a bee,

That’s the way to make a 3.

Down, across, and down once more,

That’s the way to make a 4.

Short neck, belly fat,

Number 5 wears a hat.

Down, around, in a circle you go,

That’s a six, just as you know.

Straight across, slide down from Heaven,

That’s the way to make a 7.

First a snake, then come back straight,

That’s the way to make an 8.

First a ball and then a line,

That’s the way to make a 9.

Tall straight, circle then,

That’s the way to make a 10.

-Author Unknown

Zero is the first and only number that contains a letter ‘z.’ Please note that although ‘zillion’ also contains a z, it is not an actual number, but just a term for a vaguely large undefined quantity.

Randy: Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Randall: Because 7, 8, 9!

There once was a town in West Virginia, United States of America called ‘6.’

Take a Number

Imagine a world

Without mathematics

No rulers or scales

No inches or feet

No dates or numbers

On house or street

No prices or weights

No determining heights

No hours running through

Days and nights

No zero, no birthdays

No way to subtract

All of the guesswork

Surrounding the fact

No sizes for shoes

Or suit or hat

Wouldn’t it be awful

To live like that?

-Mary O’Neill

Zero: A nice round number.

A simpleton was watching the news with her friend. The newscaster said, “There was a plane crash today. Seven Austrian men and two Brazilian men are among the confirmed casualties.” The simpleton turned to her friend and said, “Oh my goodness! What a disaster! How many are in a Brazilian?”

What comes after a million, a billion, and a trillion? A quadrillion, a quintillion, a sextillion, a septillion, an octillion, a nonillion, a decillion, and an undecillion.

Augustus: What do you call a number that cannot keep still?

Caesar: A roamin’ numeral.

Roman Numerals

1 is I.

5 is V.

10 is X.

50 is L.

100 is C.

500 is D.

1,000 is M.

How do you write zero as a Roman numeral? The answer is that it cannot be done. The Romans had no number zero - what, no zero? Wowzers!

There are three types of people: those who know how to count, and those who do not.

Why is ‘quite a few’ the same as ‘quite a lot’?

One ‘googol’ is the number 1 followed by 100 zeros. A ‘googolplex’ is the number 1 followed by a googol zeros, a number so ridiculously big that it cannot be written down, because there is not enough room in the Universe to fit it in. In fact, one googolplex is a number so big that there is not even enough matter in the Universe to form all the zeros in it.

Great and Fine

Zero, two, four, six, eight:

Being even is just great!

One, three, five, seven, nine:

Being odd is just fine!

-Author Unknown

Infinity is an endless quantity that goes on forever. Infinity cannot be reached. Infinity cannot be measured. Infinity is not growing; it is already fully formed. The ‘lemniscate’ is the symbol for infinity. It looks like a number eight that has fallen over or is resting on its side, and for this reason, some people call it a ‘lazy eight.’

Remember, you have to be ‘odd’ if you want to be ‘Number 1’!

According to the latest news, we are running out of numbers and soon we will not be able to count things. Trading in the number 14 has been frozen as the number hit dizzying heights in the stock market before yesterday’s closing bell. Shoppers have been reporting that they are finding local retailers are completely sold out of the number 20. Numbers expert Adam Uppe has written two best-selling books on the subject, titled “How to Survive the Coming Number Shortage” and “Living in a World Without Numbers,” both from Infinity Publishing House.

Attie: What 5-digit number has 6 left when 2 is taken away from it?

Attila: Sixty, which becomes six when two letters are taken away.

Arithmophobia, also known as numerophobia, is a fear of numbers generally, but can also refer to a fear of math, numerals, certain numbers, calculations, and/or calculus. In schools, it is more commonly known as ‘math anxiety.’ The condition is fortunately not common, but for the few who do suffer from it, it is quite serious. Perhaps singing songs containing numbers could help console those frazzled few?

Annie: In what way is the number 9 like a peacock?

Ian: It is nothing without its tail.

Numbers and Counting Facts

- A few is two or more of something.

- A couple or a pair is two of something.

- A triple or a triplet is three of something.

- A quadruple or a quadruplet is four of something.

