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Animals and Animal Natures

11/10/2019

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“Animals talk to each other; I never knew but one man who could understand them - I knew he could because he told me so himself.” -Mark Twain (pseudonym of Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835 - 1910))
 
Marty: Who grants wishes to animals?
Martin: Their furry godmother.
 
“Animals are such agreeable friends - they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms.” -George Eliot (pseudonym of Mary Anne Evans, also known as Marian Evans Cross (1819 - 1880)): “Scenes of Clerical life” (1858), ‘Mr. Gilfil’s Love Story’
 
Charlotte: Which animals live in mobile homes?
Charlene: Turtles, tortoises, snails, and hermit crabs.
 
“For a good life: Work like a dog. Eat like a horse. Think like a fox. And play like a rabbit.” -George E. Allen (1832 - 1907)
 
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l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e 
☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ 
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
 
How Creatures Move
 
The lion walks on padded paws,
     The squirrel leaps from limb to limb,
While flies can crawl straight up a wall,
     And seals can dive and swim.
 
The worm, he wiggles all around,
     The monkey swings by his tail,
And birds may hop upon the ground,
     Or spread their wings and sail.
 
by Author Unknown
 
══════════════════════════════════════════════════
l i v e ☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ l i v e
☆ l a u g h ツ l o v e ♥ g r o w ☼ 
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“There is something in animals beside the power of motion. They are not machines; they feel.” -Charles-Louis de Secondat (also known simply as Montesquieu (1689 - 1755))
[Emotions and Feelings]
 
Always Be Kind to Animals
 
Always be kind to animals,
     Morning, noon, and night.
For animals have feelings, too,
     And furthermore, they bite.
 
by John Gardner (1933 - 1982): “A Child’s Bestiary” (1977), ‘Introduction’
[Poetic Epigrams]
 
Zoophobia is a persistent fear of animals. It is understandable. Many animals have sharp teeth, sharp claws, powerful muscles, lightning speed, and strange ways about them. Perhaps even more frightening is that some animals display behaviors that are remarkably human-like, and humans are among the most terrifying of animals. We know this because we have met some of them.
 
“One reason why birds and horses are happy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses.” -Dale Carnegie (Dale Harbison Carnegie (born Dale Breckenridge Carnegey (1888 - 1955)))
 
When is Be Kind to Animals Week? It is observed in the first full week of May of each year.
 
Many Causes Have Animal Mascots
- Woodsy Owl says, “Give a hoot, don’t pollute.”
- McGruff the Crime Dog says, “Take a bite out of crime. Ruff!”
- Smokey the Bear says, “Only you can prevent wildfires.”
- Can you think of other animal mascots that support causes?
 
Animals and Animal Natures Facts
- About nine million different species of life call the Earth home.
- We are dependent on animals for our survival as a species.
- What other facts do you know about animals?
 
Look around, and you will notice many peculiarities about animals: Dogs chase cars, cats get stuck in trees, humans gossip, and spiders cannot find their way out of bathtubs. At Make Fun Of Life! we ourselves are always looking for fun things we might be able to do . . .
 
“I believe animals should be respected as citizens of this Earth. They should have the right to their own freedom, their own families, and their own life.” -John Feldmann (John William Feldmann (born 1967))
 
Here Is the Ostrich
 
Here is the ostrich straight and tall
Nodding his head above us all
Here is the long snake on the ground
Wriggling over the stones he found
Here are the birds that fly so high
Spreading their wings across the sky
Here is the hedgehog prickly and small
Rolling himself into a ball
Here is the spider scuttling around
Treading so lightly on the ground
Here are the children fast asleep
And here at night the owls do peep
 
by Author Unknown
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​Squirrel with pizza slice . . . don’t eat that junk food, squirrel - it will make you fat!
 
“People are beginning to see that the first requisite to success in life is to be a good animal.” -Herbert Spencer (1820 - 1903)
 
Danny: What do you get if you cross a cow and a camel?
Denny: A lumpy milkshake!
 
“There are unknown worlds of knowledge in brutes; and whenever you mark a horse, or a dog, with a peculiarly mild, calm, deep-seated eye, be sure he is an Aristotle or a Kant, tranquilly speculating upon the mysteries in man. No philosophers so thoroughly comprehend us as dogs and horses. They see through us at a glance. And after all, what is a horse but a species of four-footed dumb man, in a leathern overall, who happens to live upon oats, and toils for his masters, half-requited or abused, like the biped hewers of wood and drawers of water? But there is a touch of divinity even in brutes, and a special halo about a horse, that should forever exempt him from indignities.” -Herman Melville (1819 - 1891): “Redburn: His First Voyage” (1849)
 
Sidney: Where do lions and tigers and bears work out?
Cindy: At the jungle gym, silly!
 
“Animals can learn, but it is not by learning that they become dogs, cats, or horses. Only man has to learn to become what he is supposed to be.” -Eric Hoffer (1902 - 1983)
 
Jered: What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?
Jerome: A cockapoodledoo!
 
“We need another and a wiser and perhaps a more mystical concept of animals. Remote from universal nature, and living by complicated artifice, man in civilization surveys the creature through the glass of his knowledge and sees thereby a feather magnified and the whole image in distortion. We patronize them for their incompleteness, for their tragic fate of having taken form so far below ourselves. And therein we err, and greatly err. For the animal shall not be measured by man. In a world older and more complete than ours they move finished and complete, gifted with extensions of the senses we have lost or never attained, living by voices we shall never hear. They are not brethren, they are not underlings; they are other nations, caught with ourselves in the net of life and time, fellow prisoners of the splendor and travail of the earth.” -Henry Beston (1888 - 1968): “The Outermost House” (1928)
 
“Animals may be our friends, but they won’t pick you up at the airport.” -Bobcat Goldthwait (Robert Francis ‘Bobcat’ Goldthwait (born 1962))
 
Crepuscular animals are ones that are active primarily during twilight, or dawn and dusk. The word crepuscular is derived from the Latin word ‘crepusculum’ meaning ‘twilight.’ Crepuscular animals are different from diurnal (daylight) and nocturnal (night) active animals. Some animals that are thought of as being nocturnal are actually crepuscular.
 