- A dozen is twelve of something.

- A gross is a dozen dozens, which is 12 x 12 or 144.

- A score is twenty of something.

Steven: How do you make the number one disappear?

Stephen: Add a ‘g’ to it and it is ‘gone’!

Triskaidekaphobia is a persistent fear of the number 13. ‘Triskaidekaphobia’ is derived from the Greek words ‘tris’ meaning ‘three,’ ‘kai’ meaning ‘and,’ ‘deka’ meaning ‘ten,’ and ‘phobos’ meaning ‘fear.’ Many buildings have no 13th floor because some people associate the number 13 with bad luck. The buildings have a 12th floor, and right above that is a floor designated as the 14th floor.

“2-in-1 is a stupid term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That’s why 2 was created.” -Mitch Hedberg

The number 2 is the only number greater than zero that when added to or multiplied by itself gives the same result: 4.

Amanda: What do the numbers 11 and 69 and 88 all have in common?

Amy: They can all be flipped upside down and still be the same.

While visiting Annapolis, a man noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. “What are they doing?” he asked the tour guide. “Each year,” the tour guide replied with a grin, “the upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard.” “So what’s the answer?” my friend asked him when we were out of earshot of the freshmen. The guide replied, “Just one.”

Meredith: Do you know what is special about the number 8,549,176,320?

Merry: It contains the numbers zero through nine in alphabetical order.

Riddle:

My head and tail both equal are.

My middle is slender as a bee.

Whether I stand on head or heel

is quite the same to you or me.

But if my top half should be removed,

the matter’s true though passing strange,

Because then I to nothing would change.

What am I?

Answer:

I am a number 8.

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety-one or eleventeen?

Numbers and Counting Quiz

- Name an odd number.

- Name an even number.

- What number comes between 12 and 14?

- Write the Roman numeral X as an Indian numeral.

- Write the Indian numeral 5 as a Roman numeral.

- What happens when you write a 0 (zero) after any other number?

- Why do we need numbers?

- How many is a few?

- How many is a couple or a pair?

- How many is a triple or triplet?

- How many is a quadruple or quadruplet?

- How many is a dozen?

- How many is a gross?

- If a score is twenty, how many is four score and seven?

Bertha: I a number that rhymes with more - what am I?

Brenda: You are four.

“If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky?” -Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Names for the number ‘0’ include zero, naught, nil, zilch, and zip.

Nadine: What did the 0 say to the 8?

Tanya: “Nice belt.”

Please help us make every number count by sending your number and counting facts and jokes to MakeFunOfLife@mail.com. This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . now let’s all go count something . . .

Candace: What is the number 2’s favorite day of the week?

Ophelia: Twosday!

Counting

Here I come number one

Like an ostrich I can run

Here I come number two

Bouncing like a kangaroo

Here I come number three

Squich, squich, squich like a chimpanzee

Here I come number four

Like a lion I can roar

Here I come number five

Teach the elephants how to jive

Here I come number six

Monkeys doing lots of tricks

Here I come number seven

Eagles soar up to Heaven

Here I come number eight

Flamingoes stand so tall and straight

Here I come number nine

Penguins marching in a line

Here I come number ten

The animals shout, “Let’s begin again!”

-Author Unknown

One: Slightly more than none.

If you were to start counting right now nonstop for twenty-four hours every day, you would be over 31,000 years old by the time you counted up to one trillion. 1, 2, 3, 4 . . . did we mention that you would also be very sleepy, since you would be counting twenty-four hours a day without sleep?

The Garden

One, two, three,

The garden is growing.

Four, five, six,

Now it needs hoeing.

Seven, eight, nine,

Down go the weeds.

Ten, eleven, twelve,

Water it needs.

Thirteen, fourteen,

Here comes a shower.

Fifteen, sixteen,

A carrot and a flower!

-Author Unknown

Can you imagine trying to count without numbers?

The number 4 is the only number in the English language that has the same number of letters in its name as in its meaning.

“It’s easy to identify people who can’t count to ten. They’re in front of you in the supermarket express lane.” -June Henderson

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Want.

Want, who?

Good, now try counting to three!

Overheard: Some people say one is a lonely number, but it also must be a very brave and strong little number to stand all on its own.

Problem: On your way to Clown College, you count twenty houses on your right, and on your way home, you count twenty houses on your left. How many houses have you counted in total?

Solution: Twenty, because you counted the same houses both times.

Number Printing Poem

Number 1

is like a stick

A straight line down

that’s very quick!

For number 2

go right around

Then make a line

across the ground!

Go right around

What will it be?

Go round again

to make a 3!

Down and over

and down some more

That’s the way

to make a 4!

Go down and around

Then you stop

Finish the 5

with a line on top!

Make a curve

Then a loop

There are no tricks

to making a 6!

Across the sky

and down from Heaven

That’s the way

to make a 7!

Make a ‘S’

And then don’t wait

Climb up again

to make an 8!

Make a loop

And then a line

That’s the way

to make a 9!

Make a 1

and then an ‘o’

10 are all your fingers

you know!

-Author Unknown

Mary: Do you know what seems odd?

Paul: Numbers that are not divisible by 2?

Our modern-day system of numbers is often erroneously called ‘Arabic numerals,’ but they were invented in India by Arya Bhatta, so perhaps they should be called ‘Indian numerals.’

“If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give Fido only two of them.” -Phil Pastoret

Number Poem

Down you run and 1 is done.

Around, and down, and out go you,

That’s the way to make a 2.

Around, and around, just like a bee,

That’s the way to make a 3.

Down, across, and down once more,

That’s the way to make a 4.

Short neck, belly fat,

Number 5 wears a hat.

Down, around, in a circle you go,

That’s a six, just as you know.

Straight across, slide down from Heaven,

That’s the way to make a 7.

First a snake, then come back straight,

That’s the way to make an 8.

First a ball and then a line,

That’s the way to make a 9.

Tall straight, circle then,

That’s the way to make a 10.

-Author Unknown

Zero is the first and only number that contains a letter ‘z.’ Please note that although ‘zillion’ also contains a z, it is not an actual number, but just a term for a vaguely large undefined quantity.

Randy: Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Randall: Because 7, 8, 9!

There once was a town in West Virginia, United States of America called ‘6.’

Take a Number

Imagine a world

Without mathematics

No rulers or scales

No inches or feet

No dates or numbers

On house or street

No prices or weights

No determining heights

No hours running through

Days and nights

No zero, no birthdays

No way to subtract

All of the guesswork

Surrounding the fact

No sizes for shoes

Or suit or hat

Wouldn’t it be awful

To live like that?

-Mary O’Neill

Zero: A nice round number.

A simpleton was watching the news with her friend. The newscaster said, “There was a plane crash today. Seven Austrian men and two Brazilian men are among the confirmed casualties.” The simpleton turned to her friend and said, “Oh my goodness! What a disaster! How many are in a Brazilian?”

What comes after a million, a billion, and a trillion? A quadrillion, a quintillion, a sextillion, a septillion, an octillion, a nonillion, a decillion, and an undecillion.

Augustus: What do you call a number that cannot keep still?

Caesar: A roamin’ numeral.

Roman Numerals

1 is I.

5 is V.

10 is X.

50 is L.

100 is C.

500 is D.

1,000 is M.

How do you write zero as a Roman numeral? The answer is that it cannot be done. The Romans had no number zero - what, no zero? Wowzers!

There are three types of people: those who know how to count, and those who do not.

Why is ‘quite a few’ the same as ‘quite a lot’?

One ‘googol’ is the number 1 followed by 100 zeros. A ‘googolplex’ is the number 1 followed by a googol zeros, a number so ridiculously big that it cannot be written down, because there is not enough room in the Universe to fit it in. In fact, one googolplex is a number so big that there is not even enough matter in the Universe to form all the zeros in it.

Great and Fine

Zero, two, four, six, eight:

Being even is just great!

One, three, five, seven, nine:

Being odd is just fine!