A snake and a rabbit met. Never having seen a creature of that type before, each studied the other. The snake said, “You have long ears, two funny front teeth, and you go hippety-hop. You must be a rabbit.” The rabbit nodded and said, “You have oily skin, fangs, and a split tongue. You must be either a lawyer or a politician.”
 
The placement of donkeys’ eyes in their heads allows them to see all four feet at all times, enabling them to be very sure-footed animals.
 
“No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless he is absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.” -Fran Lebowitz (Frances Ann ‘Fran’ Lebowitz (born 1950)): “Social Studies” (1 August 1981)
 
Is it more than coincidence that there are so many ‘sets’ of animals that people easily confuse: turtles and tortoises, dolphins and porpoises, mice and voles, rabbits and hares . . . Can you think of others?
 
“Always remember, animals are people too, and they are citizens of planet Earth just as we are. That is not a right given to them by humankind. It is a right they have because they exist as God’s creatures, just as humans exist as God’s creatures.” -David Hugh Beaumont (born 1966)
 
Should there be an Animal Olympics?
 
“We need a way of life in which the animal, guided by reason, may romp, but will not bite.” -Abraham Myerson (1881 - 1948)
 
Hurt No Living Thing
 
Hurt no living thing:
Ladybug, nor butterfly,
Nor moth with dusty wing,
Nor cricket chirping cheerily,
Nor grasshopper so light of leap.
Nor dancing gnat, or beetle flat,
Nor harmless worms that creep.
 
by Christina Rossetti (Christina Georgina Rossetti (1830 - 1894))
 
“The best thing about animals is that they don’t talk much.” -Thornton Wilder (Thornton Niven Wilder (1897 - 1975))
 
Are animals people, too?
 
Fun fact: A domestic cat can frighten a black bear into climbing a tree.
 
Legal Disclaimer: No animals were harmed in the making of this topic; some, however, did show a total lack of interest . . .
 
Animals that can see behind themselves without turning their heads include rabbits and parrots.
 
Animal Names
 
Alligator, beetle, porcupine, whale,
Bobolink, panther, dragonfly, snail,
Crocodile, monkey, buffalo, hare,
Dromedary, leopard, mud turtle, bear,
Elephant, badger, pelican, ox,
Flying fish, reindeer, anaconda, fox,
Guinea pig, dolphin, antelope, goose,
Hummingbird, weasel, pickerel, moose,
Ibex, rhinoceros, owl, kangaroo,
Jackal, opossum, toad, cockatoo,
Kingfisher, peacock, anteater, bat,
Lizard, ichneumon, honeybee, rat,
Mockingbird, camel, grasshopper, mouse,
Nightingale, spider, cuttlefish, grouse,
Ocelot, pheasant, wolverine, auk,
Periwinkle, ermine, katydid, hawk,
Quail, hippopotamus, armadillo, moth,
Rattlesnake, lion, woodpecker, sloth,
Salamander, goldfinch, angleworm, dog,
Tiger, flamingo, scorpion, frog,
Unicorn, ostrich, nautilus, mole,
Viper, gorilla, basilisk, sole,
Whippoorwill, beaver, centipede, fawn,
Xeme, canary, polliwog, swan,
Yellowhammer, eagle, hyena, lark,
Zebra, chameleon, butterfly, shark.
 
by Author Unknown
 
Lela: What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
Ella: Fowl weather.
 
What are scruffs? Scruffs are an area of loose skin at the nape, or back of the neck of some animals, that can be gripped and held while lifting them, and if done carefully, no harm will be done to the animal. Which animals have scruffs in their necks? Animals that have scruffs include rabbits, dogs, and cats. Why do animals have scruffs? Animals have scruffs on their necks to allow their mothers to grab them with their mouths, lift them, and carry them, whether to safety or to home. However, once animals are full grown, they should not be lifted and carried by their scruffs because they are much heavier and doing so can cause physical pain and injury to them.
 
Ray: What do you get when you cross a parrot with a pig?
Trey: A bird that hogs the conversation.
 
An effective way to deal with predators is to smell bad (skunks) or taste terrible (Monarch butterflies). Other defenses include spikes or quills (porcupines), and scales (pangolins and reptiles). Predators are animals that hunt and eat other animals, as for example, humans are predators.
 
Sarah: A duck, a frog, and a skunk wanted to go to an amusement park. The admission was one dollar. Which one of the three could not afford to go?
Hannah: The skunk.
Sarah: Why?
Hannah: The duck had a bill and the frog had a greenback, but the skunk only had a scent.
 
“Lots of people talk to animals . . . Not very many listen, though . . . That’s the problem.” -Benjamin Hoff (born 1946): “The Tao Of Pooh” (1982); author website: https://www.benjaminhoffauthor.com/
 
Gigglepuss: What you get when you cross a hyena with a cat.
 
“Be a good animal, true to your animal instincts.” -D. H. Lawrence (David Herbert Lawrence (1885 - 1930))
 
This is MFOL! . . . there’s like, a bunch of animals in here, or something . . .
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