-Author Unknown

Infinity is an endless quantity that goes on forever. Infinity cannot be reached. Infinity cannot be measured. Infinity is not growing; it is already fully formed. The ‘lemniscate’ is the symbol for infinity. It looks like a number eight that has fallen over or is resting on its side, and for this reason, some people call it a ‘lazy eight.’

Remember, you have to be ‘odd’ if you want to be ‘Number 1’!

According to the latest news, we are running out of numbers and soon we will not be able to count things. Trading in the number 14 has been frozen as the number hit dizzying heights in the stock market before yesterday’s closing bell. Shoppers have been reporting that they are finding local retailers are completely sold out of the number 20. Numbers expert Adam Uppe has written two best-selling books on the subject, titled “How to Survive the Coming Number Shortage” and “Living in a World Without Numbers,” both from Infinity Publishing House.

Attie: What 5-digit number has 6 left when 2 is taken away from it?

Attila: Sixty, which becomes six when two letters are taken away.

Arithmophobia, also known as numerophobia, is a fear of numbers generally, but can also refer to a fear of math, numerals, certain numbers, calculations, and/or calculus. In schools, it is more commonly known as ‘math anxiety.’ The condition is fortunately not common, but for the few who do suffer from it, it is quite serious. Perhaps singing songs containing numbers could help console those frazzled few?

Annie: In what way is the number 9 like a peacock?

Ian: It is nothing without its tail.

Numbers and Counting Facts

- A few is two or more of something.

- A couple or a pair is two of something.

- A triple or a triplet is three of something.

- A quadruple or a quadruplet is four of something.

- A dozen is twelve of something.

- A gross is a dozen dozens, which is 12 x 12 or 144.

- A score is twenty of something.

Steven: How do you make the number one disappear?

Stephen: Add a ‘g’ to it and it is ‘gone’!

Triskaidekaphobia is a persistent fear of the number 13. ‘Triskaidekaphobia’ is derived from the Greek words ‘tris’ meaning ‘three,’ ‘kai’ meaning ‘and,’ ‘deka’ meaning ‘ten,’ and ‘phobos’ meaning ‘fear.’ Many buildings have no 13th floor because some people associate the number 13 with bad luck. The buildings have a 12th floor, and right above that is a floor designated as the 14th floor.

“2-in-1 is a stupid term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That’s why 2 was created.” -Mitch Hedberg

The number 2 is the only number greater than zero that when added to or multiplied by itself gives the same result: 4.

Amanda: What do the numbers 11 and 69 and 88 all have in common?

Amy: They can all be flipped upside down and still be the same.

While visiting Annapolis, a man noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. “What are they doing?” he asked the tour guide. “Each year,” the tour guide replied with a grin, “the upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard.” “So what’s the answer?” my friend asked him when we were out of earshot of the freshmen. The guide replied, “Just one.”

Meredith: Do you know what is special about the number 8,549,176,320?

Merry: It contains the numbers zero through nine in alphabetical order.

Riddle:

My head and tail both equal are.

My middle is slender as a bee.

Whether I stand on head or heel

is quite the same to you or me.

But if my top half should be removed,

the matter’s true though passing strange,

Because then I to nothing would change.

What am I?

Answer:

I am a number 8.

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety-one or eleventeen?

Numbers and Counting Quiz

- Name an odd number.

- Name an even number.

- What number comes between 12 and 14?

- Write the Roman numeral X as an Indian numeral.

- Write the Indian numeral 5 as a Roman numeral.

- What happens when you write a 0 (zero) after any other number?

- Why do we need numbers?

- How many is a few?

- How many is a couple or a pair?

- How many is a triple or triplet?

- How many is a quadruple or quadruplet?

- How many is a dozen?

- How many is a gross?

- If a score is twenty, how many is four score and seven?

Bertha: I a number that rhymes with more - what am I?

Brenda: You are four.

“If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky?” -Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Names for the number ‘0’ include zero, naught, nil, zilch, and zip.

Nadine: What did the 0 say to the 8?

Tanya: “Nice belt.”

Please help us make every number count by sending your number and counting facts and jokes to MakeFunOfLife@mail.com. This is ‘MFOL!’ . . . now let’s all go count something . . .